A/N: Sara, I love you. Otherwise, I would be reading. Haha. Rewrite of E&B lemon in Broken Down In Bars and Bathrooms. I find it to be a bit more fitting. Enjoy.

With Carlisle and Esme on an anniversary vacation, and the girls shopping, I was left alone in the Cullen mansion with Edward, Emmett, and Jasper.

"Now what?" Emmett asked from the couch where he sat with a car magazine. I recognized his wicked grin before it even appeared. "Oh, Bella?"

"No."

I was not in the mood for his games—created for the sole purpose of exploiting my humanity.

"But why?"

"Because I said so."

"Hmph."

I rolled my eyes at his pouting, and went to the kitchen to make myself a sandwich. I pulled turkey and cheese from the refrigerator and grabbed the bread off the counter. Before I could start, though, Edward was gently pushing me out of the way to do it himself. I let out a defeated sigh and sat down on a stool by the counter. He had my sandwich in front of me only moments later, and I muttered my thanks.

"What's wrong?" he asked, his eyebrows on the verge of pulling together in confusion.

"Nothing, I just feel helpless a lot. You never let me do anything." I started to pick apart the sandwich, as I often did with my meals. "I just feel like a baby sometimes."

"You silly girl, I'll never understand you. You don't know how happy it makes me to get to do little things like this for you." He sat down next to me and began gently stroking my cheek. "I just want to take care of you. What kind of gentleman would I be if I let you make your own lunch?" We both laughed softly, and he gently kissed me.

"Thank you for making me lunch," I murmured, grabbing his hand as I used the other to eat.

"Anytime I can, Bella."

"So what are we going to do for two days?" I muttered, my mouth stuffed with sandwich.

He looked pensive for a moment. "I'm not sure yet. Just don't let Emmett do anything." He shook his head, attempting to drown out his brother's thoughts.

"Should I be scared?"

"Probably."



"Great," I sighed, stuffing the last bite of my sandwich into my mouth. I quickly grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, and chugged it.

"God, kid, slow down." Jasper walked over to the sink to wash his hands. "You're gonna make yourself sick like that, you know. You didn't eat yesterday."

"Thanks, mom."

He glowered at me, and I smirked right back. After a near ten-minute stare down, Jasper seemed to remember his original intention.

"Oh, Bella, right. Uhm…will you come upstairs with me for a minute? I wanted to show you this book I found."

"Before I give my consent, what is it?" I crossed my arms over my chest indifferently.

"I swear, you're gonna love it." His eyes seemed to light up as he continued. "I found an first edition Carlisle has of the Canterbury Tales."

My mouth gaped. "Holy crow, why are we still standing in the kitchen?"

Forgetting poor Edward, I ran up the stairs and into Carlisle's study without a second thought.

Jasper was not behind me.

I started to look back out in the hall when the door closed abruptly. From behind it, Emmett smirked, and soon his booming laughter shook the room. Before I could ask what was so funny, the answer came in the form of a crash in the kitchen. Jasper and Edward.

"Emmett…" I said slowly, backing away from the noticeably slaphappy vampire. "What's going on here? Are you and Jasper plotting to kill me or something?"

His face shone with realization. "No, not at all." He came over, and leaned down to whisper in my ear. "But that would be a great idea to plot in lover boy's head, huh?" He laughed again, and soon Edward's ripping growl could be heard.

"Don't, Emmett. Seriously, though, what are you guys doing?"

The wicked grin appeared again, and more snarling flowed up the stairs. "I'm here to help you, Bella, as is Jasper. We know what you want from the prude, and we want to help you get it, my dear, sweet, little human." He petted my head, and invited me to sit in one of the two chairs directly across from Carlisle's desk.

"I see," I murmured, keeping a poker face for the time being. "And what is it you have to offer me, my dear, sweet, big vampire?"



He chuckled ominously. "I have a nice little tale to tell. It's the story of a girl who liked a boy, and one day this girl discovered one incredibly powerful turn-on."

"Go on," I encouraged, poker face still in tact.

"Before Alice and Jasper came along, we all lived in Denali with the girls and Eleazar. Edward has told you about them, has he not?" I nodded and he went on. "Well, Tanya once told me little story about a certain hunting trip. Apparently, she was feeling a little flirty, and asked Edward to give her a piggy back ride. Being the gentleman he is, he did." Emmett paused to roll his eyes. "He carried her for a while, and he didn't seem to catch on to the flirting. So she bit him. You see, dear girl, Edward has his little weaknesses just like you do. It's right about here." He pointed to the crook of his own neck, just south of the hollow beneath his ear. "You bite him there, and he'll have you in bed before you can blink."

