Disclaimer: Dragon Ball, Dragon Ball Z and Dragon Ball GT are all owned by Funimation, Toei Animation, Fuji TV and Akira Toriyama.

Prologue Part 1: Death Of A Hero

Son Goku´s House

Goku's body lay in bed, his expression finally relaxed after many days of fighting the deadly heart virus, to no avail... The kind Saiyan had left an important void in the universe with his final breath, it had all come to a quiet and tragic end.

Gohan ran home as fast as he could, he first noticed Oolong and Puar as he quickly ran past them and all his friends, all of them filled with solemn looks on their faces. Baby Trunks' cry was the only sound that filled the air, as if he too could perceive the overwhelming tragedy of the occasion.

Gohan burst into the room where his father had been fighting a losing battle to the heart virus, simply seeing his mother sobbing over his father's peaceful body left him speechless. He could only stand there, everything frozen around him; he was completely overtaken in disbelief that his father's strong and noble heart had truly succumbed to the lethal virus.

"I'm so sorry honey" his mother spoke. She proceeded to attempt to embrace her son, only for him to run out without saying a word.

Gohan ignored his mother's attempt to hug him, running out as fast as he could, taking flight from his house at full speed. He wasn´t going anywhere in particular, he just wanted to get away from the place where his world had just fallen apart.

Gohan was crying erratically, he could not comprehend how such a kind and noble man like his father could have died in such a horrible way.

"Why him? It's just not fair!" Gohan screamed to the skies, abruptly landing and forming a massive crater next to a waterfall, lightning struck behind him as the sky clouded and went dark, his power rising to previously unseen levels. His light blue aura started flickering a vibrant gold, his eyes flashed from onyx to teal, his hair stood up, and changing color to gold. Suddenly, the aura fully consumed him, as he finished the transformation into the legendary state of Super Saiyan.

Gohan's realization of his ascension made him come to believe he was in a dream, that if he managed to wake up, his father would still be alive and well. He was in complete disbelief of what he was experiencing, had he truly done it? Was his ascension even possible? He did not have much time to think about his achievement, since his vision went blurry, and then completely dark. He immediately lost consciousness from the sheer amount of power and emotion required to trigger the transformation, clearly demonstrating his young body was not prepared for the Super Saiyan transformation.

Vegeta, now the prince of a dead race, was in no better condition. His rival, the only full-blooded Saiyan left apart from him was gone, his race was now truly extinguished in his eyes, after all, he was the only one left. He sat at the edge of a lake, lamenting the fact that he would never have a chance to settle the score with Goku, this tragedy was ironic somehow, as he had achieved the Super Saiyan transformation just a few weeks ago, and as fate would have it, Goku would fall sick to the heart virus, putting their decisive battle on hold once again. Little did he know back then, their battle would once again be delayed for much longer than he could have imagined... Vegeta's thoughts were brought to an abrupt end, as he sensed a huge rise in power; he recognized the energy to be coming from Kakarot's half-breed spawn.

"What is that boy doing? He's going to destroy the whole planet if he keeps this up!" Vegeta said aloud to himself as he quickly powered up into his Super Saiyan form, and flew as fast as he could towards Gohan.

"Kakarot's son... could it be? Is it even possible for him to ascend at such a young age? He's a mere child!" Vegeta questioned himself, wondering if it was really possible for such a thing to be happening as he sped towards the immense power that was clearly emanating from Gohan.

Piccolo had left the Son residence as soon as he had sensed Goku's ki fade away, but not before paying his respects to his old rival, ally and friend. He tried meditating in a useless effort to block the situation out of his head; his plans were immediately changed as he noticed Gohan flying away at full speed towards the mountains.

Vegeta could sense Gohan's energy, he knew how a Super Saiyan's ki felt and the boy had clearly attained the state. From the distance, he could see the golden aura shooting up to the skies, with thunder being the only appropriate response the planet could give to the massive energy output it was receiving. Vegeta stared in awe as the boy finished his transformation.

"Well Kakarot, you've left us quite a legacy; your son is a Super Saiyan... I hope you're proud, because I'm not sure your death was a worthy price to pay for the brat's ascension." Vegeta said to himself. His eyes widened as he sensed a dramatic drop in Gohan's energy.

"I knew it, the boy is too young, and the power could destroy his body if he doesn't stop!" just as Vegeta guessed, Gohan's body wasn't ready for the transformation. Vegeta caught Gohan by his collar before he fell into the crater. Vegeta descended from his own transformation and prepared himself to take flight right as he felt another strong ki approaching.

