ON A TALL AND DARK CANVAS
"How long has this been going on?" Logan asked very slowly.
There was a computer in Logan's office, but everyone was pretty sure it only saw a little use. In fact, whenever Hank upgraded the school's computers, he always saved Logan's office for last. Logan never complained. Sometimes, Hank wasn't sure if Logan even noticed the difference.
But at the moment, Logan was sitting at his desk and staring fixedly at his computer monitor. It was difficult to judge the expression on his face - even for those who had known him for years. However, it mostly seemed to be total shock compounded with utter amazement and overlaid with a dangerous illusion of stoicism.
Bobby frowned thoughtfully. "Well, fanfiction has been around for a while. Most people say it started with 'Star Trek'. Stories would be typed-up, mimeographed, and handed around at conventions. So... something like 45 or 50 years?"
"But the Internet really made it take off," Jubes supplied helpfully. "In the modern day, anybody can write just about anything and find a place to post it."
Logan didn't respond. He just kept staring at the monitor. From the flicker of his eyes, it was obvious that he was reading something.
There was a long silence as Logan continued reading. Bobby, Jubes, and Ororo gave each other worried looks. Shogo was half-asleep in Jubes' arms. He was the only one who didn't seem particularly concerned.
Logan finally spoke again. "That girl I told you about - Kamala Khan - y'know, the new Ms. Marvel? She said something about writing fanfiction. It was supposed to be about me and Ororo fighting space monsters. So I decided to see what it was about."
Jubes nodded immediately. "Yeah, I tracked that story down after you mentioned it. She needs some experience, but your friend is really pretty good. Actually, she mostly writes 'Avengers' fiction. The longest thing she's done so far is an 'Avengers' and 'My Little Pony' crossover."
Logan cocked his head in Jubes direction. "What the hell is a 'My Little Pony'?"
Jubes opened her mouth, paused as she realized that no explanation she could possibly give would make any sense to Logan, and then replied, "It doesn't matter. Look, Logan, this stuff is mostly harmless."
"I've never heard of 'My Little Pony'! Never! I have no idea what it is!" Bobby suddenly blurted out to nobody in particular. There was some sweat on his face.
Everyone ignored him.
"If I'm using Hank's fancy custom search engine right," Logan grated, "there are 13,587 stories out there on the Internet where Scott and I are screwing each other."
Ororo made a sound that was halfway between a choke and a chuckle. Logan gave Ororo a hard look.
"Logan... we all know that is not true," Ororo said with the straightest of straight faces.
"And there are 11,292 stories where Steve Rogers and I are love-birds," Logan added.
Nobody said anything.
"Well?!" Logan exploded.
"I am sorry, Logan," Ororo pointed out patiently - and still with an absolutely straight face, "but I haven't known Steve as long or as well as I have known Scott. I cannot say anything about the nature of your relationship."
Logan closed his eyes and sat very still as Ororo tried not to smile, and Bobby and Jubes frantically fought down giggles.
Logan eventually opened his eyes. The sort-of giggles sort-of vanished.
Logan looked very specifically at Bobby and Jubes, "Have you two ever written this stuff? Somehow it strikes me as your kind of thing."
"Nope! No!" Bobby and Jubes lied from the lying depths of their lie-filled souls. They both looked as bright and innocent as children at their first communion.
"You're both lying from the lying depths of your lie-filled souls," Logan told them flatly.
Bobby and Jubes were unable to meet Logan's eyes. Jubes tried to look innocently indignant, but failed.
"Logan," Ororo interrupted - thus earning undying gratitude from the two younger people. "I understand that this is a shock to you. But this sort of thing is simply a part of the modern world."
"And Kamala doesn't write the adult kind of stuff," Jubes added hurriedly. "It's mostly adventure-romance stuff. In her stories, you and Ororo do a lot of very passionate kissing. Sometimes there's a fade to black. She's doesn't have a single fic that's rated higher then PG - and that's only because of the occasional cuss-word."
Leaning back in his chair, Logan let out a long, deep, breath. Then he ran his hands through his hair and made an honest effort to relax.
"Okay..." he said. "It's crazy. But the twenty-first century is filled with crazy."
Ororo smiled encouragingly.
Logan looked at Ororo. "There are three stories where you and Joe Biden are lovers."
Ororo's smile got a little shaky.
"Just the thought of that made me consider homicide," Logan added. "And maybe suicide."
Ororo smile became more sure. Then she put an arm around Logan's shoulders. "That is very sweet, Logan, but these stories are just words."
Logan nodded. "Yep. You're right, darlin'. It's mostly just kids fooling around. Besides, it's not like..."
