Title: Body Crumbles

Author: OpheliacAngel

Characters and Pairings: Alec/Ames, slight Alec/Joshua, slight Alec/Max

Genres: Romance/Angst

Rating: Mature

Summary: Alec couldn't help but sneak out of Terminal City every time he got the opportunity to see the man who had ruined all their lives.

A/N: Written for h/c_bingo for the prompt 'pneumonia.' Rated for language. Title taken from the Dry Cell song. And wow, my first Alec/Ames piece. I've been wanting to do this for ages and I spent so long on this and it was definitely worth it. A shout out to all the Ames/Alec lovers, these two have taken over my soul. Yes, finally, here it is.

When Alec woke up he was no longer hand-cuffed to the bed.

Max was kneeling down beside him, tending to his injuries, taking her time with the extensive bruises marring his face. It felt good lying there, honing in on Max's dark eyes and pursed full lips. She was certainly the woman of his dreams.

And then she had to start in again with her fearless leader business. "Whatever you're doing, Alec, you need to cut it out. You're putting us all in danger here."

This time he didn't remember waking up and leaving Ames White's humble abode. He didn't remember stumbling back to his so-called 'new home' and falling forward into Joshua's arms as he was often prone to do. He wondered if the guy even knew where he was going practically half the nights of the week, but Joshua never said a word and always helped him back to the room they both bunked in.

Joshua was hovering over him now too. "Is medium-fella alright?"

"Yeah, Josh," he groaned as he sat up, forcing Max to pull back as he lowered his feet to the floor and grinned up at the both of them. "Sorry, Maxie, sometimes I just can't help myself."

Max shook her head in exasperation and made to leave the room, turning to Joshua before she closed the door behind her. "Just make sure he doesn't get into anymore trouble, Joshua."

Joshua nodded and turned back towards Alec as the door shut, his arms crossed over his chest. Alec waited, not daring to move another inch; Joshua could be pretty intimidating sometimes. He knew that the guy would never hurt him, but stopping Alec and protecting Alec from both himself and Ames was a different matter. Joshua would do everything in his power to protect all of them, and Alec was no exception.

"Alec needs to stop seeing the bad man. Alec needs to stop being his punching bag."

The X5's eyes widened in disbelief; so Joshua did know where he was going. Yeah, Alec couldn't help but sneak out of Terminal City every time he got the opportunity to see the man who had ruined all their lives. But it could be worse... right?

Alec panicked, his shaking hand as he ran it through his hair betraying that. He knew he had better at least try to explain, as little as he understand his own actions, because he suspected he wouldn't be able to leave again until he did.

"I just... I just need something, Josh. Ya know? I need something more. I know you feel like I'm betraying you, betraying us, but I'm not. Don't tell Max, she won't get it. She'll probably just kick me out."

There was a hurt look on Joshua's face but there was nothing Alec could do about that. He felt bad, he felt really bad because he had no idea what Joshua thought, and he knew he had no idea as to the extent of Alec's depravity. It was more than needing to be hurt, needing to have another routine other than running around and blindly following Max's orders. It was more than needing to be punished for his prior actions, than needing to be wanted and used... used up until there was nothing left of him.

"Don't try to stop me, big guy. I need to do this."

He bent down and pulled his boots on, having half a mind to go see Ames again tonight. Joshua's huge hand on his shoulder stopped him. "Alec keep Joshua company tonight?"

Alec opened his mouth, about to say something entirely smart and witty and maybe even with just a little bit of snark. He closed it when he realized what Joshua was trying to do, folding in on himself like a coward.

Without another word, Joshua pulled Alec's boots off, his large hands pressing Alec back down into the bed. Before Alec could brush those hands away, despite knowing it would be no use, Joshua took the other side of the bed and gently maneuvered Alec's head so that it rested in the curve of Joshua's neck.

"Alec rest and heal now."

Alec smiled. "Yeah, Josh. Sure thing."

He sneaked out of bed two hours later.

"Back for more?"

Ames walked around him in a circle, taunting him, grinning, a knife in his hand. The metal glinted obscenely, courtesy of the minuscule amount of light filtering through the crack in the curtains, and the transgenic could almost see his reflection. Alec wasn't tied to the chair yet, but it was soon to come. His enemy's eyes were on him and it was the strangest thing, feeling more wanted and of use to Ames than to Max.