"Well, I'm surprised he didn't get here sooner..." Vegeta commented to himself.

Piccolo landed next to Vegeta, a look of surprise and anguish on his face.

"That energy... It's unmistakable, has he really done it?" Vegeta simply nodded and threw Gohan's limp body at Piccolo, who caught it and slung his small body over his shoulder.

Vegeta turned and flew away without even looking at the Namek.

"I don't believe it! I finally attain the legendary state—my birthright as Prince of All Saiyans—feared across the entire universe as the greatest warrior to ever exist! A Super Saiyan... yet fate dares to laugh at my achievement, killing off the only reason I beat my body to near death day after day just to reach the goal. I am no warrior and I shall never fight again." with this declaration, the proud Prince of Saiyans was no more.

Vegeta landed in front of the Capsule Corp. building. A single idea filled his mind, his room was the only thing he wanted to see. He didn't want a single word to be spoken to him, solitude was the only thing he desired.

Piccolo flew slowly, he felt bad for his young pupil, he was too young. He would make sure he supervised the kid every single day from now on, just to make sure he wouldn't hurt himself. Goku had told him of some side effects the transformation had caused before he was able to control it, and Piccolo knew it would be much worse on Gohan's small body. He landed in front of the Son household. Chi-Chi ran out, her eyes swollen from crying.

"Where's my baby?!" she demanded. Piccolo might have been annoyed had he not known all she had been through today. He didn't exactly like her, and honestly found her quite annoying, but he had sympathy for her loss.

"He's right here, make sure he gets a lot of rest and feed him plenty of food as soon as he wakes up, even more than usual. Trust me when I tell you he'll need it." Piccolo advised her on how to take care of Gohan.

"What happened to him, he's so hot, does he have a fever?" Chi-Chi questioned.

Piccolo did not want to tell her of Gohan's ascension, but it was necessary if she was to take proper care of him.

"Listen to me Chi-Chi, your son, he..." Piccolo paused, which made Chi-Chi even more anxious.

"Tell me already! What happened to my little boy?" Chi-Chi demanded.

Sighing, he replied solemnly "Your son, is a Super Saiyan..."

Chi-Chi froze—her face expressionless—all that crossed her mind was the trauma her poor son had been through.

Prologue Part 2: Life Continues

Capsule Corp.

Vegeta's routine since Goku's death a month ago had been simple enough, lock himself in his room, watch TV all day and go downstairs three times a day to be fed an abundant amount of food by Bulma's overly-cheery mother.

He had completely abandoned any semblance of training he had ever done. Bulma was too busy taking care of baby Trunks, and even then she still tried to speak to the stubborn Prince, but it was useless.

He'd barely spoken a word to anyone since Goku's death, and he didn't plan to for a while. In fact, he didn't even know why he was still on Earth. Was it his son? Was it that annoying woman he had somehow copulated with in between training sessions? He didn't know, and frankly he didn't really care.

He had no ambitions, nothing to chase after. He was the strongest warrior on Earth; his pride had been severely cut down, and never had a chance to heal.

"Damn that third-class fool, killed by a mere virus and not by my hand! He's probably up there having the time of his life, while I'm in this pathetic planet standing around like a bad joke! How dare he humiliate me yet again?" Vegeta clenched his fists so hard they nearly bled, but no physical injury could possibly compare to the attack on his pride.

Son Goku's House

Chi-Chi was cooking a huge meal for her son, since his appetite had increased surprisingly even for a Saiyan after his transformation. She had become even more protective of her son after Goku's death, never letting him out of her sight for too long and never allowing him to leave the house without explicit permission.

Gohan reminded her of Goku, and it hurt her terribly, but she was a good mother and she wasn't going to let anything get in the way of raising her son.

Piccolo had stayed close to the Son residence, meditating in a nearby tree. He needed to be there just in case Gohan had another sudden surge of power and needed to be controlled, Chi-Chi was much more accepting of his presence, since that was one of Goku's wishes while he lay on his deathbed.

Three Days Before Goku's Death

Goku had been asleep for 2 days straight and Chi-Chi was more worried than ever, all she wanted was to have her husband back in good health with his cheery smile and happy attitude. She lay sobbing on his chest when she felt a small movement. Her eyes widened in surprise.

"Goku? Are you awake?" she asked in a worried tone.

