This story starts a looonnggg time ago, in a country far, far, far away. There was a young maiden who dreamed of her perfect wedding. Her name was EllaCinder. Some of you know her as Cinderella, but that is WRONG. Time has changed the story so that you gentle reader will no longer know the facts. We're here to change that.

EllaCinder sat in the window as she did her darning. Her feet got cold when her socks had holes in them, so she was darning them. Her gaze turned to the outside and she started to humm. Darning was so boring that her mind usually turned to other things. Like as not, it was often of a wedding that she daydreamed about.

"Cinderella, you moron!" complained her husband. "Will you stop making up weird stories and telling them to the mice?"

Cinderella sighed, annoyed. Perhaps her fictional EllaCinder's wedding would go just as she had daydreamed, but hers left much to be desired. The ceremony was just fine, she supposed, but it was a huge disappointment to find that the love of her life Prince Charming just couldn't understand her desire- no! Her need to befriend small animals.

"Besides," she huffed, "not doing so goes against my Disney heroine contract."

"I'm almost finished with this page," her husband said happily. He held up a very carefully made scrapbook. "See? It has a little kitty on the corner of that page!"

Cinderella smiled slightly. It -was- a very cute little paper kitty.

Inside she was wincing. God, how she hated paper kitties. What she wanted was a real kitty. But noo, P.C. was allergic to small animals and household pets so she wasn't allowed to have one. Instead she got paper kitties. And a husband who scrapbooked. Cinderella sighed as she stood up.

"Hooneeeyy," she whined, "let's go DO something. One of the villagers is having a quaint little BBQ. Let's go to that. And you could use a shower instead of wasting the rest of that day with that book. Remember that we agreed that you weren't going to spend more than 3 hours a day working on that!"

"Huh, what? What did you say Cinds? I missed it. You should know better than to talk to me when I'm putting finished pages back into my book. It's a very delicate process not to bend anything or smear it!" Prince-y poo said to Cinderella.

"I hate it when you call me Cinds."

"Really?" The Prince asked, mildly surprised. "I referred to you as 'Cinds' at least five times in this scrapbook. Maybe a few other times in other books." He searched his desk and person for white-out.
"You are MUCH too obsessed with scrapbooking!"

Cinderella was just opening her mouth to say the very same thing when it came from a whole different voice in the doorway. The king.

"Am I to hand over MY kingdom to one who can't tear himself away from... snap shots and pretty pieces of paper?" The king asked angrily.

"Ummm..." the prince thought for a while, "that's how I always thought it worked..."

While the prince was speaking the king was slowly turning various shades of red. He seemed to also have trouble breathing. Cinderella rushed to his aid, and to his side.

"Well, like DUH, Mr. Princealingling! It soo is not going to work like that. You have to, like earn the kingdom. You are such a DUMMY! Now put the scrapbook away and leave it alone. I need you to go on a quest for me." Cinderella had only started her rant, only to be cut off by the king.

"What a good idea Cinderella. My son will go on a quest. A quest for... umm, a quest for...uhh..."

"Suggestion!" the prince interjected. "Can my quest be for white-out? Because I seriously need to fix this now that I know that she doesn't want to be called Cinds."
The king settled down a little bit, probably a little tired of being angry. "I suppose you are a tad too hopeless of a case for a quest. So instead I will send the two of you out to the world on your own for three weeks."

"Three weeks?!" the prince asked, stunned, "Why?"

"Because I see now that my son does not have a realistic perspective of the world, which he needs if he will ever rule this kingdom." The king answered.

"...But..." Cinderella stumbled over worlds, "I just moved in here and I just started adjusting to not having to always clean, and sew, and..."

The king offered no sympathy. "We all have to make sacrifices sometimes."

Cinderella once again found herself plotting different ways she could dispose of all of her husband's scrapbooking junk. This make her feel strangely happy at times.

"Say Cheeeeeese!"

Cinderella and the king barely had a chance to turn their heads to look at the prince before being blinded by a flash.
"That one was definitely a keeper," remarked the prince, "The Day That Cinds-uhhh...derella and I got temporarily kicked out of the castle. Oh! I know exactly what the page will look like!"

"Don't worry, Cindy," the king said sympathetically to his daughter-in-law, "it's just for three weeks."

"I am Cin-der-ELLA!" the newly wed bride corrected before going to pack her things.

"Well, here we are. All this hut thanks to you." Cinderella continued on with a sigh, "Three weeks of living here with basically nothing, and NO SCRAPBOOKING! Ok? Can you do that for me, my love?" The prince stood there gaping for a minute. "You look like a fish, dear. Oh well, I suppose we can compromise here. You can take ONE roll of film a day to be developed when we get back to the castle. Does that work for you?" querried the Mrs. as she swept the dirt floor. "Oh! And for right now, can you hang those pictures up on the wall for me. That's a dear."

After a while longer of listening to the prince mumble, stutter and gape, he finally got to unpacking the memories. Oh, and he agreed to the terms set before him by his dictator wife. What a marriage.

Twitch.
That's what his eye was doing. It was twitching. All on it's own. It was seeing no pretty paper. Where did the pretty paper go? He needed his pretty paper.

So the prince looked like he was about to do something crazy- something desperate even. His eyes showed pure madness and his shoulders heaved as his breathing got more and more shallow. Sweat was starting to appear at his brow.

So he pulled out his camera, turned the lense around towards him and shot a self-portrait at arm's length. "Hahaha... remember the time I went crazy after spending FOREVER away from my scrapbooking?"

"It's been about fifteen minutes since we left the castle and found this hut." Cinderella corrected. She looked at the sun, "Sorry, 20, actually. You know, you could save some of that money you use on film to get me a watch."

The prince's eye twitched. AGAIN.

"oohkay then, let's forget about that. Not that a watch wouldn't come in handy, but we're moving on past that. Alright then. I think I am done with the inside here for now. I am going to go out and enjoy all the little animals. I love them. I could hug them to death! My swookem wookems!!" Squealed Cinderella.

"Geeze, not that again." muttered the prince under his breath. "Uhh, Ella, could you get some lunch while you are out? You know, nip over to the palace kitchens and get us some food. OHH, and my markers, and some paper, and uhh... ok with that look that you are giving me how about just some food? No? Whyever not?! They can't expect us to find, clean, and cook our food! That's the palace's job! Honestly, Ella, please?!" During the whole rather long question from the prince, one would not believe that he had only stopped for a breath once.

Next thing the prince knew, a squirrel was being thrown at his head. The squirrel obviously didn't care much for being thrown and the prince definitely didn't like being mauled by his wife's animal friends, so after a lot of flailing around the little critter was scampering out of the hut. The prince glared at Cinderella, who was looking away, whistling.

"What?" she asked.

"I know you threw that squirrel."

"Me?" Cinderella scoffed, "I'm under Disney heroine contract, I would never treat one of my forest animal friends in such a manner."

The Prince eyed his wife warily before pulling out his camera and shooting another self portrait. "And this was the time that I was mauled by a squirrel." He turned around the camera to get a shot of Cinderella, "And this is-" he trailed off as he got an excellent shot of a rabbit flying at him in midair.
After that hilarious episode. The prince sat, hugging his scrapbook, rocking back and forth.

"Give the scrapbooking a break," Cinderella said cooly, "or face the wrath of more friendly jungle animals."

"Err, don't you mean forest animals?" Asked the prince as he raised his hands up in the air, "Not that it really matters either way, just-thought-you-might-want-to-be-correct-though!" Prince Charming quickly stood up with his scrapbook still in his arms and ran out the door.