Percy Jackson and the Olympians: A Fanfic
Hi, I'm William Stonecrusher, and I'm a son of Poseidon. Now a few years ago that would have been a BIG problem. But now a day's most people can accept the fact that my dad can't keep it in his pants. Ever since the Titan War new demigod children of, and I air quote here, "The Big Three." Have been popping up here and there in a manner as too suggest that if Kronos had bothered too look he would have found at least 12 sons and daughters of Zeus, 5 sons and daughters of Hades, and… me. Being the son of the "Earthshaker" and what not, I would think he rocked a few more worlds than he did but my existence was finalized by nothing more than a one night stand in an Irish pub alleyway, with my dad drunk off his ass from challenging an Irish mortal too a drinking contest… and losing. As far as I know my only mortal sibling is another demigod named Percy Jackson, the hero of the titan war. And while this earns me irrefutable bragging rights I would enjoy having a sister too pick on or a little brother too mold into a mini me.
Now you may be thinking… "Hey Will, what about the Cyclops's?" Well, and don't quote me here, they don't count. They're useful weapon smiths but they are as dense as the rocks they can lift.
Anyway enough of my kvetching, time too get too my story. I knew I was special from as early on as I could remember. How special escaped me until a satyr came for me too spirit me away too Camp Halfblood. Since then I have learned 5 things. 1. That I smell like a strawberry daiquiri too the monsters of the world, I have mad skillz with spears and polearms in general, 3. Daughters of Aphrodite are amazing in bed, 4. If there is an undeniable monstrous presence in or around a building there is major fun too be had there, and 5. Guns don't kill people, MONSTERS with guns kill people.
These lessons have been invaluable too me in the 17 years I have lived and still hold fast now. My home cabin, or more specifically me and my brothers home cabin, is situated in good ol' Camp Halfblood, where virginity goes too die (What? With all these teenagers stuck in cabins with nothing but woods and secluded glades for miles around, and constantly getting all sweaty and hot while sparring, you seriously didn't think that people wouldn't be going down on each other?) , on the far right of a row of cabins that has come too be known as "The Big Threesome." A phrase that never fails too sparks my imagination. I don't know how the name started but it stuck. So here I am, an Irish son of Poseidon, at the greatest camp in the known universe. I have a beautiful girlfriend, a great brother, and loads of friends. All of that was about too change however. Because every hero needs a quest.