A/N: Well, well, well, look who's back with a new fic. This one's inspired by the scene in DMC4 when Nero runs into Dante who then proceeds to jump off a cliff. I suppose you could call this a retelling of that scene lol. The first time I played DMC4, I fell in love almost instantly with Dante x Nero from the fight scene at the start and from then on, it's like any scene involving the two of them is precious. I have yet to read a fic based around this scene so I thought I'd better write one. I wrote it in about an hour so I hope it's alright. Also don't expect any hot man sex because as stupid as it sounds, I am actually terrified of writing it. It's silly because I read it all the time so you'd think it would be easy...
Oh also, notice the pun in the title? Yeah I couldn't think of anything witty, so I thought I'd go with a sad pun instead.

I do not own Devil May Cry or characters, they belong to Capcom.

Nero trudged out from the miners' tunnel and shielded his eyes from the sudden blinding light. When he had adjusted, he looked around.
"A forest...?" he muttered to himself.
He took a few steps forward only to hear someone else talking.

"What the hell is this?" a familiar voice came from behind him. Nero swung around to see Dante looking around somewhat confusedly. A voice at the back of his mind noted that he looked quite endearing with that lost expression on his face.
"Must be the effect of the gate..." Dante mused to himself. He looked up and grinned at Nero.
"Sorry kid, this is gonna have to wait..." He stepped backwards off the cliff he had been standing on, spreading his arms as he fell freestyle, the triumphant grin still on his face.

Nero would be having none of that though. He reached out his Devil Bringer and used its snatch ability to haul Dante back onto the cliff where he fell in a rather graceless heap. He looked up at Nero, stunned.
Nero couldn't help laughing at his face as Dante continued to blink at him blankly.

"Damn, kid, that arm of yours must come in handy," he said, finally recovering. He stood up and brushed off the dirt from his beloved coat, then looked over to where Nero had Blue Rose pointed directly at his head. "Come on, you already know that can't really hurt me."

Nero took a step backwards as Dante began to advance on him, his arm shaking a little as he struggled to hold Blue Rose straight. The somewhat predatory smirk that was spreading across Dante's face was unnerving him a little. As he continued to step backwards he felt something hard press into his back and realised he'd backed into a tree. He met the elder hunter's eyes, half fearful, half defiant.

Dante chuckled quietly. "So what did you pull me up for anyway?"

"I-I need to talk to you," Nero began, disgusted at himself for stammering.

Dante leaned his hands against the tree on either side of Nero, effectively trapping him there. "Then talk," he murmured, Nero gulping at his proximity. He glared at him, trying to think of Kyrie, only Kyrie, definitely not the beautiful blue of Dante's eyes, or how silky his silver mane looked or- 'KYRIE! THINK OF KYRIE!' He mentally berated himself, shutting his eyes and trying to conjure up an image of the songstress.
Dante watched his internal struggle with amusement.

Nero opened his eyes, his glare back in full force. "I'm placing you under arrest. You will now come with me to the Order."
Dante cracked up laughing. Nero watched him, bemused, as Dante bent over double, trying to catch his breath.

"What's so funny?" he finally demanded.

"You, kid." Dante replied, finally catching his breath. "I have you backed up against a tree, and you reckon you can place me under arrest?" He snickered a bit more and then looked back at Nero. "You might be able to prevent me from jumping off cliffs, but I'd like to see you even try to take me somewhere I don't want to go."

Realising somewhat belatedly that he was no longer pinned against a tree; Nero sidestepped, drawing Red Queen at the same time. "It'd be easy, old man." Nero grinned cockily at him, his confidence returned now that he was no longer in such a vulnerable position. "All I'd need to do is whack you over the head a couple of times and then drag you all the way to Headquarters."

Dante raised an eyebrow. "Oh really?" Before Nero even had a chance to blink, Dante had Air Tricked to right in front him and tackled him to the ground, straddling him to prevent his escape.
"Well, well, this is the second time in five minutes that I've pinned you down, kid," Dante chuckled. "I'm beginning to see a pattern."

"Fuck you, old man," Nero replied, gritting his teeth and wincing slightly as Dante's knee "accidentally" brushed his groin. His pants were already feeling uncomfortably tight and Dante's devilish expression wasn't making anything easier for him.

Dante smirked, then without any warning swooped down to pull Nero into a brief but searing kiss.
Nero scowled half-heartedly at him through half-lidded eyes. "What the fuck?" he asked, trying to struggle out from beneath his captor. He stopped when he realised he was only causing more friction between their bodies, which definitely wasn't helping his current situation.

Dante kissed him again, lingering this time to plunge his tongue into Nero's mouth. Nero gasped at the sensation, his mind taken over by instinct. He forgot about Kyrie, forgot the Order, forgot that he was most definitely STRAIGHT, forgot anything and everything that wasn't Dante. He reached up with his Devil Bringer to tangle his claws in Dante's hair, which, as his numb brain noted, was just as silky smooth as it looked. He leant up into the kiss, his tongue emerging to wrestle with the more experienced hunter's.

An ancient and primal dance for dominance was initiated, and then completed as Dante won the battle and once again plundered Nero's moist cavern.
Then all too soon, or so Nero's hazy mind thought, Dante pulled away, licking his lips like a smug cat who has eaten the cream.

Nero had half a mind to pull Dante back down for another kiss, but then reason broke back into his mind like a raging flood and he blushed scarlet as he realised what he had just been doing.
Dante chuckled, standing up and looking down at Nero. "Well it's been lovely talking to you, but I'm afraid I really must be off now," he said and before Nero could react, he had once again stepped off the cliff fallen into the green maze of jungle below.

Nero hastily got up and looked down but even his sharp eyes could no longer catch a glimpse of the red clad demon hunter. He glared at the trees below, trying to deny what had just happened.
"No way did that bastard just kiss me, NO FUCKING WAY!" He punched the tree he had been pinned against not long ago, the memory causing his cheeks to heat up again. He could deny it had happened all he wanted, but he couldn't deny his current state of arousal, if his uncomfortably tight pants were any indication. He also couldn't deny the feelings of failure as he realised that once again he had lost to the elder slayer, in more ways than one. "How the hell am I supposed to get him to the Order?" He sighed and sat down on a nearby rock.
"How much could he really know..."

A/N: Hope it's alright, as I said, I wrote it on a whim and in a short amount of time. Also it should be noted that I did not actually have this cinematic on hand like I did when I wrote my first DMC fic so if there's any inaccurate quoting/description, please forgive me, it was done from memory and I haven't seen this scene for a while so...
Oh yeah also I don't ship Nero x Kyrie but this scene's pretty early in the game so Nero doesn't know he has other options open to him yet lol.
Hope everyone had a great Christmas and New Year's!
Also I'm hoping to write another fic soon similar to Dante vs the Playstation 3, except Nero playing DMC3. Can't you just imagine him watching young Dante zooming around on the rocket from Kalina Ann with a 0.o wtf expression? I can. Young Dante is like on drugs or something lol. Anyway my rant is over.
Please Review!