"I'm… awake Chi-Chi" he replied in a weak voice. He proceeded to attempt to stand up, only to fall back on the bed from the sheer pain in his chest.

"Don't move Goku, you have to rest."

He offered her a weak smile and spoke in a solemn voice "Listen babe, I don't think I have much left in me, it's kinda' funny too, I always thought if I ever went down it would be in a fight, not in bed like this..." he laughed weakly but stopped before the pain got any worse.

"Don't say that Goku, you're going to be fine, you're stronger than that stupid virus!" she screamed desperately.

"Honestly, I wish I was, but I guess even a Super Saiyan can't fight this." he whispered.

Before she could reply, he focused on a more pressing matter in his head. "Listen Chi, I need you to pay attention, this is very important, I hope you'll understand." Goku said in as serious a tone as he could manage in his condition.

"Of course, what is it?" Chi-Chi replied curiously.

"It's about Piccolo..." Goku decided he should go straight to the point.

Chi-Chi's eyes widened, she should have figured he would bring this up eventually.

"What about him?" she asked in a mildly annoyed tone.

"I know he may not show it very much, but he really has changed since I defeated him in the World Martial Arts Tournament, please Chi, give him a chance, he really does care about Gohan, he nearly died protecting both me and Gohan from Frieza back on Namek, he's like a father to Gohan, please... don't take that... away from him." Goku's voice trailed off as he fell unconscious.

Chi-Chi started crying again, "I promise... I'll give him a chance honey." she said in between sobs.

End Flashback

Gohan had been studying more than ever, not only because of his mother, but because it helped him get his mind off his father's death. As far as Gohan knew his transformation into a Super Saiyan had been no more than a mere dream, and he wondered if he could really reach that level of power.

Piccolo had made it very clear to Chi-Chi that he should not learn what had happened that day, and that they should just allow him to wake up in his bed with the story that he had fainted after his father died.

Gohan didn't suspect anything and decided to focus more on the increasing amount of chores he would have to deal with now that his father was missing. Gohan had just gotten done inhaling a mountain of food and proceeded to continue studying.

Capsule Corp.

"Vegeta! I know you're in there, let me in already!" Bulma called out for what must have been the twentieth time. Baby Trunks had just been put to bed and she decided she should speak with Vegeta. She knew there probably wasn't anything she could do for him even if she actually got a chance to speak with him in the first place.

Vegeta sighed, this time she clearly wasn't going to leave so easily. ´When this woman sets her mind on something, she never lets it go, what makes her so annoyingly persistent?´ he said in his mind as he reluctantly got up and headed towards the door at a sluggish pace.

"What?" he asked in an irritated tone.

"You haven't done anything in the whole month, what's wrong with you?" she asked in a worried tone, even though she could already guess what had him in such a pitiful state.

"Woman, do not belittle me with your pity! I am perfectly fine, there is no need for you to worry about me." Vegeta spat the words out like venom, clearly hurting Bulma.

"But Vege —"

"Do me a favor and mind your own business, my well-being is of no concern to you! Good night." with that he slammed the door in her face, leaving her alone in the hallway.

"What am I going to do with him? He's completely broken after Goku's death..." she said in a sad tone as she walked away defeated to her room.

Prologue Part 3: Believe In Yourself Son

It had been four months since Goku's soul had departed from the Earth, and the lack of his presence was clearly still being felt by the mourning Z-fighters.

Chi-Chi went to bed crying every night, with the strong arms of her husband no longer being there to warm her in the cold of the night. Gohan trained in any possible way he could —with his father gone —he realized he had to grow stronger to protect the Earth from any threats that might attack it just like his father had done so many times before him.

Even with Vegeta apparently on their side he couldn't rely on the strength of others alone, he was basically the man of the house now, handling all the chores his father used to do plus his studies and whatever training he could sneak in.

It was a lot of work for a young boy but the pride in knowing he was his father's son kept him going. Bulma had repeatedly attempted to talk with Vegeta, but she was either completely ignored or brushed aside if she got too persistent, which was usually the case.

One day however, Bulma decided it had been long enough for the mourning Z-fighters and that she should get them all together for a little party at Capsule Corp. She had sent invitations to Chi-Chi, Krillin, Yamcha, Tien and Master Roshi. Chi-Chi brought Gohan while Piccolo came with them, Yamcha brought Puar, Krillin came alone since he had just broken up with his previous girlfriend Maron, and Master Roshi came with Oolong. Vegeta had stayed in his room like he had done for the past few months and Piccolo simply stood in a corner meditating.