Ames threw the knife to the ground and surged forward, grabbing Alec's arms in his own powerful hands and squeezing. Alec bit his lip to prevent himself from crying out; there was no going back now.

"You ruined my life," Ames shoved a finger in his face. "I have no life anymore!"

Alec flinched and shuddered, hands instinctively coming up to protect himself except that Ames still held them in his own powerful mitts. He waited. Ames wasn't usually like this, he was always quiet and deadly or coldly vocal but happy nonetheless. Alec didn't know where this sudden rage had come from.

He felt sick just being here, just looking at Ames head-on, his vehemence and his will to thrive, to crush Alec beneath him as if Alec were nothing. He thought it would be enough, to be hurt and to hurt at the same time, but Ames' sudden lack of approval was sickening.

"Let me go," he mumbled, the words nearly lost in his throat.

"What was that?" Ames growled, breath hot against Alec's chilled face, strong hands squeezing his skin harder until Alec feared it would fall away and crumble to dust beneath him.

The rawness of pain restored his voice and rekindled his urgency. "Let me go or I'm gonna upchuck all over you."

Ames' arms immediately retreated and the transgenic rushed over to the bathroom, dropping to his knees painfully and groaning as he threw up the can of peaches he had eaten several hours ago. It was the only thing he had eaten all day.

He was hungry, starving even, and that bullet hole was still in his shoulder, throbbing painfully. He leaned over the toilet again and threw up so violently that he imagined that when he opened his eyes his organs would be floating in the water, mocking him. They were still in his body though when his hazy vision cleared.

There was blood instead.

And then Ames was leaning over him like the fucking grim reaper.

"Jesus, Alec. Don't die on me yet. Don't you dare fucking die on me yet."

If Alec thought that Ames honestly cared so much than maybe he would have come to him sooner, or maybe he would have even stuck around after Ames had his way with him. But Ames didn't know love, couldn't love Alec. The guy had nearly killed his wife just because it was customary for his twisted kind, and the only reason why he cared about his son was because he would grow up to be another him. There was nowhere in the whole equation of Ames' life that Alec could fit into. Then again, there was also no explanation behind why Alec wanted something from the one person he shouldn't be seeking anything from, other than a slow and painful death.

"Fuck you, White. Don't you think I feel bad enough? Why do you think I keep coming back?" Yeah, maybe that's the reason right there.

Maybe Alec was imagining it, but Ames switched the subject pretty quickly. "When's the last time you ate?"

There were blessedly warm hands on his face, a hand first palming his forehead and then both hands grasping his cheeks almost fiercely, wiping away what was most likely blood. When White was done cleaning him up with his fingers and a warm washcloth, his hands rubbed up and down Alec's arms and held Alec's head up when he felt himself falling. It was the only comfort Alec had, and he would take it with open hands.

Ames White was a master at inflicting pain and guilt, was a pro at making Alec hate himself. But he was also damn warm and his eyes roamed over Alec as if he was something precious, and Alec needed that more than he needed air.

"Why do you care?" Alec gritted out. He ached all over and he didn't need this. This interrogation session, this nagging suspicion that suddenly Ames cared about him, cared about him actually surviving past tonight.

"What, you think I grew a heart all of a sudden?" Ames scoffed, looking the transgenic up and down with a mixture of the usual disgust and disdain, though the disdain seemed suspiciously more present this time around. "Take your shirt off."

At any other moment Alec would happily oblige, but he wasn't exactly feeling sexy at this point in time. "Not in the mood," Alec grumbled, but Ames only growled and cut his shirt open with a pair of scissors, exposing the hole still in his shoulder. It was red and inflamed and two sets of eyes looking at it only seemed to make it throb more. Huh, no wonder why he was sick. Still, this didn't explain Ames' awkward but entirely welcome possessiveness.

"Holy fuck, you're like a walking corpse." The words were nearly a whisper, but they filled up the bathroom and Alec's head until there was nothing else.

Alec only groaned, leaning against Ames' willing body, waiting for Ames to leave, waiting to cough up more blood. His mortal enemy was quiet and tense, but obliged the transgenic's need to lean against him for support. He figured out that he was screwed no matter where he was: back in Terminal City, Max would kick him out if he couldn't stand up and therefore couldn't work; and if he stayed here there was a half chance of Ames killing him one way or another, and another half keeping him alive so the both of them could have another go at it.

