AN: Well hey there all... I hope you're all doing okay. If not, I'm here to talk it through. I think that last episode gave us all a serious bout of slit-your-wrists depression, so I figure, why not join on the bandwagon and post a one-shot. So, here's my version of what I think was going through Kensi's mind during the exchange.
As always, thanks Fern (Bamie02)! And, if you want something slightly more uplifting, check out her new one-shot, coming soon!
Blessings,
bookdiva
The Pashto flew by her at a speed that she couldn't have comprehended, even at 100%. The words became a distant buzz in her mind as it started to wander.
As was common - especially in the last several hours - her mind landed on one thing: everything.
His smile. His laugh. His eyes. Fern. Sugarbear. Kensalina. Kiki. Touché. Home.
She was literally yanked from her thoughts as an unfamiliar man pulled her roughly to her feet. She understood exactly one word.
"Exchange."
She felt a small hope welling up inside her. Maybe Granger had found a way to get her out. Maybe she'd be able to go home and see him again.
She pushed the thought away as quickly as it had popped into her mind. She took a deep, shaky breath and used the last of her strength to put one foot in front of the other.
Step. Step. Step. Step. Step.
She didn't look up until she was almost there, and when she finally did, what she saw almost caused her to collapse right there.
Because standing in front of her, gun pressed into the back of an elderly man, was her partner. His blonde hair was peeking out from under his local hat, and it hid his eyes from her.
She didn't look at him for more than a second, but it was enough. The guilt overwhelmed her.
It was all she could do to make it to the helicopter before her legs collapsed from under her. Her physical pain, however, had nothing on the ache in her heart.
She collapsed straight into Jack's arms, and he pulled her the final feet into the waiting helicopter.
At that moment, all her pain and guilt overwhelmed her, and she succumbed to it. She didn't think it could get any worse than that, but then she shifted in Jack's arms and saw her partner staring into the helicopter - straight at her.
And she shut down.
Because, at that moment, she saw his eyes, and it brought back all the memories of leaving him tied to that damn chair.
And yet, here he was. In Afghanistan. In the desert. In a warzone. For her.
At the debrief, she learned where he'd been – vaguely, as he'd been surprisingly silent - and that he'd been ordered away from the immediate rescue team. And yet, somehow, he'd still been the one who'd rescued her.
Him.
Not Callen or Sam or Granger or any one of the men with the automatic rifles. He saved her.
And she knew, without a doubt, that no matter the orders or obstacles, he'd never leave her tied up in that damn chair.