Suddenly, Logan stopped.
"Like what?" Bobby asked warily.
"Nothing," Logan said with a broad shrug, his face expressionless.
Bobby and Jubes exchanged suspicious looks.
Among the instructors at the school, the code phrase for "having sex in the showers" was "reviewing the curriculum".
Logan and Ororo had been reviewing the curriculum for most of the evening. That gave Bobby and Jubes time to conspire.
"What do you suppose Logan was about to say?" Bobby wondered.
"I don't know..." Jubes replied hesitantly as she bounced Shogo on her knee.
Bobby chewed on his lower lip. "Maybe it's none of our business?"
Jubes gave Bobby a disgusted look. "Of course it's none of our business! But that doesn't mean we aren't going to check it out! So stark hacking!"
"How do you know that it's computer related?" Bobby asked.
"Because this started with Ms. Marvel's fanfiction! And that reminded Logan of something. So there's some kind of connection to the internet."
Bobby looked dubious. "That sounds iffy, but I'll give it a try."
Logan wasn't exactly good at computer security. So it took no time at all for Bobby to establish a list of web-sites that he frequented. Most of them were about beer and girls. There were also a few historically-oriented web-sites. It turned out that Logan was pretty interested in the history of World War II and the Cold War - and especially Canada's role in those conflicts.
"Bo-rrrring," Jubes sulked as she scanned the printout Bobby had handed her.
"See the second site from the top?" Bobby asked dryly.
"You mean the busty redheads site?" Jubes laughed. "Really, Bobby, you're surprised by that?"
Bobby tried another tack. "Okay, whatever. Take a look at the sites on the bottom of the list."
"Hmm. Japanese..." Jubes muttered thoughtfully.
Then Jubes suddenly winced. "Uh-oh... maybe that's bad. The Japanese do weird and kinky like nobody else does weird and kinky."
Bobby sighed. "They're poetry sites, Jubilation."
The surprised look on Jubes' face was moderately awesome. "Poetry?" she mused.
"Poetry," Bobby repeated.
"Logan reads poetry?!" Jubes suddenly half-yelled in amazement. Shogo started and looked at her in surprise.
"Shhh!" Bobby shushed.
"I've known him for years and I didn't know he was into poetry!" Jubes sputtered in outrage.
Shogo just shook his head and closed his eyes.
Adults were weird.
Bobby and Jubes were pretty frustrated.
"Japanese to English translator programs have always been iffy," Bobby said as he disgustedly tossed a printout onto a pile of other printouts. "But this is ridiculous. It's just random syllables."
"This shouldn't be that much of a problem," Jubes replied with a thoughtful frown.
"Well, yeah, but the bottom line is that the technical approach isn't working."
Jubes nodded. "We need to get somebody to translate for us."
Bobby sighed and rubbed his eyes. "Well... we can't ask Logan or Hank or Ororo. Kitty and Hisako are too close to Logan. That leaves Noriko as the only remaining Japanese speaker here at the school. We'll have to careful and subtle in how we contact her."
Jubes nodded decisively, and then reached over and picked up the intercom phone.
"NORIKO ASHIDA!" boomed the school intercom, "PLEASE REPORT TO MR. DRAKE'S OFFICE! NORIKO ASHIDA, PLEASE REPORT TO MR. DRAKE'S OFFICE!"
Bobby was staring at Jubes as she put down the phone.
"Jubes! For Pete's sake! Everyone is going to know we talked to her!"
Jubes shook her head as if what Bobby had said was meaningless. "The school is a tiny place, Bobby. There's no way we can talk to a student without people knowing about it. This way, everyone will think it's school business."
Bobby didn't seem convinced.
Noriko frowned at the computer screen.
"I can see why your translator program had trouble, Mr. Drake," she said thoughtfully.
"Why?" Bobby and Jubes asked simultaneously.
Noriko blinked in surprise at their dual intensity before replying, "This web-site is devoted to an old style of poetry that went out of fashion years ago. However, there are those who never gave up on it. And then there are some purists - like the people who post to this site - who only write it in a very old and courtly form of Japanese. It would be something like using Chaucerian English to write in iambic pentameter. That's what confused your translator program."
Bobby was obviously interested in what Noriko was saying. "You know your poetry, Nori."
Noriko shrugged distractedly as she continued to read. "I've always had an interest."
Bobby smiled blandly. The school sometimes had older students teach short seminars on special subjects. Noriko didn't know it, but she was talking herself into teaching a poetry class.
"What's it say?" Jubes asked suddenly - after giving Bobby a deadly look. She wasn't here for a literary lesson.
