Akatsuki Wedding Planners

I don't own Naruto any of its characters nor do I make any profit from my stories

Deidara slapped a huge binder down on the kitchen table. "Itachi, here it is. The one thing that is going to keep everything super organized for the next 7-9 months, yeah."

"I hope that's what I think it is." Itachi said sitting down at the table.

"If you think this is a binder that contains top secret information from 'the leader' then you're wrong….but if you think this is the 'Itachi and Dana's wedding planner binder' binder then….YOU'RE RIGHT, yeah. I took some of Lola's papers out of it and threw them all over her desk so I could use this binder…I'm sure she won't mind. Hidan overheard this in the background.

"Seriously, Deidara…..what did the papers say that you took out of that binder?" he asked.

"I don't know, something about client's rights and clause 28-A and other stuff that I had no idea what it meant, yeah. Anyway Itachi, it's October and it's time to start making some early plans. Marisol has a binder too, yeah!"

"Wait a minute." Hidan said now joining into this conversation. "Are you saying that you're going to start planning this wedding?"

"Yes! And not just 'we' Hidan….everyone is going to have to contribute something to this wedding, yeah. Oh my god there is nothing more exciting than wedding planning, yeah! There's the flowers, and the tables, and the food, and the music, and the dress, and the cake and the colors, and the…OH MY GOD I CAN'T CONTAIN MYSELF, YEAH!" Deidara said quickly flipping the binder open.

"Hey, has anyone seen Tobi in the past 45 minutes?" Kisame said obviously having been looking for Tobi.

"I gave Tobi very specific instructions to go outside and sweep the patio and then check the pool skimmers." Itachi said.

"Dude, why did you give Tobi that much responsibility?" Hidan asked.

"Well, he did so well last week separating the dark clothes from the white clothes I figured that he was ready for a bigger task." Itachi said.

"Yeah, he did do a good job with that." Kisame said heading outside to search for Tobi.

"Um, Itachi we can't start this whole planning thing, yeah! I'm totally unprepared! Give me twenty minutes…I'll be back, yeah." Before Itachi could ask any questions Deidara had rushed out the front door.

"Didn't he seem all prepared and stuff like 37 seconds ago?" Hidan asked.

"Yeah." Itachi said kind of confused. There was a knock at the door.

"I'll get it! I'll get it! I'll get it! I'll get it!" Tobi yelled as he came running into the living room like a maniac. There was a reason that no one else made it a habit of letting Tobi answer the door…Strange that somehow Tobi had managed to elude Kisame….

"Hi I'm Tobi! I live here, I love answering the door! Who are you? Are you here to…ooooooooooh a box! Oooooooooh another box! Hey look a rock!" The delivery man that was standing at the door ignored Tobi's lack of focus.

"I have a delivery for Lola M. Aagard."

"Hmmmm……I'm not Lola M. Aagard, I'm Tobi! Tobi!" Tobi replied holding his hands up for the boxes. The delivery person sighed.

"Can I leave these packages at this address for Lola Aagard?"

"Oh yes! Yes you can, you can give them to me…..Tobi….and Tobi will give them to Lola!" Tobi started to bounce up and down anticipating the boxes. The delivery man piled up three boxes in Tobi's arms. One was rather large and the other two were smaller. He also laid an envelope on the top. "Thank you! Come back sometime when you have something for me….Tobi!" Tobi said as the delivery man quickly slipped away. Tobi took the packages and put them on the kitchen counter, of course he couldn't resist reading the return address label: Harvard Law School 1563 Massachusetts Ave. Cambridge MA 02138.

"Oh my god! You will never believe this! Me and Dana just finished the first page of the 'Dana and Itachi's Wedding Binder' binder!" Marsiol proclaimed running down the stairs.

"And that is?" Hidan asked.

"Well, it was just the title page…but it's done now!" Marisol said. "Oooooh boxes!" Marisol said spotting the newly arrived delivery. "Harvard Law School…." Marisol thought a moment. "Hey! Lola goes to law school…or something like that. Do you think these are for her!?"

"Something tells me that they are, seriously." Hidan answered her.

"Hey, has anyone seen the ironing board?" Zetsu said in a slight panic.

"You mean it's not in the laundry room where it always is?" Itachi asked.

"No. And I have to find it in the next 5 minutes or Sasori is going to completely blow a gasket. He's about 40 seconds from throwing that stupid printer out the window and he could just completely…..oh my god where the hell is that ironing board! My life is on the line here!" Zetsu ranted.

"Why is he…." Zetsu cut Itachi off.

"This is no time for questions! I need the ironing board now!"

"Fine, come with me I think I know where it is. Itachi said calmly.

"Do you know where Deidara is?" Marisol asked anyone who would answer.

"He yelled about not being ready to plan the wedding, ran out the door like a maniac and that's all we saw of him."

"Oh, okay well tell me when he comes back. I'll be upstairs with Dana because we're getting ready to talk about hairstyles for the wedding." Marisol ran back upstairs.

"Hidan can I speak with you?" Kakuzu yelled from the top of the banister.

"You can talk to me down here. Can't you see I'm getting ready to call everyone on my Jasshin prayer tree?"

"Okay, that is exactly what we need to talk about! You were supposed to run the vacuum in this hallway and instead you're calling all your religious friends." Kakuzu scolded.

"Screw you! You aren't doing anything! You balanced your checkbook like an hour ago! I think you can handle running the vacuum in the hallway!" Hidan argued.

"No! I folded every one of your stupid t-shirts now get your ass up here and RUN THIS VACUUM!"

"Kakuzu! Do something your own damn self for once. God! You're so dependent on me for everything!" Hidan yelled at him.

"OH MY GOD! WILL YOU PEOPLE SHUT THE HELL UP! CAN'T YOU SEE I'M ON THE PHONE! Hi, I'm calling to confirm reservations for Wednesday through Sunday. Yes…..Yes……alright, do I need a confirmation number? Okay……okay…..I'll be taking a cab from the airport in Boston can you give me some detailed directions to the hotel that I can relay to the cab driver?" Sasroi was running frantically back and forth looking for a pen and paper. For some reason people like Deidara had taken all those things off the desk in Sasori's bedroom.

"What the hell is he doing?" Kisame asked. He had recently returned from the Tobi search.

"Who knows." Itachi said. " God! Where the hell is Deidara? He's supposed to be helping me plan MY wedding.!" Itachi was upset. He'd have to deal with it for now….