A/N: Welcome to my second ever attempt at fluff, and second ever attempt at Destiel! This story is quite ridiculous, so I hope you're ready for a(n absurdly) fun ride. Also I find the Kevin/Charlie/Sam friendship-family dynamic really entertaining [everyone is alive and happy together because this is a fluff universe of rainbows and joy], so there's going to be quite a bit of that. Along with of course quite a bit of Dean/Cas adorableness. Enjoy!
"Do you think he knows?"
Charlie placed her tea mug on the counter with a heartfelt farewell, then turned to face Kevin as he entered the kitchen. She wasn't quite sure why he'd suddenly decided to speak in a whisper, but she figured she might as well play along.
"Do I think who knows what?" she asked, and Kevin gave a small jerk of his chin in the direction of the long table they used for research and dining. Sam sat surrounded by dusty old tomes, his back and shoulders hunched as he poured over the books' contents. With the way he devoured every text in sight even when they weren't on a case, Charlie was pretty sure Sam probably knew everything, including whatever mystery trivia Kevin was alluding to.
"Do you think he knows about Cas," Kevin elaborated in an excited whisper, and Charlie gave him a slight frown.
"What about Cas? Do you mean the guinea pig he's secretly kept in his room and feeds the fruits and vegetables that he picks up at the farmer's market when he thinks no one will notice he's gone?" she asked, and Kevin gave her a blank stare before shaking his head.
"No that's not what I'm-wait, how long has Cas had a pet guinea pig? And why is it secret?"
"Not long, maybe two weeks. He didn't want Dean to tell him pets weren't allowed in the bunker and to make him get rid of it," Charlie explained, retrieving her tea and taking a quick moment to welcome it back home.
"Oh. Ok. But that's not what I'm asking about," he insisted after a short pause. "Do you think Sam knows about Cas and Dean - about all the stuff he told us a few days back."
"Right," Charlie said with a firm nod. "No idea," she continued with an equally confident shake of her head. "But we could always just ask him," she suggested with a shrug, exiting the kitchen and heading over to where Sam was seated before Kevin could protest.
"I don't know if that's the best idea," Kevin hissed as he hurried after her, but Charlie dismissed his comment with a casual wave.
"How bad could it be," she whispered over her shoulder, before pushing aside a leather-bound text and plopping down on the tabletop beside Sam. Kevin lingered behind him, making frantic hand gestures and facial expressions while mouthing "stop now this is a horrible idea".
Charlie ignored him.
"Hullo, Sammy," she greeted, giving his arm a nudge with her knee, and he looked up at her with a tired but pleasant smile.
"Hey, how's it going, guys," he replied, turning in his seat to offer Kevin a nod as well.
"Swell," Kevin told him, discreetly beckoning Charlie away from the table. "We just wanted to, you know, make sure you were doing ok over here with all these...books. Can never have enough books, am I right? Uhm, anyway, we should probably get out of your hair and leave you to your-"
"Kevin wanted me to ask if you knew about Cas," Charlie blurted, instantly stealing Sam's attention away from the fumbling and bumbling prophet.
"About Benvolio? His guinea pig?" Sam asked, and Charlie shook her head.
"Ok how am I the only one who didn't know about the guinea pig?" Kevin interrupted, and Charlie merely shrugged. Of all people, she would have thought think the bunker's resident vegetarian would be the one to notice the sudden abundance of fresh produce that no remembered purchasing. Apparently she'd given Kevin's observation skills alittle too much credit.
"Well you've still got two over on Dean," Sam offered in consolation. "He doesn't know about the secret pet, or that Cas is in love with him."
Kevin's mouth opened and closed uselessly for a moment, and Charlie sat up a bit straighter in triumph; her direct approach of "ask and you shall recieve" had been proven successful once again.
"What, you thought I didn't know?" Sam asked with a baffled laugh. "Of course I knew! How could I not? I mean, I've been the one living with both of them for what - almost five years? And it's only gotten worse since they came back from purgatory," Sam told them. "Even before Cas confirmed it, it was written all over his face whenever he and Dean were in the same room. Sometimes even when they weren't. Written all over both their faces, really." Sam trailed off, and Kevin came forward to take the seat next to him.
"So you think Dean feels the same way?" Kevin asked, and Sam pursed his lips with a shrug. Not a definite yes, but a far cry from a no.