Meanwhile all the Z-fighters were having a good time; they talked, ate and frequently teased Krillin about his break-up. After a few hours everyone looked up in surprise as Vegeta came downstairs and the atmosphere became immediately tense.

"Well, has his royal highness actually come to grace us with his presence?" Bulma said jokingly in an attempt to lower the tension. She knew Vegeta was no longer a threat to Earth and tried to show her trust in him to the other Z-fighters, who justifiably remained tense anyways.

"Do not test me woman, I am not here for you weaklings," Vegeta replied in a serious tone.

"Well excuse me, but how many times do I have to tell you my name is BULMA!" She shouted, clearly annoyed by the way he treated her. Vegeta ignored her and immediately got down to business.

"Boy," He pointed at Gohan. "Follow me."

"There is absolutely no way my boy is going alone with you Vegeta!" Chi-Chi shouted angrily.

"Mom, it's okay, I'll be fine, Vegeta hasn't harmed anyone for years, and though I don't know if he's changed completely, I do know he isn't a bad guy anymore," Gohan replied, confident in his words about Vegeta.

"You know I don't like this at all Gohan, but if you truly believe what you're saying, I can allow you a few minutes with him." Chi-Chi replied, though it was obvious by her tone that she was still worried.

"Thank you mom, I promise I'll be fine." Gohan replied in an attempt to stop his mother from worrying, though he knew it couldn't be helped.

"If my boy doesn't come back in one piece, I WILL have your head Vegeta!" Chi-Chi shouted threateningly.

"Do as you please woman." he said as he turned and started walking, motioning for Gohan to follow him.

"Where are we going Vegeta?"

"Gravity Room." Vegeta replied simply. The Prince obviously wasn't into conversation and Gohan took notice of this, avoiding any further questions. As they walked through the halls of the massive Capsule Corp. Gohan wondered why Vegeta wanted to speak to him, as far as Gohan knew he hadn't really spoken to anyone in the past months and his sudden interest in him was surprising to say the least.

'Maybe it's because I'm the only Saiyan left apart from him.' Gohan pondered this possibility and many others until they finally reached the Gravity Room. Vegeta came in and Gohan followed close behind, eager to find out why Vegeta had brought him here of all places.

"Gohan, you and I are the only Saiyans left; I want to see how much progress you've made since the battle with Frieza and his father." Vegeta said. Gohan's eyes widened at Vegeta's request. 'Hadn't he given up on fighting and training after my father died?'

"But Vegeta, why would you of all people care how strong I am? I thought you'd given up on fighting." He immediately regretted his question as a blow struck his face and he landed on his back a few feet away.

"What was that all about?" Gohan asked in a mix of surprise and anger.

"Get up." Vegeta simply responded as he crossed arms over his chest.

"I'm not going to fight you Vegeta!" Gohan shouted back.

"So be it, it's your call boy, fight or die." Vegeta replied nonchalantly as a ball of ki formed in his hand and he fired it at Gohan.

Gohan jumped up, barely dodging the blast that was fired at him. He immediately charged Vegeta, aiming a kick at his face. Vegeta disappeared and elbowed Gohan in the back, slamming him on the floor. Gohan quickly turned around and fired an energy blast point-blank at Vegeta's face who jumped back and swatted it away.

"I was honestly expecting more from Kakarot's son, what a disappointment." Vegeta mocked.

Gohan's eyes widened, his aura suddenly flared around him and a determined look settled in his face, he quickly rushed Vegeta in a flurry of punches and kicks.

"That's more like it boy!" Vegeta shouted as he uncrossed his arms, actually having to block some of Gohan's blows, which were quickly increasing in speed and strength. Gohan stepped back and charged a kick, aiming straight at Vegeta's face who barely managed to block the blow with his forearm —the attack was surprisingly strong —the blow resounding across the entire room.

'It's just as I thought, his power level has grown much faster due to his transformation into a Super Saiyan, he clearly can't use the power yet, but I'm sure if I push him enough he can summon it once again.' Vegeta thought to himself as a plan quickly formed in his head.

"Well Vegeta, what do you think, had enough?" Gohan asked proudly as he and Vegeta appeared to be closely matched.

"Not even close brat, let's see how you stand up to a Super Saiyan." Vegeta yelled as he flared his ki higher, his hair and aura shifting to a vibrant gold.

