Yeah, this isn't very funny more WTF really.

Disclaimer:I own nothing

It was the day after the First Task, I sat in my favourite comfy armchair, finishing some homework. I wished my two best friends, Harry Potter and Ron Weasley would care more for their studies but that really would be too much to ask. And anyway, at the moment I was quite happy to see them absent from the common room; I could do without Ron's constant sighing and Harry's frustrating finger tapping when all three of us were trying to study. No, I like the peace and quiet, and as the common room was mostly empty, that's exactly what I had.

I was just reading through my Potions essay when I heard a scream that sent a chill down my back. It came from the boys' dormitory. It was so terrifying so full of fear that I found myself becoming paralysed by fear. I saw Harry and fellow fifth year Seamus Finnegan come running down the staircase. I could safely say that in all my four years of knowing him, I had never seen Harry so scared, and this frightened me even more.

Harry grabbed onto my arms as he tried to talk through his terror.

"Hermione. I- I need you to listen very carefully as this is of the utmost importance."

"Harry, what's wrong? What's happened?" Is it your shoulder? But Madam Pomfrey said it was fine!"

"No it has nothing to do with my damn shoulder, this is much more important! Hermione. I need you to conjure – "

"What do you mean it's more important than your shoulder? Harry, that dragon could have killed you!"

"Hermione, a life hangs in the balance here! I need you to – "

"What? Is it Ron? Oh God is he alright! Or is it Neville or Dean? Or Seamus, Seamus are you alright?"

"Hermione! There's nothing wrong with us, it's someone much more important; now listen I need you to conjure a pair of tweezers because I can't find mine."

I stared, "A pair of tweezers? Why?"

"Hermione just do it!"

Alright, alright" thoroughly confused, I took out my wand.

"Hurry up, Alphie is in agony!" I handed over the tweezers and the two boys sprinted up the stairs. Hang on, who's Alphie? I looked at the staircase leading to the boys' dormitory. I know it is frowned upon for a girl to go into the dormitory but I wanted to know who this Alphie was. And Harry said he was dying and in agony, I had to help.

I ran up the stairs and into the fourth year dorms. Ron, Dean, Neville, Seamus and Harry were all huddled around Harry's bed; I couldn't see who was lying on it.

"Right his wound is clean" Ron said with a sigh of relief as he put the lid back on the container. Hang on. I looked at the container in Ron's hand in disbelief; Broom Polish. I walked around the bed to see Harry's Firebolt lying on it. Harry was trying to pull out a bent twig from the brooms tail. With a final yank, he managed to pull it out. The boys sighed in relief.

"There, there Alphie," Harry cooed, patting his broom, "All better now." I was in shock did he really just say . . . did he really call his . . . I looked dazed as the boys patted the broom.

"What the hell are you doing, all that was for a broom?" The boys stared at me as if I had grown another head.

"Alphie was injured by the dragon." Ron said as if he was talking to a two year old, "We had to fix him." I rolled my eyes "Honestly it looks no different than it did yesterday" I went to grab the broom; Harry left out a strangled cry and hugged the Firebolt to his chest, glaring at me.

"Alphie has been through a terrible ordeal, he needs rest, if you're not going to respect that then leave." I looked around to see all the boys glaring daggers at me; I sighed and walked out the door. I looked back one more time and I saw the boys were all patting Alph- er the broom with chants of "Poor Alphie"

I left the room frustrated. Boys!

A/N I have no idea either.