Passing Notes
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and Co. belong to J.K. Rowling.
Author's Note: This story was written before the release of the last two books in the Harry Potter series. Unfortunately, due to circumstances not within my control I was unable to publish it earlier. Since it's a story I enjoyed writing and want others to read as well, please read it, with the knowledge that the result obviously ended out differently than expected. Enjoy!
Cast of Characters Format
Ron
Hermione
Harry
Malfoy
Hey Hermione!
Ron! What is this?
It is a sheet of papyrus paper Bill brought back from Egypt. The enchanted part about is that whoever has a similar copy of this special paper will automatically see what you are writing.
Well, that's very interesting, Ron, but I'm sure you can show this to me some other time.
No, I can't. I might find something important to do later.
Oh and I suppose listening to Binn's lecture about historical events doesn't quality as important.
No, so what you aren't going to reply to me?
Hermione? Hermione-your parents didn't give you a middle name-Granger? Oh, this is ridiculous!
Hey Hermione!
Harry! I see Ron manipulated you into this as well, huh?
No, actually I volunteered. I see, however, that you didn't bother to throw away the KwikNote Paper. Couldn't resist the temptation of not replying, huh?
It's not that, Harry, it's just-
Fascinating?
Tempting?
Unique?
Intriguing?
No! Shut up for one minute so I can reply!
Uh, a long pause here!
It's just distracting.
Distracting!? I beg your pardon, Hermione, but some of the finest geniuses have used this paper to exchange ideas with their silent benefactors.
Oh, if only you could see me rolling my eyes here. Well, who exactly do you say?
Well, Ron and I for starters, and I heard that snort, Mione. And there was Ptolemy, Plato, Aristotle…
And Dumb and Dumber
Ha! Ha! Very funny; remind me to laugh next time. I'm too busy stifling a yawn that seems to be escaping my mouth.
Sorry, the moment was too good to resist. Now if you two geniuses don't mind, I would like to return to listening to Binn's, which is what we should be doing in the first place.
Notes, huh? What's wrong with ours? Hermione?
I see she's giving us the silent treatment again. Well, no problem. She can simply follow this conversation without interrupting.
Yeah, well thanks for letting me join in the fun.
As if I'd leave you out. So are you ready for Friday's match against Slytherin?
I was born ready. Besides there isn't exactly anything distracting my attention this time.
Oh, you mean like Hermione's continuous belief that Quidditch is a waste of time?
Hey, I resent that!
Aha! I knew if we mentioned her name, she'd immediately join in the conversation again.
Ugh! This is all your fault, Ronald Weasley!
Hey, don't glare at me, or at least turn your handwriting against me. It's Bill's fault for lending it to me.
My, my! What do we have here?
Malfoy!
Malfoy!
Malfoy!
What are you doing here?
Using my KwikNote, of course. Good Lord, Weasley, what heroic deed did your brother commit that enable him to purchase such a valuable gift?
For your information, my brother works in Egypt. The minister, himself, allows him to choose his gifts for his family.
Something to be proud of, Weasley? I daresay, there doesn't seem to be much vanity in your family. Not that it needs it, anyway.
Malfoy, who invited you into this conversation?
Well, I was reading some couple pour their hearts out into their words on paper and when that became quite unbearable I simply flipped over to your side.
Well, can't you flip back.
I choose not.
Crabbe and Goyle not joining you in this little venture?
No Potter, they'd have to know how to read and write first before accompanying me on such trips.
Well, why don't you stop writing before your hand gets tired? You wouldn't wan to injure it before Friday's game when Harry will clobber you.
The only person who'll be receiving any injury, Weasley is you, when you are accidentally hit by the Quaffle in your head in yet another futile attempt to save a goal.
Why you little ferret! Why don't you go back into the forest, where you belong?
I may be the ferret but you are definitely a weasel.
Oh enough already, before this turns out into the first violent attack on Malfoy in writing.
No one asked your opinion, you filthy Mudblood.
You
Ron, how could you say such a thing? How could I read such a thing? Oh my God!
Better close your eyes, Hermione. This could get nasty.
I presume you're joining in this ridiculous threat?
I wouldn't call an attack on you ridiculous, and 'Mione, I never left.
For the last time, Malfoy, you've gone long enough. First your father tries to kill, us, now you're going to complete the job for him, but I'm not going to let you take that chance.
What are you going to do? Come and attack me right now during class?
Who ever said anything about right now? How about a little wizard's duel outside in the Quidditch pitch, say tomorrow evening? Unless you're a chicken, of course.
No one calls me a chicken, Potter.
Then, why don't you prove it?
Oh don't worry…I will, Granger. When I'm through with them, you won't have any friends left.
Oh, how touching. Now scram.
Malfoy has left the conversation.
Oh he's so aggravating!
Be careful, Hermione. He could still be reading.
Oh big deal. It's not like he doesn't know already that he's a pompous jackass.
Ronald Weasley, you really must learn to control your tongue.
Yes, I know it's a dreadful habit of mine, but what can one do? If you prefer a more appropriate term of usage, all I can say is good-bye and good riddance-
To bad rubbish, Hermione, do you agree?
Well, I suppose so. But Ron, you didn't really have to challenge Malfoy to a wizard's duel. It's not like he hasn't called me that before.
I know, but just to see him insulting you even on a ridiculous piece of paper…I couldn't control myself, Mione. I hope you'll forgive me.
Oh, I will. Once you return with his lifeless body…
Now that's something you don't hear everyday from Ms. Granger.
Well, you only live life once. But don't think gentlemen, that you're off the hook!
Why? What for?
Someone has to lend me their notes for today's lecture.
Oh, don't worry. A separate part of the KwikNote is that is was accompanied by a Quick-Write Quill. So basically, whatever Binns was tediously saying is being jotted down in full-length as we speak, or write, for that matter.
Oh Ron! This is one of the most brilliant ideas you've ever come up with.
Well, you know me. I can't help being this way.
You mean, in front of Hermione you'd do anything for her.
Don't start Harry Potter, because if you do you won't be the Boy-Who-Lived anymore but the Boy-Who-Once Lived.
What on earth are you two talking about?
Oh Ron knows exactly what I'm talking about.
You know Harry; I do believe this confinement of the classroom is preventing your brain from thinking properly. Why don't you and I step outside so we can breathe some fresh air?
Or do you mean the flames of your devoted heart?
What?
At that moment, the bell rang. Before Ron could lunge at Harry, he had already managed to escape into the crowd, but with Ron close at his heel. She shook her head and contemplated what she had just heard as she joined the throng of students.