"Are you insane, what are you doing!?" Gohan shouted as panic surged inside him.

"I hope you're ready for this Gohan, because if you're not, then you can kiss your planet and all your friends goodbye!" Vegeta rose into the air, bright blue energy started forming in his outstretched palm.

"Oh no, he's really going to do it! I have to do something!" Gohan cried desperately as he cupped his hands together at his side, beginning to form his father's signature move.

"Ka-Me-Ha-Me..." Gohan began focusing all his energy into the bright blue ball of energy between his hands.

"The lives of all your friends depend on this very moment Gohan! Will you stop me, or will your weakness be the death of everyone you've ever cared for?" Vegeta said as he readied himself to launch his attack.

"BIG BANG ATTACK!" Vegeta shouted as he released his strongest attack.

"-HAAAAAA!" Gohan screamed as he released the Kamehameha which collided with the blue ball of energy. Gohan gritted his teeth as Vegeta's attack slowly overpowered his Kamehameha.

"No, all my friends, I have to protect them, but... I'm too weak…" Gohan said to himself as he slowly gave up hope. However, the memory of his father suddenly reinvigorated him as he remembered their last conversation...

November, Age 766 A Few Hours Before Goku's death

"Daddy?" Gohan asked as Goku slowly opened his eyes and greeted his son with a weak smile.

"Hey there Gohan," Goku said weakly.

"Mom said you wanted to talk to me about something very important, what is it dad?" Gohan asked innocently.

"Listen Gohan, even though you're really young, you're probably smarter than me in most ways."

"Thanks Daddy, I try to study really hard for you and Mommy." Gohan replied proudly.

"I know that Gohan, and you have no idea how proud it makes me to know that you are my son. It's because of how smart you are that I'm sure you'll be able to understand what I have to tell you right now. I... don't have much left in me." Goku said in a weak and sad voice.

"Are you saying you're going to... NO, NO, NO!" Gohan began sobbing.

"Listen Gohan, you have to be strong, for me and for your mother!" Goku said, his tone slightly raised despite the intense pain it caused him.

"But I'm just a little kid... how can I?" Gohan asked without any trace of confidence in himself.

"You may not realize this yet Gohan, but you are really strong, you can do whatever you set your mind to, you just have to believe in yourself son." Goku said, pride and confidence in his weak voice.

"Do you really think that father?"

"I know that Gohan, I believe in you— I always will, you just have to believe in yourself son."

"Okay dad, I promise I'll do my best, thank you." Gohan said softly, though his voice was beaming with newly-gained confidence.

"One more thing Gohan, please accept Vegeta, he hasn't harmed anyone in years and I'm sure he'll be there to protect the Earth just like you will. He may look like your enemy, but I truly believe he's a changed man, maybe Bulma set him straight or something," Goku said with a weak laugh. Gohan laughed too, but his face became serious again as his father was clearly close to passing out.

"I love you dad."

"I love you too Gohan, take care of your mother for me, stay strong and don't... stop studying." Goku smiled as his eyes closed for what would be the last time. He was still breathing however, so Gohan still had some hope that his father would pull through.

"I promise I won't let you down father." Gohan said as he wiped the tears from his cheeks.

End Flashback

"My father believed in me and I won't let him down!" Gohan shouted as he poured more energy into his Kamehameha. Vegeta's eyes widened as Gohan's energy skyrocketed.

'That's it kid, just a little more should do it!'

"I can do this, I just need... MORE POWER!" Gohan yelled as his aura started changing to gold and his eyes flickered green.

'Amazing…' Vegeta thought as he uncrossed his arms and readied himself to stop the rebound that was sure to come.

"This is for you father!" Gohan shouted as he transformed into a Super Saiyan and poured all his power into the Kamehameha. The Big Bang Attack and Gohan's Kamehameha both struck Vegeta directly and an explosion filled the room with smoke.

As the smoke cleared, Vegeta was still standing. His Super Saiyan aura rippled around him; his armor was damaged in several parts and his gloves burned from the pressure of the attacks. A small, nearly imperceptible smile showed on the Prince´s face while Gohan struggled to control his transformation.

"You have to calm down if you want to control it Gohan." Vegeta advised; he was proud of Gohan, even if he wouldn't admit it. Gohan let out a deep breath as he fell to his knees and his transformation faded, he was panting heavily.

