She is cold . An assassin .
Well , that's what she is , right ?
Wrong .
Behind those beautiful cold eyes lays something hidden so deep that she almost forgot about it .Emotion . Natasha was raised as a cold Russian assassin . She was never allowed to experience a normal childhood , always pushed from one training room to another , hurled into her small room to sleep and abused at any time of day and night . Yes , she learned to stop her weeps and close herself from the hurtful words , but that didn't mean she forgot them.
She was abused . Natasha always tried to erase those memories , but despite her attempts , she always failed . It never ceased to amuse her that the others image of her was so much different from her own . They wanted to be her . They thought she had it all , but they never asked what price she paid for suck 'luck' . If they knew , maybe they would stop pestering her with stupid questions and innuendos that she had no reason to hear of . Hmm , maybe they will be stared , or pity her . That would make it far worse .
Maybe she should tell them the truth ? Well , is she did , what good will it do ? The world wouldn't stop spinning , people wouldn't stop dieing , colors wouldn't melt into black and white . Everything would be as it always was , only with more dangers Natasha may have to face . Yes , she is vulnerable . Maybe even scared . But she will never let her façade crack , she will never give them that satisfaction . She had some pride hidden amongst her cold heart.
Natasha never ceased to fight her inner demons , but deep down she knew that she will lose . And if the fairytales always spoke so highly of good defeating evil , and how that always repeats itself in normal life , Natasha was so close to find and strangle the ones who repeat such stupid , foul words . Why? Maybe she is tired . Maybe she wants to take her revenge , on someone , something , that is completely innocent.
And then , one day , she stepped on the light bulb and everything went downhill . The famous Black Widow was on SHIELD's radar . They wanted to kill her , to punish her for disobeying their orders , for doing things her way . And they knew very well about her bag of tricks. But then the one sent to kill her made a different call . So she fell for a marksman with a heart as cold as hers .
And now , in the middle of this chaos , she sits and talks to the god who stole said marksman from her life and turned him into his favorite play toy . She is angry . And even if it shall take her a decade or even more to bring him back , she will fight with all her will , because no one , not even a god , stands in front of Natasha Romanov when she is set to get something .
And all of this for a marksman that she happened to fall in love with . Not that she will ever admit it to anyone but him .
In the end , in may not even matter …
Ah , finally , and I really mean finally , I write something Avengers related . Wow , it sure did take me a long time !
So , if it confused you , this is supposed to be a angsty drabble about Natasha and her life as an assassin . Uhh , I think I may have made to OOC . Don't kill me please , I promise more !
R&R kind readers , it's all my heart desires .