Alec started and whimpered when Ames picked him up off the fucking freezing tile floor - only quieting when Ames ran a hand through his hair and shushed him softly - and then proceeded to carry him over to the chair, setting him down in it quickly and then leaving. When Alec caught back up with time and looked over at Ames next he was making the bed. The transgenic eyed the dresser drawer that held the handcuffs, but Ames made no move towards it.

"You suddenly a housewife now?" Alec coughed weakly and tasted blood in the back of his throat.

As much as his chest hurt, he still wondered what Ames tasted like. They hadn't actually fucked... yet, but Ames had stripped him down nearly always while he made him bleed one way or another. It was weird that Ames was freaking out now just because Alec was coughing up blood, and freaking out was the correct term. He was like a mother hen, the way he had been hovering over Alec in the bathroom, holding him so close that Alec had been able to hear Ames' heartbeat thundering loudly in his chest.

"Shut up," Ames snapped, but there wasn't much bite in it. "You're lucky I'm doing something nice for you." Nice, really? This was a little too nice. "Should've followed you home and killed you and all of your friends. Or I should've killed all those freaks and left you alive."

Alec wanted to tell him that Terminal City or whatever the hell they wanted to call it wasn't his home, that he felt more at home coughing up his own blood in Ames' bathroom. But saying that might mean Ames kicking him out, and Alec really didn't want to go back out into the cold when there was a nice, warm bed right in front of him, one that Ames certainly seemed willing to lend him.

"Why the sudden interest in keeping me alive?"

Ames bit his lip and goddammit it was hot, it was the sexist thing that Alec had ever seen. The fact that he couldn't even come up with a snappy comeback. Alec shook his head, closed his eyes and willed the image out of his head. Easier said than done. Why the hell was he even here in the first place? Did he want a decent fuck or just a shoulder to cry on? Did he want to just get away from his imprisonment or did he also want Ames to care about him more than anything else in the world?

Ames White had confined him in that polluted building in the first place, had put him smack dab into the fight for his life and for the lives of his kind. Ames White had stripped him of his life, stripped him of his job at Jam Pony and took away any remaining ounce of self-respect he had for himself. Yet all Alec could think about was those lips on his and Ames crawling on top of him, worshiping his body.

He was right in front of him again, standing above him, a dark shadow if not for the total darkness. Alec squinted up at him and imagined that they were outside and the sun was blinding him and Ames was smirking down at him, ridiculous sunglasses, churlish grin, brusque manner and all.

And then Ames was kneeling down, hand on Alec's knee, incredible fucking warm seeping through the fabric. It was then that Alec realized he was still shirtless, and Ames' index finger was trailing along his chest and stomach and tracing the contours of his neck. Forever taunting. "You like bringing me down like this, don't you, fucker? Like trying to make me feel bad. You're the one who's trapping me here. I can't breathe, can't eat, can't fucking think unless you're here."

Huh.

"Wait." Alec came back to full awareness when Ames picked him up and practically threw him into bed. He felt like a blushing bride and he actually kinda sorta liked it. Shit. "You feel bad?" Miracle of the year. Although now Alec really doubts that he'll ever leave the bed once he gets into it. And really, why go back to a life of starvation and imprisonment and feeling utterly useless and not seeing a fucking end in sight when he can just stay here and wonder what the hell Ames will do next?

"I said shut up," Ames reminded him, and Alec grinned until Ames smacked it off his face. So much for winning that round, or any round at all. Alec laid back and tried to relax, but the tightening in his chest didn't lessen and the not knowing what Ames would do next wasn't helping the feeling of being strangled any.

Ames puttered around the room like an eighty-year old before finally settling down on the edge of the bed, facing away from Alec. The transgenic's fingers curled into the sheets, wanting to strip Ames of his jacket and pull him down alongside him. He waited. Several minutes passed until Ames sighed, rubbed his eyes tiredly and relented, crawling under the sheets, socked feet brushing against Alec's own. And if Alec were a cat, yes, he would purr in contentment. Yeah, so Alec loved Ames just a little bit. So what? It's not like it meant the end of the world. Okay, so maybe it did.

Unless Ames loved him back.

"Scoot over or I'm kicking you out of my bed."

If that wasn't love, then Alec didn't know what was.

FIN