Disclaimer: Not mine. I still cry about that sometimes.
FAGGOTRY AHEAD. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. Rated M because I'm not sure if this is T. Maybe? I don't give a shit.
Hey. ^-^ This is my first time publishing a fanfic...Be gentle? lol
Just a short oneshot based on a prompt I found on tumblr. No specific timeline, a bit AU and OOC.
I don't have a beta, so any grammatical/spelling errors or blaring mistakes are mine.
"I'm back. And I brought sustenance," Dean Winchester called out proudly, setting the pie, beers, and the keys to Baby on one of the tables by the door. He rubbed his hands together expectantly. That pie had been calling his name all damn day.
After a single slice had been left for Castiel, Dean balanced his heavily-laden plate in one hand, a beer in the other, and went to sit on his bed and catch up on Doctor Sexy in the pure bliss that can only come from brews and 3,000 calories of sweet pecan heaven...but something was blocking his way. A certain trenchcoated something holding a computer.
"Do I want to know what you're doing on the floor?"
"I was reading something," he admitted slowly, "And I'm...aroused."
This was definitely not what Dean had expected to come out of an angel's mouth. He closed his eyes "And the floor...?"
"It is cold."
He had to strongly resist the urge to facepalm, as pie wasn't half as delicious when eaten off of your own face. But teaching an angel how to function as a normal human being was like raising Ben through puberty all over again. He sighed. "Go take a cold shower."
Castiel nodded solemnly and went about his way.
Dean picked up the laptop from the floor and rested it on his legs. It was nagging him: what could turn an angel on, really?
-
No more than five minutes in, he snapped the computer shut, blushing. In his defence, the language was extremely descriptive. People really were crazy, saying these things about Castiel, fanfiction or not. The man was an angel, for Christ's sake, not some chick from Busty Asian Beauties. "Throbbing" and "passionately" weren't exactly in his vocabulary.
"You read it," came from behind him. It wasn't a question, so Dean only grunted, so the darker haired of the two continued, "I found it educational."
"Educational? It's fanfiction for Chuck's Supernatural books."
"Do you know what they call us?"
"No, I-" He turned around and stopped dead.
"Destiel." He wasn't wearing anything, not even a towel. He came closer, slowly, and Dean felt the blush burn its way up his neck again. His eyes purposely didn't leave his friend's face.
"We talked about this, Cas. You're doing that socially awkward thing."
He suddenly seemed insecure. "My vessel is not pleasing to you. I-I thought I had seen you admiring it. I must have been mistaken. Forgive me." And as he turned around to leave, Dean's gaze drifted down to admire the perfect little ass that had been hidden under The Trenchcoat for the longest time.
'Yep, definitely bisexual.'
"Castiel." Dean barked, "I'll get this son of a bitch open if you won't come out." There was only a mumbled response on the other side of the door that didn't sound remotely angelic, so Dean lifted a booted foot and kicked out.
"Dean!" Castiel shrieked in an uncharacteristically high voice, covering himself with a towel.
"Why didn't you just tell me you needed clothes?"
"I always liked it when you kicked in doors." Castiel whispered, blushing high on his cheeks.
He couldn't help but laugh as he grabbed some clothes that would fit the angel. "We Winchesters are irresistible, I can understand the effect we have on you, Cas." 'Yeah, laugh it off. Good job,' he congratulated himself.
Castiel accepted the clothes with a faint smile. When Dean turned around, his best friend was dressed in a plaid shirt and dark jeans that Sammy had grown out of years before. He hadn't even been sure why they were still lying around, but now Dean Dean was glad they'd kept them.
"Son of a bitch, Cas. You look just like the rest of us." He didn't mention that Castiel looked sexy when he didn't wear The Trenchcoat, as fond of it as Dean was.
"Thank you, Dean. I am unaccustomed to such styles of clothing, but they are comfortable."
Suddenly, an awkward silence settled over the two men. Dean let it stew for a moment before he clapped his hands together. "As a celebration of our recently evicted nest of vamps, I have your first slice of pie and an episode of the Sexy with our names on it."
"Why didn't Doctor Piccolo just 'jump Sexy's bones,' as you say?"
"She gave up on him and went after Doctor Mierda a few weeks ago."
"So she is not aware that her boyfriend's last name means 'shit' in Spanish."
"...No."
Castiel nodded silently, contemplating the subplots in the show. "For a television program, it was enjoyable."
Dean grinned and punched him on the shoulder. As soon as he turned back to the screen, Castiel rubbed it tenderly. Those Winchesters were rough.
He continued, "I understand why you crave pies now. It was delicious."
Dean's eyes were on him again, searching his face until he whispered, "You just watched a marathon of Doctor Sexy and ate pie. Cas, I'm going to kiss you."
This being totally unexpected, the angel had no time to prepare himself before a pair of surprisingly soft lips were pressed to his own. They were warm, and gentle, and slowly burning into him in a way that made his hands fist up in Dean's shirt. Hands were weaved through his hair, and soft tugging urged him to tilt his head back and open the kiss.
Dean sighed softly into his mouth. Castiel felt as if his heart were bursting, a rush of emotion so surreal that he pulled away with a gasp.
"You okay, Cas?" Dean questioned, giving Castiel a quick once over. He looked alright. Sex hair did him well.
"I feel so many things," he panted, his hands shaking loose of the fabric they had nearly ripped. "Emotions. Is this normal?"
"Yeah, that's normal after your first kiss with someone. I feel it, too," Dean confessed.
Castiel took Dean's hand and pressed it over his heart, which was nearly jumping out of his chest. "This?" He nodded, his eyes never leaving the angel's face.
After a meaningful glance to his lap, where he was straining against the denim, he saw his...(boyfriend? best friend?) his Dean trying to hide a smirk. He pushed his jacket to the side and was sporting an erection of his own. Castiel nearly glowed and dived back into that gorgeous mouth.
-
Sam was utterly confused. He went on a solo hunt in Wisconsin on Thursday. When he met up with Castiel and Dean on Monday, they were acting suspicious...like horny teenagers. He honestly couldn't care less about whether or not his brother was bisexual and banging their guardian angel, he was just glad Dean had something good in his life.
With a dreamy, chickflick-worthy sigh, he sat down with his computer. He had forgotten it with Dean, and he had missed it. He gave it a loving pat, flipped it open, and immediately slammed it shut again.
He would never be able to look at Cas the same.
That was the only place that I could end it without Sam having a misplaced montage where he confessed his undying feels for Lucifer.
[The 'Yep, definitely bisexual' part was inspired by a line from Not Gay bySam-and-Sherlock-in-the-TARDIS.]
Like I said, be constructive? I might cry if you're not. No, but really.