"So what happened with Tanya? He told me he's a virgin."

"Oh, trust me, he is. He threw her down and took off in the opposite direction. She told me she could see his boner for a mile." We shared a quiet laugh.

"Why are you helping me with this?" Different scenarios of 'favors' flashed through my mind, sending a shudder down my spine.

"Because, kid, you both really need it. The boy's one hundred and seven; it's time he got some. And Alice and Rose have a bet on how long it'll be before you spontaneously combust."

"And you're doing this just because you think we should?"

He laughed, loudly again, before answering. "Pretty much."

"But what if he just bolts like he did with the slut? That's certainly not going to help anything."

That terrifying smirk again. "Oh, that won't be a problem. Trust me, little one." He stood, and gestured for me to join. After throwing an arm around my shoulder and guiding me toward the door, our setting sank in again, bringing me out of my erotic reverie.

"What did Jasper do with him?" I listened, my ear pressed to the door, for any sign of combat below us.

"They're outside, or in the basement. I'm not sure. But Jasper's probably smart enough to keep him in the basement; he's smarter than me, after all. Come on, we have strategy to discuss."

My boyfriend's brother is smarter than anyone has ever given him credit for. Not concerning ourselves with the detainment in the basement, Emmett and I put a lot of hard work, and fun, into our set-up. In the family room was an open space for the boys to make the tackle; all furniture had been moved to the farthest walls. We lit candles in Edward's room, and turned down the fresh sheets. I made sure to clear a path to the bed, and covered that path with red rose petals.

7:23



I sat down on the couch in my salmon-pink Victoria's Secret nightie, exasperated. Emmett kindly avoided staring at my exposed cleavage and long legs as he whistled for Jasper.

"Bring forth the prisoner!"

I chuckled, and soon the sound of loud, clamorous footsteps could be heard in the distance. Only then did I realize I had no clue how to find the basement; therefore, I didn't know where to look for an entrance.

Somehow, the boys came from the kitchen: Edward blindfolded, and Jasper restraining him as he thrashed and snarled.

"Where is she? What did you do with her?" he growled, hearing Emmett's approach.

"Edward, you should really calm down. You need to be on your best behavior for tonight's plans." He paused to wink at me. "Bella, assure the boy you're okay." He nodded in my direction as he spoke.

"Bella?"
I stood and walked closer to him. "I'm here, Edward. And better than ever." I couldn't suppress the laugh in my throat.

"What's so funny?"

"Oh, nothing. Nothing at all."

He cleared his throat. "Well if no one's going to tell me, could someone take off the DAMN BLINDFOLD?!"

"Sure," Emmett laughed. "Just hold on another second or two. Jasper, guide our prisoner to the couch, please." Jasper followed the command, sitting Edward gently on the couch. "Ready?" he asked Jasper, shifting so that he was ready to bolt for Edward and hold him down. "Go!"

I stood to the side as the blindfold was removed, giving Edward his vision of me…in my very little clothing. His eyes bulged and focused on my legs, so he didn't see Emmett launch himself to his left side to restrain him, Jasper taking up the right.

"What the—," Edward began, but trailed off, inarticulate.

"Don't be mad, ok?" I asked, sauntering toward him. "I love you."
"Bella, what the hell is going on here?"

I checked again to be sure the boys had a good hold on him. Emmett had his knee on Edward's thigh, his arms holding his shoulder and forearm; Jasper mirrored him. I nodded to the best brothers I could ever ask for. "Thanks, guys."

Without thinking too much about what I was about to do, I crawled into Edward's lap, straddling him. His eyes grew even larger, but he still hadn't managed to find his voice.



"I love you," I whispered once more against the cold skin of his neck. "Forgive me, for I have sinned." I grazed my teeth along his neck.

A sharp intake of breath, a contraction of muscles, and a poking against my thigh.

"I've been a bad, bad girl," I sang into his ear seductively. "I've been careless with a delicate man."

"It's a sad, sad world," Emmett interrupted, laughing, "when a girl would break a boy just because she can."

Jasper reached over to smack the back of his head. Hard.

I rolled my eyes at him, and leaned down to Edward's neck again. Before I'd even made contact, he stiffened again. In all senses. I chuckled at my success, and bit him harder, though he couldn't be hurt by it. He began thrashing, black eyes lusting after me. The boys held him until he stopped his squirming, and then they relaxed, but still held him.