"Dean hasn't said anything to you guys about it, has he?" Kevin continued, and Charlie and Sam both just looked at him.
"Right, stupid question. But if Cas refuses to come right out and say it, and Dean is being...Dean...then how is this ever going to go anywhere?"
"It's not," Sam sighed, running his hands over his face before pushing them back through his hair. "They're just going to keep going around each other in circles, and spend the rest of their lives wondering why they can't be happy instead of just fucking doing something about it." He let out a huff of frustration, throwing himself back into his chair. "It's just so fucking stupid," he grumbled to himself, and Charlie offered him a sip of her tea in consolation.
"It doesn't have to be all melodramatic stares and longing for each other's touch for all eternity," Charlie commented, warming her hands on her mug when Sam turned down her offer.
"You're using your "I've got an ingenious plan that will solve everything" voice," Kevin said, leaning forward in his chair with his attention now fully focused on Charlie. "Share your wisdom, Great One," he added with a small bow.
"Oh stop it, you're too much" Charlie told him, deeping her voice to an acceptable diva baritone and batting away his comment as she mimed tossing a feather boa over her shoulder.
"Can you two save your All About Eve renditions for later?" Sam asked, and Charlie gave a small smile of apology before getting back on track.
"All we have to do is just counsel Cas and help him drop little hints to Dean until he finally realizes what's going on," she told them.
"Or not-so-little hints," Sam corrected. "My brother has always been stubborn, but he's dug himself extra deep into denial on this one."
"What if Dean still doesn't notice?" Kevin asked, and Charlie paused before answering.
"We'll have to try and coax him into it. Nudge him in the right direction and help him accept it even as Cas makes it clear that any of Dean's advances would be welcome."
"This would be so much easier if Cas was willing to make the first move," Sam huffed.
"Well yeah but imagine how torn up he'd be if things went wrong. He doesn't want to risk it, and honestly I don't blame him," Kevin argued, and Sam conceded with a nod.
"You're right. I just wish they could figure it out on their own. But it's been five years and they still haven't gotten anywhere."
"Which is why they're in luck, now that Team Cupid is on the case!" Charlie said with an emphatic toast of her tea mug.
Sam flinched away from a splash of the hot amber liquid that sloshed out of her cup, and Kevin let out a bark of laughter at her words.
"Good god, please tell me that's not what you're going to call this thing," Kevin cried, his mirth stuck somewhere between horror and amusement.
"What, you don't like it? Ok, how about The Love Squad?" she amended, and Kevin's face twisted as if he'd had his finger sliced off by a power-hungry future king of hell.
"What do you think, Sam? Maybe...Operation Celestial Romance!"
"I think if you stay in charge of names, I'm dropping out immediately," Sam told her with a laugh of his own as he pushed back his chair and climbed to his feet.
"You both have no sense of poetry," she said with a haughty lift of her chin as she hopped down from the table, and Kevin rolled his eyes.
"Don't you think naming it makes it a bit more suspicious?" Sam called over his shoulder as he headed into the kitchen and pulled a six-pack from the fridge. "Dean's going to start digging around if we start referring to Club Lovesick and he doesn't know what it is."
"That's true," Charlie sighed, declining the beer Sam offered her.
"Hey, what about me?" Kevin called out as Sam took a bottle for himself and returned the others to the refrigerator.
"Yeah, what about you?" Sam asked, and he arched an eyebrow when Kevin gestured towards the refrigerator.
"You didn't offer me a beer!" he explained, clearly wounded by the slight.
"You're underage," Sam pointed out, barely holding back a smile as Kevin gaped at him in disbelief.
"You are the most hypocritical giant moose-man I have ever met," he huffed like a flustered old woman as he pushed past Sam jerked open the fridge. He slammed the top against the door, not bothering to use a bottle opener, before taking a large swig.
"You two are ridiculous," Sam said with an affectionate shake of his head before he vacated the kitchen and returned to his reading.
"Dude, you don't even like beer," Charlie pointed out as Kevin took another swallow, his nose wrinkling in distaste.
"I'm drinking it on a matter of principle," Kevin insisted, his voice tight, and Charlie hoped he'd heard how idiotic his own words sounded.
"It's a point of stupidity," Sam called from the other room, and Charlie grinned as Kevin let out a dismayed hiccup.
A/N: Next chapter Cas joins the crew in a non-sleepover sleepover. Also there are onesies involved. This is not something you'll want to miss.