Ferb's Sith Monologue

by jeremy jordan can't dance

After watching the amazing Star Wars Phineas and Ferb episode, I thought to myself, "What if Ferb would've voiced more feelings when he was a Sith?" And BAM, this happened. Ferb is basically messed up from the Sith stuff, so his memories are very truthful, almost too hurtful towards his brother. R&R, oneshot, completed!

The black cloak fell to his shoulders, revealing the horrid black-and-red face beneath it. Yellow eyes glowed with hatred, and the green hair defied all laws of gravity. He glared at the red-haired boy whom he once called "brother," the look on the boy's face a mix of surprise and naïveté.

"Whoa, neat face paint!" He said, and Ferb internally scoffed. He'd be glad to turn Phineas to the Dark Side. "Is there a face paint booth somewhere around here, then?" The large eyes searched for the absurdity that was obviously nonexistent. "And where's Perry?"

The Sith rolled his eyes as the phrase was uttered, glaring again at the triangular-headed padawan. "I was going to find Perry, but then I found this. The Sith-inator. It struck me, and now the power of the Dark Side pulses through my veins, the poison of the Rebellion gone from my body. Join me, brother, and together—"

"No!" The pitiful Jedi learner spat, confusion and disappointment streaming through his eyes. "I won't do this! Something's happened to you, we need to fix it." He reached out a hand towards the black and red boy, wanting anything but help from a Jedi.

Ferb scoffed, "Ha, you think I'll just turn back and go with you like that? You've always pushed me to do what you wanted. Did you ever think to ask me what I wanted? If I wanted to explore the galaxy? If I actually enjoyed the life as a moisture farmer?"

"I assum—"

"Assumed," the Sith spat, his glare able to cut like a saber, "of course you did. 'Ferb and I don't need to explore the galaxy; Ferb and I have everything we need on Tatooine; Ferb and I want nothing but to BE IN THE REBELLION!'" Steamy breath flew from the boy's flared nostrils, a snarl curling his lips.

A hurt expression washed over the young boy's face, his eyes wide and brows dipping. "Ferb, I didn't know—"

"Of course you didn't!" Ferb growled, pulling a metal hilt from his belt. "You never thought to think of what I wanted, you always assumed since I was the quiet type that I automatically ALWAYS AGREED WITH YOU!" With the final words, a red light dimly lit his already angry face. The buzz of the lightsaber droned on as always; but now with its red hue, it was all the more ominous.