"Don't stress yourself boy, go ahead and rest, this battle is over." Vegeta sighed and let go of his own transformation. He walked back to the others as Gohan followed him with some difficulty.

Vegeta walked past everyone and jogged upstairs to his room, ignoring Bulma's attempt to take him to the infirmary. Chi-Chi immediately hugged Gohan, whose clothes and hands had been burned after the energy struggle.

Piccolo hadn't allowed anyone close to the Gravity Room as he knew exactly what Vegeta wanted, and he figured it was necessary for Gohan to fight him if he was ever to protect the Earth against a real threat.

"Mom, Piccolo, I'm a Super Saiyan just like my dad!"

"I always hated that hair, but I'm still proud of you Gohan." Chi-Chi said in her usual overly-protective manner.

"I knew you could do it Gohan, I'm really proud of you, I know your father would be too." Piccolo assured him. All his friends congratulated the young Saiyan on his achievement as well.

"Thanks... everyone." Gohan said as his energy finally ran out and he fainted. Bulma immediately rushed him to the infirmary after Chi-Chi freaked out saying she would kill Vegeta. Everyone began laughing, knowing Gohan was just tired and Vegeta hadn't actually harmed him.

Seeing Gohan's display of power, Vegeta returned to his routine of training the following day. Bulma found herself overjoyed that he was finally doing something even if he was still ignoring her. She knew she could now make some progress with him as he would HAVE to talk to her when he messed up the Gravity Mechanism in a huge display of power.

Gohan's training was even more intense now that he knew he was a Super Saiyan, both he and Piccolo would benefit from the harder training. Chi-Chi allowed him a few more hours of training since he was already two grades ahead of the other children his age. The Earth seemed to be living a prosperous era after Goku's death. Little did they know a new evil the likes of which their galaxy had never seen before was soon to be unleashed on their small planet. Will the Z-Fighters have what it takes to protect the Earth against this new threat?

Hello everyone, I hope you all enjoyed the prologue. Next chapter we are finally getting down to the main plot. This was the first fight scene I've ever written so go ahead and tell me what you thought about it and how I can improve in a review. Also, if you have a question go ahead and ask in a review as all questions will be answered in the latest chapter. The sections with Vegeta were a true joy to write and I hope you enjoy reading them.

C- I love it. Will movie characters make an appearance or will this go straight to Android saga?

R- Thanks for your review. Movie characters will definitely make an appearance. Cooler and Android 13 have already been defeated before Goku's death. We'll see what characters appear from Broly onwards.

C- I've got to say, I'm a big fan of Bringer Of Death, Honor Trip, Break Through The Limit, and Dragon Ball Legends. By what I've seen so far, your story could end up becoming just as good :D I hope you update regularly :)

R- Thank you very much for your review. I really am trying to deliver a quality reading experience and I can only hope to reach the quality of the fanfics you mentioned, thank you for your support.

C- Great story and interesting concept, I like the twist of Gohan going super as I always thought that Goku's death would be traumatic enough for Gohan to go super. Looking forward to how events will unfold without Goku around and how well Gohan, Vegeta and Piccolo will step up to the plate.

I've enjoyed the different perspectives of all the characters and I like the idea of incorporating some of the movie villains into this story (always thought Broly was a great villain, he's just so insanely powerful and insane, I bet he'll just focus on Gohan due to the resemblance to Kakarot), hopefully without his father around Gohan can grow into the saviour/protector he always should've been with the help of Vegeta and Piccolo (I always thought Gohan didn't grasp his full potential because he always thought his father would save him and his belief that he never could be stronger or better than his father).

Until the next one.

R- Thank you very much for your review, I'm glad you like the story and I hope you'll like what I have in store for the next few chapters. As for Broly, that will be a VERY interesting fight. I just can't reveal too much at this moment.

C- This story seems like it's going to be pretty good. I like the concept keep up the good work

R- I appreciate your support, thank you very much! I hope you continue to enjoy the story.

C-This is interesting. My only comment is that you switched POV a lot. While it was helpful to see a little bit of everyone, it was a bit harder to get into the characters' heads and feel what they were feeling. There just wasn't really time. Of course, that's just my opinion. Anyways, other than that, the plot looks solid. The characters also look solid from what I saw and this looks like it will be a good story. Nicely done!-D101

R- Thank you for your support and advice, I hope you continue to enjoy the story.

C- This is a good start, I'm look forward to where you're taking this! Keep up the good work!

R- Thank you very much for the first review, I appreciate your support.