Disclaimer : I do not own Detective Conan/Magic Kaito. I wish I did though.
It was December, and already the end of another year. He kept on telling himself that he didn't care. But if he was being honest, he really did. Three years had past already. Three years since an arrogant seventeen-year-old adolescent turned into a seven-year-old brat. Three years since one of the most brilliant young detectives disappeared off the surface of the earth, leaving behind him nothing but pain and sorrow to the one he cared the most about.
Conan was now ten, and Shinichi was tired.
Almost thirty-six months of hiding and plotting and lying, and where was he? Still trapped in a child's body. Still hiding and plotting and lying.
Nothing. Had. Changed.
Well.
Maybe a few things.
He was still friends with Ayumi, Mitsuhiko and Genta, but they were not in his class anymore. Only Haibara followed him, as they both moved to two upper classes because Kobayashi-sensei thought they were too clever for their age. If only she knew, right?
The Shonen Tantei was still a thing though. Hell, it worked so well in school that they created an official club to receive missions from their numerous "clients". Most of the time, Shinichi would simply guide the Detective Boys through the investigation by giving them a few hints, before backing away from the whole ordeal.
Playing detective was no longer amusing to him. He wanted to be a detective.
He had also left the Mouri's Agency, along with Ran. She had left the nest a year ago to go study abroad, after a painful phone call with Shinichi during which she left him with an ultimatum. He was either coming back before she was leaving the country or she would move on with her life. After two years and seven random appearances, waiting for him was no longer an option.
"I will always love you, Shinichi," she had said then with a broken voice.
And he had said it back, before she hung up on his broken heart.
Of course, Shinichi never reappeared. And Conan stayed. In his small nine-year-old body, Shinichi watched the love of his life pack her things in a tiny red suitcase, ready to leave him in the past.
"Ran-neechan…" he had whispered while tugging on her skirt as she was about to board her plane.
They shared one last embrace, the sweet girl she was, telling him how much she would miss him there. And that was the end of it. The end of them.
He would receive the occasional phone call from her, mostly as "Conan-kun". She was always happy to talk to Conan, the little charge she took care of for almost two years. But she barely phoned Shinichi.
"It's still too painful," she'd said to him once in a text. And he'd agreed. It was too painful. Heart-breaking. Agonizing. Crushing.
Shinichi, since then, had long moved back to the Kudou mansion. Although, only after Subaru-san decided it was time for him to find his own place to live. Kogoro had barely batted an eyelash at his decision, simply raising his usual can of beer to him with a loud "Take care of yourself, kid". After all, he firmly believed his "freeloader" was moving in with the professor and his school girl friend.
Agasa and Haibara had indeed invited him to stay with them, both knowing how difficult everything had been and still was for him. But he refused. If there was one thing Shinichi didn't want to face, it was the unconscious looks of pity and concern his closest friends would give him.
He was depressed, yes. Utterly devastated, even a year after the break-up. And Haibara still hadn't made any progress on finding the antidote. Conan was still here, and Shinichi seemed forever gone.
He was at his worst. But he kept everything hidden. Locked inside of him, where nobody could see.
Well, one person did. But Shinichi didn't really mind him. After all, he could barely see him. They both shared that same kind of private personality, keeping this unspoken agreement that one would not question the other more than necessary. After all, it was a complete improbability for a detective and a thief to be friends.
Somehow though, Shinichi started to think they were.
"We are not to get deeply involved into each other's affairs," the other had told him that first night, "but I'm a good listener, Tantei-kun."
And listen he did. An entire night. Without uttering a single word. Until dawn came to bring them back to reality. And Conan became a little bit lighter. And Shinichi slowly resurfaced, a shadow of a smile on his child's lips.
Why did KID even make the effort of helping him, though? He couldn't tell for sure. Even after three years of knowing him, Shinichi still had a hard time reading the other's true intentions. The Phantom Thief was really a mystery sometimes, even to the brilliant Heisei Holmes – as they all loved to call him.
However, Shinichi knew he could trust him. KID was one of the few who would only see him for who he really was, an unlucky teenager who ended up being at the wrong place at the wrong time, and was now suffering with the consequences.
Before the shrunken version of himself, before the ridiculous public title he had, before everything other people thought he was, Shinichi was still a teenage guy. A young man with a broken heart. A young man with a broken life.
Someone who needed support before pity, silence instead of awkward conversation… simple companionship.
And KID would always provide it. At least, every night there was a heist.
The Phantom Thief would always leave him with an extra riddle, safely hidden somewhere in the place he was targeting. And Shinichi would decipher it, before heading right away to their lieu of rendez-vous.
These little KID's notes slowly became the only thing keeping him afloat, away from depression. The only thing he was looking forward to.
He no longer bothered giving his time and advice to Inspector Nakamori and the KID's taskforce. After all, he gave up on catching the moonlight magician a long time ago. He knew he wouldn't catch him. Not because he was an elusive thief, no. He wouldn't catch him, because Kaitou KID was just too important to him now.
How ironic, wasn't it? The one unpredictable thing – man in his life was the only stable thing he had going. He could already picture it: wide eyes staring at him as he would stand before them, stating loud and clear how KID The Phantom Thief was his only constant – the only one keeping him from falling into oblivion. And still, they wouldn't understand. Because, really, who cares about the heart of the infamous detective Kudou Shinichi?
If he wasn't feeling so depressed right now, he would have laughed at how ridiculous he sounded. Instead, he just let out a tired sigh escape his lips, staring aimlessly at the city lights surrounding Haido City Hotel.
Before, he would have enjoyed it. Alone and free on this empty rooftop, the cool feel of the wind on his back, silence enveloping him, while he would watch the lights flicker in front of his eyes.
But that was before.
Now, waiting alone on an empty rooftop was only leaving him with too much time to think. And too many things to think about… Ran, Haibara, the Black Organisation, Gin, Vermouth, Ran, that damn pill, Edogawa Conan, the lies, Ran, KID's hang-glider, Ran, and… Why was KID flying away right now? Weren't they supposed to meet here tonight?
Brow furrowed in a deep frown, Shinichi stared at the white triangle fading away in the night, before pulling out the little note he kept in his jacket's pocket. Confused and intrigued, he started reading slowly the puzzle he had deciphered a few hours ago, looking for anything that would tell him he got the wrong place.
But no. He didn't.
KID and Conan were to meet on top of the Haido City Hotel rooftop after the thief's heist, which was a few miles away from the building. He only had time to make sure Nakamori and his police officers were surrounding the place and keeping KID's fans away, before taking off on his skateboard so as to not be late. And now KID was standing him up? Why?
Puzzled, annoyed, and somewhat worried, he placed the note back in his pocket, hopping off the ledge he was previously sitting on, before walking to the exit door.
"No point to linger here. KID's not coming," he whispered to himself, a tinge of disappointment in his voice.
.
.
.
TBC?
Hello Minna-san~
Ok so. First of all, this has been written like...weeks ago? But I couldn't bring myself to post it, because I didn't know (and still dont) where this is going.
That aside, this is so very different from my usual fluffy, cute, funny stories - at least for now, and I hope you enjoyed the read nonetheless! Do not worry, I do not intend to keep the angst... that is if I do continue the story (it could very well end here ^.^")
You know the drill, leave a Kudou or Kuroba, comment like there's no tomorrow - and be ready to get a heartfelt long-ass reply in return ;)
See you next illusion~
Zai.