A/N: I'm feeling blue, and I have a need to write something. And here it is.
Disclaimer: Kurumada-sensei and Teshirogi-sensei
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Reverie
Yukitarina
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There was something about wandering inside a dream. A lot of things were overlapping, but there were some familiar details—symbols, targets, artifact, or appearance—similar with the previous ones.
At least that was what Julian Solo thought. He was dreaming now, feeling himself wandering on the path surrounded by colourful river. But on the river there were also mountains, and sometimes the clouds, or any other natural objects beyond his imagination. It didn't amaze him enough, though, after all he'd seen something much weirder.
What made him startled was a woman sitting on the side of the river. Her hair was silver and her dress was sky-blue. She looked peaceful, but sometimes her eyes dimmed in a way that made you think about sadness.
That woman, was the so-called similarity.
He saw her many times, flashing like a falling star, smiling like a princess, wandering so fast like a hare. But he never caught her materializing too long.
This time, she looked solid, staying there as if certain differences had come. As if this dream was the most special of all.
Julian Solo tilted his head, watching the woman with calculating look.
"Seraphina?" he asked.
She turned her head, and smiled slightly. "Hello, Julian," she greeted in a friendly tone, as an elder sister towards her brother. She stared at the river for some moment before saying, "Come here and sit."
Julian took a deep breath and did what she asked. He saw some bubbles, not in the river, but at the sky. Funny thing was the broken bubbles dripped rainbow-hued inks.
"Why are you here?" asked Julian then.
Seraphina looked at him in confusion. "Because you want me to," she answered, as if it had been clear.
"Why should I?"
"To answer some questions?"
He shook his head and gazed at nowhere. "I don't have any question."
"Oh," she said, seemed thinking about something. "Alright then. The truth is people sometimes searching for answers in his dreams. If you do not want to ask any question, I will leave."
"Wait," said Julian automatically when Seraphina was about to stand up.
She tried to hide her smile before returning to her position again. "So what is your question?" she asked casually.
Julian took a deep breath once again. He didn't feel like he was curious about something, but in fact he was alarmed when Seraphina threatened to leave. Perhaps he did have some questions? In his sub-consciousness?
Because he didn't really know where to start, he began with a random thing.
"What is it like to say goodbye?"
Something was flying in the air, and it was the mixture of fireflies and butterflies. Both Julian and Seraphina gazed on them for a while before she began to talk.
"What is it like to say goodbye?" she smiled slightly, her eyes were gleaming, reflecting the river which was now turning into silver. "Just like a flower leaving a butterfly."
"A butterfly leaving a flower, you mean?"
"No. A flower leaving a butterfly," she gazed on him. "A flower which is dead, leaving a butterfly living from its stamen. I imagine it withering, unwilling to leave both the world and the butterfly. But it has to, because there will be a better place waiting for it."
"What does it feel?"
She smiled. "Undefined. That what it's like to say goodbye."
There was a pause, and the clouds began to drip some rainfalls. Bizarrely, neither Julian nor Seraphina felt any dampness.
"What is it like to love someone?"
Seraphina closed her eyes softly before looking at him again.
"To love someone is to become a rainfall."
"Meaning?"
"Sometimes it falls hard enough to cast a neverending flood. Sometimes it's just falling light enough to be called as a shower. But it will turn into a rainbow eventually."
"I still don't understand."
"You can replace rainfall with tears. And rainbow with tranquility. Shedding too much tears to catch tranquility. That what it's like to love someone."
A pause again, and they heard a melody coming in the air, calm and gentle as the surface of a cotton. At the same time, for some reason Julian felt peaceful with the presence of his companion.
"What is it like to be happy?" he asked again.
"Why? You never feel happy?"
"Not your business."
"Of course it is my business. A certain deity that once lived in my vessel is living on you now."
"Did you enjoy the presence of that certain deity?" he sneered.
"Not in the least. But becoming his vessel made me realize on how things going on in the heart of you, the Olympians."
"How are things going on, then?"
"Greed," she answered. There was no warmth in her eyes right now. Instead, it was filled with hatred. Almost the same with her stare hundred years ago, somewhere in Atlantis, in which Poseidon used her as a container. "Gluttony. Arrogance," she stared emptily at Julian. "No happiness."
