Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto
Uchiha Sasuke HATED tomatoes. Yep. In no shape or form did he ever like tomatoes. Yep.
Ok, so maybe he ate tomatoes EVERY SINGLE DAY but no. He didn't. He hated tomatoes...despite the fact that he put them on, well, everything in the Kami-damned world. Even chocolate. Yes, you heard me. CHOCOLATE.
Uchiha Sasuke could recite 100 species of tomatoes while sleeping. In a coma he could recite all 15,000+ because let's face it, our consciousness and whatever other crap that resides in your brain always unlocks in a coma and at some point or other in his Ninja career Uchiha Sasuke read the Royal Encyclopaedia of Crap Tons of Tomatoes for Deniers. How he did that with the bloody bloody Uchiha Massacre, the total failure or a Konoha Invasion, Orochimaru's pheodophilic personalities—yes the bash*t insane snake has multiple—and the cluster of total poopiness that was the Fourth Great Shinobi War, oh, and his inner angst and probably-real crush on Naruto—they kissed TWICE, don't give me that look—I have no f*king idea.
But it's probably because of the Sharingan since everyone knows that the Sharingan is a total CHEAT.
And don't even get me started on the Mangekyo!
And true to his word, Uchiha Sasuke did hate tomatoes—he made sure to squish the tiny-teensy bacterial cells' life out of them and dice up the tomatoes and Tsukiyomi whoever sold tomatoes in batches of 3 because there are 3 tomoe in a Sharingan eye and Uchiha Sasuke had a sh*t ton of triggers.
In fact...
RANKING OF UCHIHA SASUKE'S TRIGGERS.
Itachi Uchiha
Itachi Uchiha
Itachi Uchiha
His first kiss
Itachi Uchiha
Naruto Uzumaki
FANGIRLS
ITACHI UCHIHA, KAMI-DAMNIT!
Orochimaru
Fanboys...
Itachi Uchiha
His parents
Rasengan
Tomatoes.
The number 3.
...
...
...
16. FRICKIN' ITACHI UCHIHA (16. That's how far we have gone down to, boys and girls!)
Ok, so tomatoes were quite far down the list but who gives a crap because it's Uchiha Sasuke and—
•••
•••
•••
—Who the heck created the rumour that Uchiha Sasuke liked tomatoes because even I've heard of it because even Uchiha Sasuke hates tomatoes because someidiot created a rumour that Uchiha Sasuke liked tomatoes because even I've heard of it because even Uchiha Sasuke hates tomatoes because some idiot created a rumour that Uchiha Sasuke liked tomatoes because even I've heard of it because even Uchiha Sasuke hates tomatoes because someidiot created a rumour that Uchiha Sasuke liked tomatoes because even I've heard of it because even Uchiha Sasuke hates tomatoes because some idiot created a rumour—
OK, Uchiha Sasuke hates tomatoes.
But out once upon a time he loved them.
AN: This was a plot bunny that jumped into my head and refused to go and everyone please excuse me if this is a bit weird because a. It's my first fanfic, b. I'm sick today and c. I did no research.
Edit: 6 mins after posted, 8 August 2017
caramel-corvus leaves the room to grab a tissue.