Emmett smiled at his triumphant success. "Bella, it seems our work here is done. Don't forget: wrap it before you tap it." He and Jasper chortled, while Edward looked up at them with pained eyes.

"Emmett, you swore you'd never tell," he whispered. "I trusted you with that around her."

"Man, trust me, this is for your own good. Have fun." They released him at the same time, and he was throwing me over his shoulders and running.

I caught Emmett and Jasper bump knuckles and wink at me on the way up the stairs. I waved back at them, and Emmett gestured for me to smack Edward's ass. I laughed, but complied, and they began to laugh with me.

"Giddy up!" Emmett shouted as we rounded the second story foyer and up the second flight of stairs.

I made the mistake of blinking, and I opened my eyes to find myself mid-air, flying toward the golden bed. The rose petals, I noticed, had been blown aside in the mad dash for the bed; some of the candles near the door even went out.

"Bella," he growled as he laid himself gently over me, "you are my greatest sin, I swear it. The worst temptation to cross my path in all these years." I could tell from his sparkling, now-golden eyes and heart-breaking grin that he was merely teasing me, and I giggled as he kissed my neck repeatedly.

"You aren't mad at me, are you? For biting you and all?"

He looked up at me again as if he planned to response, but I could almost see a light bulb flashing above his head as he thought better of it. He answered my question by ripping one of the straps of my nightie.

I glared at him while pouting, and, as if reading my thoughts, he growled, "I'll buy you another. As many as you like, in any color. Right now, I need you." With that said, aforementioned nightie was gone, as was my lacy black bra.



"Well this is hardly fair," I whispered seductively as I leaned up to his ear. "You're still fully dressed." I grabbed onto his button-up shirt with a firm grip, and with one hand, I undid the buttons quickly. The shirt ended up somewhere, probably on a candle with my lack of grace, on the other side of the room. I looked down at him, my fingers grazing his chest, to find that he'd managed to kick off his jeans, as well.

"Better?" he panted.

"Much."

"I love you so much, Bella. I need you."

I looked at him again—really looked at him—and my heart swelled with love and pride. He was mine. The epitome of perfection lying on top of me, about to perform the most passionate of acts, sealing us each as one another's.

"You're still too good for me," I said, smiling impishly.

"Isabella," he scolded. "You know how important you are to me. We've been through so much together, and yet here we are. I don't know about you, but I'd say this is about the happiest I could be, even after all that's happened in the past year and a half. Would I have staged an entire battle if I didn't love you with every fiber of my being? No, I don't think so." He smiled, and stroked my cheek softly with his thumb.

"Thank you," I murmured almost inaudibly. "You always know exactly how to make me feel better."

An evil smirk I'd recently seen Emmett wear shone on his angel's face. "Well, hopefully tonight I can do that in more than one way." His eyebrows rose suggestively, and in a flick of his thumb, my panties were added to the pile of clothes. "I love you, Bella. And I hope that this will help you realize that. That, and that I will never leave your side again."

I noticed at this point that his boxers were gone, too. He looked at me, his eyes smoldering, and ducked his head the slightest bit. "Are you ready?" he asked breathlessly, obviously on the brink of insanity.

I couldn't find my voice, so I settled for a pathetic nod, and grabbed onto his shoulders.

Carefully, so very carefully, he pushed himself inside me. I gasped, and he quickly scanned my face. I smiled my reassurance, and he pulled out again almost completely. With another thrust, I dug my nails viciously into his back.

"Faster, Edward," I pleaded, breathless.

He responded by sliding one of his hands down my side, settling it on the small of my back. He began to respond to my pleas, and the faintest murmur of a growl was breathed onto my neck. Edward pulled his head back to look at me again, and I noticed his eyes were again black. Without giving me time to respond to his eye color, Edward attacked my lips fully, kissing me with enough passion to set off a bomb.



I wrapped my legs around his waist as the thrusts became faster yet again. With every moan that I uttered for him, he sped up, closer and closer to his climax with merely the thought that he could do this to me. The same applied to me. His growls, moans, everything, sent me into a frenzy.

With one final scream from me, and with one final roar from Edward, we came violently, gripping each other as if existence depended on it. We were both panting, and both covered in sweat due to my perspiration and his close contact.

Quickly, Edward went to turn out the lights. Upon returning, he pulled the sheets over our still-nude forms, and kissed my shoulder.

"Sleep now, my Bella. Dream sweet dreams of me," he joked, his arm snaking around my waist and pulling me against him.

"Who else would I dream about?" I grumbled, already half asleep.

Then I was dreaming, lying next to my angel in the soft grass.