They gazed on each other.
"What is it like to be happy, then?" he asked once more. No change in his tone, but clearly he became more interested in this subject than before.
"To get the meaning of happiness is to get the meaning of sadness. Have you felt any sadness, Julian?"
"No."
"Then your question is pointless."
"Be nice. You've answered my previous questions. Do you think I've had any experience of saying goodbye? Or do you think I'm in love with someone? Be realistic. I've never felt any of them. And happiness, certainly I've never felt it, if your definition of happiness is the opposite of sadness. And I've never felt sadness at all. I just want you to give me some image as before. What is it like to be happy? Or," he frowned. "Do you never feel happy?"
"I've been happy all my life," she whispered, "because I've been sad all my life."
He watched her twisting some stems of flowers which were suddenly popped in her hands.
"That's what is like to be happy," she said. "To see some light in the flood of sadness."
He took a deep breath. The melody was still floating in their ambience, a touch of sound inside the substantial silence.
"Now, Julian, may I ask you a question?" she asked after the rainfall had stopped.
"What?"
"Why did you ask these questions?"
The reason had been blurry, but now that Seraphina's answers had been locked in his thought, he could easily come into an understanding.
"Nothing," he said. "I just need to know what's so special about humanity. And why Athena treasures it. Clearly, human is the weirdest creature of all," he looked at her. "And you. You're one of it."
"Yes."
"You died with humanly smile on your face. Does it mean you're willing to release the divine power only for the sake of becoming a human? Do you prefer living in uncertainty: getting those undefined feelings when saying goodbye, suffering when falling in love, feeling happy in the middle of sadness?"
"Being a human is not bad at all. And I won't call those mixture feelings uncertainties. I call it harmony." She painstakingly listened to the melody, and smiled in warmth as she always did. "Just like this song."
"Well," Julian at last stood up, brushing his white suit and his blue hair which were full of powder—its origin remained a mystery. "I guess it's enough for today. I'll come back to the living world."
"Be careful," she gazed on the river, eyes filled with hopes. "Send my regards to Athena's saints."
"Like hell I will."
She laughed, he turned around to leave her. But even when he forced himself to be stiff and cold, he couldn't help to smile slightly as well.
When he was about to enter the gate of consciousness, he stopped, and turned at her again with a frown on his forehead. He found her still sitting beside the river.
"Why you look so vivid now?" he asked. "What makes you?"
"Because you need my answers so bad," she said, glancing at him. "I know your story."
"Really?"
"You plan to launch a catastrophe again."
He didn't answer.
"Yet, deep in your heart you don't really want to. You need to find a reason to stop your plan. You need to know why human don't deserve to be destroyed," she smiled. "Believe me, Julian. Your plan will never work. I bet you a thousand rubles. Besides, the world won't be too interesting without the presence of your enemies."
"You're pretty smart for a woman who lived two hundred years ago."
"Thanks to my library."
And with that, Julian Solo woke up.
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A week later, she appeared in his dream again. Solid, silver-haired and blue-dressed as usual. Only she didn't sit beside the river. She sat on a crescent moon, gazing at the flood of the stars.
Because it was his dream, Julian managed to produce another crescent moon and had a comfortable seat as well.
"A thousand rubles," he gave her his money.
Her eyes sparkled like the stars in her surroundings. She received it and gave him her truest gratitude.
"And so," she said then. "Do you need to ask another question?"
"Yes. But I need to think of it first." He took a deep breath and laid his back on the moon, closing his eyes. When he opened them again, he found Seraphina made some paper yachts with the money.
"Seraphina."
"Hm?"
He looked at her for a while, smiled slightly, and closed his eyes once more. "Can I stay here for a while?"
"Sure," she smiled. "It's not too bad, isn't it, to have a secret consultant?"
"You call it consultant. I call it elder sister."
"I'm not a Solo. I'm a Gracia."
"But you're the former Poseidon's vessel."
"Do you think I want to?"
In the middle of the scattering stars they kept talking and making some paper yachts.
Clearly, wandering inside a dream would be his next hobby. Creating a mess with the flood would still be number one, though.
But for now, it wasn't really essential.
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