Noriko nodded her head. "This is the home-page for one of the more popular writers on this web-site. His user name translates as 'WarHorse'. His work is all over the place in terms of content. Sometimes it's introspective writings about duty, honor, violence, and death. If I had to make a guess, I'd say 'WarHorse' is a military man. Sometimes he writes lighter stuff about family and friends. And sometimes... well... sometimes it can be very erotic."
"Can you read some of it to us?" Jubes pressed.
"Something you're comfortable with," Bobby hurriedly amended.
Noriko stared at the screen. "It will lose something in translation."
"Give it your best shot," Jubes said.
Noriko hesitated for a moment, than began slowly speaking.
I have waited long
the return of Lady Fire.
Why has Lady Storm
been so strong, kind, and patient?
Friend, warrior, and lover.
I have never deserved her.
Bobby and Jubes stared at each other in shocked surprise.
"Stop it," Hank said very bluntly as he sat down. The chair creaked piteously.
Bobby and Jubes were in the cafeteria, keeping an eye on the students. Shogo was on a blanket on the floor, playing animatedly with a stuffed animal. A squad of Bamfs were perched on nearby tables. Rumor had it that a food-fight was brewing. Bobby and Jubes were determined to head it off. The Bamfs, on the other hand, were hoping for a free meal.
"Stop what?" Jubes asked distractedly.
"You've discovered Logan's literary secret," Hank said with a sigh. "Which is a very private thing. I'm telling you to let it go."
Bobby gulped. Meanwhile, Jubes put a bland look on her face as she tried to formulate a workable lie.
"What makes you think that we..." Jubes began.
"If it involves computers and happens on this campus, then I know about it," Hank interrupted.
"Damn," Bobby muttered regretfully. Jubes just rolled her eyes.
"Okay," Jubes said irritably. "We know Logan's deepest, darkest, secret. Something he never even told me. He's a poet. Hell, he's been published in Japanese journals and anthologies. He's even won a few awards. But we've already decided that it's none of our business."
Hank glanced at Bobby. Bobby gave him a short and serious nod.
"As far as we're concerned, this never happened," Bobby said.
Hank leaned back and grinned. That involved a lot of very big and very sharp teeth. The Bamfs suddenly got nervous and vanished all at once.
Inspiration is where you found it. The ancient Greeks used to talk about the muses. They were feminine spirits - goddesses, actually - who provided artists and writers with inspiration.
Logan had known a goddess for quite some time. It took him a while to realize that she was also a muse.
Lately, he'd been writing a lot more poetry.
Gloriously naked, Ororo was on Logan's bed, laying on her stomach with her eyes closed. Her head was turned to one side and her cheek was resting on her linked hands. Her ankles were nonchalantly crossed.
Sitting on the bed next to Ororo, Logan was wearing a threadbare kimono. It was older than most of the school faculty.
Logan leaned over and kissed Ororo where her eyebrow met her temple.
Then on the bare side of Ororo's head.
Then on the tip of her ear - and again on her earlobe.
Her eyes still closed, Ororo smiled. "Do not stop," she whispered softly.
Logan slowly ran his hand down Ororo's bare back, his thumb tracing the ridge of her spine. Ororo sighed in pleasure as her back arched sensuously under his touch.
On the nightstand next to the bed was shallow dish of black ink. Logan used one hand to stir a brush in the ink. His other hand was cupping one of Ororo's buttocks.
Logan wiped excess ink from the brush with the lip of the dish and contemplated Ororo's back. Then, starting on Ororo's left shoulder and moving rightward in a razor-straight line, Logan carefully sketched out a sequence of ancient characters. It was the first line of his latest poem.
"What is this one about?" Ororo murmured quietly.
"The first time we made love," Logan replied distantly - keeping most of his attention on his calligraphy. "Right after we joined up with Charles. Behind that burning car."
"We barely knew one another," Ororo said.
"As I recall, at the time we could barely stand one another," Logan chuckled as he began the second line.
"Mutual survival brings out primal instincts," Ororo observed, shivering slightly under the teasing touch of the brush.
"Yeah. One second, we were both going to ground as Magneto threw cars down the street to cover his escape. Then he flew away - and we started tearing off each other's clothes."
Ororo opened her eyes. They were bright and amused. "Will you include the part where Kurt caught us?"
Logan pursed his lips thoughtfully. "Can't skip that! He sent the rest of the team to look for us somewhere else. That gave us the time we needed to get dressed again."
"Kurt is such a gentleman," Ororo said as she closed her eyes again. "The tale would not be complete without that."
Trying to think of a Japanese word that worked for "elf", Logan bought himself some time by leaning over and running his tongue down the small of Ororo's back.
Ororo gasped.