Disclaimer: I don't own Honey and Clover! I got the idea for this fic from episode 3. You all probably know what I'm talking about, Yamada confronting Mayama. Please just R&R! Got somewhat inspired from listening over and over again to Avril's "I'm With You".
I hate the rain. I hate the lights. I hate this city…
Why is love painful? The city lights and the cold rain make her remember that.
Yeah, she's just another girl lost and wounded because of unrequited love.
Just another girl.
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"Rika-san, be careful," a tall guy with glasses cautioned the woman who almost tripped as she made her way inside the taxi,
"Thank you, Mayama," she thanked him, as she folded her umbrella, the door just automatically shut, as it was the way it is in Japan's taxi community.
The four-eyed man had his eyes on the car as it vanished through the thick mantle of fog. All he could hear was the faint sounds of the engine.
He cared less about the strong rain and wind almost pushing him to the ground. He stared there for a while, not giving the weather a thought, until a girl came up to him with an open umbrella, supposedly fit for two people, but she had another one with her.
"Mayama, you'll catch a cold if you just stay there," the long haired girl said to the blank-faced Mayama Takumi.
He just turned to her and got the other umbrella that was in her right hand. He opened it, just walked away, leaving her in the rain.
She didn't want to give up. She must keep trying. Maybe something will change his mind eventually, and he'll learn to like her back, but, she's not a god, she can't alter fate. It's just the way it is.
She caught up with him in the school building. She found him again there, lying, not giving a thought about her feelings, not giving a thought about how much pain he's inflicted on her already. Like the usual, he'd light up a cigarette, and blew the smoke away, as if he was playing with it.
He noticed a shadow hovering over his body, but didn't bother to look at who it was. He knew who it was anyway.
"Just tell her," a female voice exhausted,
The word tell seemed to play over and over again in his ears. Do I really need to tell her? What more can I do to prove and show to her that I like her? This he told himself. He ignored Yamada's words, and turned away from her as he continued to puff more smoke, just adding the fog that was entering the empty room already.
"You're a coward Mayama, pretending to be cool when you can't even confess to a girl..." a hint of sarcasm filled her high-pitched voice, which caused him to wince and stand up,
"Just why do you care? It's not any of your business at all Yamada, just leave me alone," anger filled his voice as he threw his cigarette, purposely aiming it at a trashcan, but not being able to shoot it, he uttered a silent damn and lit another one,
"Because we-," when she thought he was going to puff again, her words were cut short by him when he stood and walked away from the bench he was lying on earlier and proceeded to the open door, leaning against it.
"You think I don't know?" he said, being able to see her surprised face from his peripheral vision,
"I'm not blind Yamada. I know you like me. So quit pretending, because I'm fully aware of it already," the expressionless Mayama added, enjoying the last puff of his second cigar.
She couldn't answer him anymore, because he was right. She wanted to leave. Leave that scene quickly before she starts the water works.
"You should stop smoking, you might get sick if you indulge in it too much," she advised him as she made her way out of the room.
Silence prevailed in the empty room, where Mayama was left, all alone with his thoughts of confusion.
Run away.
That filled her thoughts. Run away from him, run away from the rest of the world. The rain drops mixed with her cold tears, and the painful beats in her heart. She dropped her umbrella from running too fast that she tripped and fell down on her knees.
Soaked in the rain, she felt like a helpless child who couldn't do anything to get the thing that she really, really wanted.
"Why God? I don't understand! I don't understand any of this at all!" she sobbed as the strong, cold wind brushed against her pale, uncovered arms,
"I wish I didn't fall in love with him, I wish any of this didn't happen!" the hurt girl hugged herself. There was no one to hug her or make her feel warm.
She continued to cry in the rain, she could barely hear the footsteps that were nearing her. A hand appeared in front of her face, and as she looked up, it was only Morita, the one guy who could bear to hear all her cries and hurts.
He helped her stand up and picked up her stuff which were already soaked wet on the ground.
"Let's get you inside, it's getting pretty cold here already," Morita said, comforting the girl who felt miserable enough.
She was limping as they made their way up to the pottery room, the room where she would spend her days crying, letting the tears form little by little in the pots she makes.
Morita turned on the heater to make her feel warm, she was literally shivering already, but the sadness not being able to escape from her swollen eyes.
"Here," he said, handing a can of soda to her as he sat and wiped her face,
"Thanks Morita..." tears fell from her azure eyes again. He couldn't stand the sight of it and released a soft ssshh and tapped her back.
"Morita, can I ask a favor?"
He nodded in response as he jerked his foot at the sight of a cockroach, Yamada giggled and continued.
"Can you drive me home?" she asked him, taking another sip from her soda,
"Sure, after you dry up okay?" he added, tossing a towel at her which made her laugh a little again.
It was a good thing she had some spare clothes inside. She made Morita get out of the room so she could change. He gave her a cat whistle that made Yamada almost kick the door off.
"Done?" Morita asked from outside as he tried to peep,
"Yup, so stop peeping already Morita because I'm done changing!" she shouted at him as she opened the door.
They went downstairs, only to see the rain still going on, but it was a little soft now, unlike earlier it was like ice cubes falling.
Morita recently bought a new car, well he made a lot of money anyway, which even Yamada, and the others were unaware of where he gets the money to buy expensive things.
She put on the seatbelt, and Morita started the engine.
She turned on the radio only to hear a sad love song playing, but didn't turn it off.
Mayama kept appearing in her mind, which made it more painful.
I hate these street lights...
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I remember the time when you didn't run after me... I did it because I was naive enough to think that you'd stop me..."
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I hate the rain..
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It rains every time I cry... Pain strikes my fragile heart again...
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I hate myself... for loving you...
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I couldn't stop it... I always say that I hate you for not returning my love back, but, even with my words changing all the time, my feelings for you are still the same...
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She cried softly, not wanting to let Morita notice, to which he did already. Her friend couldn't do anything for her, it also pained him to see her hurting this much, but he couldn't do anything at all to stop the pain she's feeling. Looking outside at the gloomy sky, she realized, that even no matter what he says to her, no matter how painful his words were, she couldn't stop. She couldn't stop loving and wanting him.
Like her love and longing for him, the city lights of Tokyo, and the cold rain just won't go away.
Ah... I just feel so saddish again today, and it's raining again lol. Thanks for reading again and please R&R! :)