A/N: Dear, dear readers who have stumbled unfortunately upon this fic might be slightly surprised to find this fic is about Hitler, and his mustache-ey thing. But, it is a CRACK fic. Just thought I would let you know. Because Hitler has a time machine. And knows Karate. And can kick your butt. Kindanotreally. Oh, and as a disclaimer, I do not own Hitler. But the mustache was my idea. Oknotrlly. I don't even own his time machine. Yah, I know, heavy sigh should follow the last one. With out a further moment of hesitation, here is Hitler. In all his glory.
Baby Hitler lay sleeping in his adorable crib. With an adorable frown. Wait, it's a smile. Seems kinda like a frown…And is that a mustache? What? Oh, ehem. Onto my point that I was surely going to get to. Clutched in his pudgy little fingers was a picture drawn by him (obviously, look at the crappiness). A picture of Hitler (and his mustache) standing on a pile of (doggy poo?) Jews (I was close!) No you weren't, shut up!
Hitler stirred and sat up. In a voice that sounded a lot like that one guy who screamed something about Jews (that's Hitler you idiot) he said, "Who is talking about me and my mustache!"
(It's supposed to be my mustache and I)
Hitler took no notice of the annoying voice (hey!) and continued to glare at his room. Then he stood up and looked at his 'List of Things to do that are good because of my mustache'. No seriously, see the bad handwriting? That is what it says.
Grow a mustache, groom mustache, talk to mustache, name mustache, cry and watch mustache go to college, train mustache to be evil, train mustache to like its mustache, and congratulate mustache were all crossed out. Next in line was…!
(Kill all the Jewsssssss!) No, actually it says build a time machine, make up a seriously fatty food to fatten up the people of America in the future, and bomb the Russians. (Why the Russians?) No idea, now shut up and listen to my awesomerific story. (Big ego much?)
Hitler smiled and nodded. "World, you are mine soon!" He laughed some really stupid laugh and then went back to sleep.
And he slept…
And he slept…..
A n d h e s l e p t…
Andheslept…..
THE END (No its not, don't listen to the bold voice.) You dare defy me?
…
Ok, its not the end. (Told you~)
Leave a review telling me what you thought of it. I worked really hard on this.
Liar.
DAMN YO-