Lindsay Comes Home

DL - This is what goes on in my head with some of JB's characters since he and the writers like stringing us along. His characters, my imagination. DL

This was so hard to finish. I just didn't have it in me to write anymore. This is my first, and probably last, fanfic.

This story occurs after Lindsay returns from Montana. DL, of course. Smut-free. This is my first fanfic. I'd love some reviews. Go ahead. I can take it.

He put his beer down and lowered the volume of the baseball game he'd been watching. "All I wanted was a beer, a game, and some rest," he thought. He got up and trudged over to the door, hoping that whoever it was would give up and leave before he arrived.

"WHO IS IT??" he said gruffly. In New York, you can't be too inviting to strangers at your door.

A sweet, familiar voice said, "Montana."

He began to sweat immediately. His face turned red, and he was suddenly aware of his sloppy appearance. He was wearing an undershirt and jeans. Fortunately, he showered before leaving work, so at least he smelled nice, although he hadn't bothered to do much with his mousy hair.

He was caught between making himself presentable or letting her in and letting her see him as he presently was. He thought better of making her wait and he unlocked and opened the door.

"Hi, Danny," she said with a nervous smile.

"Montana. When did you get back?" He wanted to throw his arms around her, but he knew that would not have been received well. He didn't know why she was here, but he wasn't going to be the reason she left.

"Ohhhhh…" she looked at her watch, "about two hours ago." She looked from his eyes to his chest and back to his eyes numerous times, more out of nervousness than anything. At once, her doubts began to overtake her. "Do you have company? I should have called…"

"NO!" he interjected. He wanted her to stay. "I was just passing time drinking a beer and watching a game. I could use some company." He opened the door to let her in.

She took in her surroundings as much as her anxiety would let her. He led her to the couch and she sat at the far end, with her back against the arm.

Danny was still aware of his appearance. He hadn't seen Lindsay in a month and he was not making a good impression. "Just let me put on a shirt."

"Why? I'm enjoying the view." She certainly didn't come to flirt, but how could she help herself?

He couldn't wipe the cocky grin Lindsay had just put on his face. "Want something to drink?"

"What do you have?"

"Beer, wine, and water."

"Wine, please," she said with a smirk.

He went to the kitchen and returned a couple of minutes later with a bottle of wine and a couple of wine glasses. He placed them on the coffee table and sat down so that they were facing each other. She managed to maintain eye contact with him.

"I…ummm…I was hoping you had a little time. You told me that if I ever needed to talk…"

"I have all the time in the world." He looked straight into her eyes with a look that showed his concern and told her that she had his full attention. His constant gaze bore into her soul.

She gave a half smile and her eyes drifted to the muted baseball game on his television. She knew how much of a baseball fanatic he was.

"You can finish watching your game. I'll wait."

He reached for the remote and turned off the television.

"Talk."

The next two hours were filled with her recap of the murder of her friends in high school, the guilt she felt about being the only survivor, the desperately anguished mothers of her deceased friends, and the trial. She detailed the forensic evidence that finally brought the killer to justice. She also told him about her ambivalence about the fact that he received the death penalty.

As Danny listened, he went on an emotional roller coaster ride with her, but his peaks and valleys were more extreme, as indicated by his erratic breathing pattern. She told the story with a bit of detachment. Her eyes welled with tears, sometimes tears flowed, but not much. The trial had forced her to face her past head on. She left most of her tears and some of her fears in Montana. She had no control over whether or not she had to testify, but in doing so she regained control of her life. Her home state was no longer defined by that one tragic moment. Her longing to visit her family there was no longer hampered by her unwillingness to revisit the past.

Danny could tell that she was a changed woman. She allowed herself to feel and to share those feelings freely with him. It finally hit Danny that the greatest and best change in her was that she actually trusted him to tell him about her past. This is good.

He was still confused about what all of this meant. Why did she come to him? She had obviously dropped her bags off at home and made tracks to his place. He was the first thing on her mind. Did this mean she was ready…. He wouldn't even allow himself to think about that. Focus, Danny, focus.

They laughed, they drank, they skirted around the one issue that was on their minds. Meanwhile, Danny caught her up on the goings-on in the lab as well as the latest gossip – thanks to the ever-prolific grapevine, Flack. He even filled her in on some of Sid's pointless, nauseating flashbacks.

Lindsay could have used a hug when she saw him. She could have used much more than that, but she knew better than to let her mind wander there. She wondered why he didn't make any physical contact. He hadn't held her hand, he hadn't flirted. He didn't show any emotion at all, beyond being self-conscious about his lack of a shirt. Oh, no! He's moved on!

It finally hit her that she rejected him, kept him at arm's length, left without saying goodbye in person, and was gone for a month. After all of that, how could she expect him to wait for her?

She didn't regret making a beeline for his place and telling him what she told him, but she had to make a quick exit. But before she could come up with a plan, he asked, "You hungry?"

She didn't need much prodding to stay. You're so easy, Lindsay. "What do you have?"

"Fried spiders and chutney dip." They both laughed. "We can eat here or go somewhere."

"We can stay in. As much as I want to get reacquainted with this city, I'm too tired to move."

"Skyline over wheat fields, Montana?" He grinned and she couldn't help but smile in return. "I'll call in an order. Chinese okay?"

"Yeah, I'm starving. Anything's fine. I refused to pay extra for airplane food." He chuckled at her comment and headed to the phone to place their order. When he hung up he said, "I'll get dressed while we wait. Don't want you gettin' all hot and bothered 'cause I'm underdressed." Lindsay's eyes widened. She wondered if he was guessing or if he really knew what she was thinking.

He went into his bedroom for what seemed like an eternity to Lindsay. What is he doing in there? When he emerged, she saw that he had not only changed his clothes (and he's looking mighty fine, mind you), but he'd also done something with his hair. Who would've thought? Messer's high maintenance. He now sported black slacks and a blue button down shirt. 'I hope I didn't overdo it,' he thought.

Lindsay looked at him and blinked. He's trying to kill me. Danny couldn't read her face, as it was blank. She just continued to blink and she finally looked away. Then he noticed the crimson rising in her cheeks. It was then that he realized that she was still interested.

Lindsay decided to go on a fishing expedition. "Soooo, how's your life been, Messer?"

"I just filled you in on everything at the lab."

"I mean how's your life been? You don't live at the lab, you know."

He sighed heavily and said, "That's the only life I have now." He paused momentarily. "Since I'm still waiting for someone to work through some issues."

"You mean you're not seeing anyone?" she asked incredulously and breathlessly.

"Lindsay," he sighed as he removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes. His eyes were downcast; then they closed as he exhaled heavily. He put his glasses back on and looked Lindsay in the eye. "Lindsay, I haven't seen anyone for the past few months. I know that I denied that I wanted a relationship with you, but I do want one. With you. I'm not looking for a replacement. There is no replacement for you. You have spoiled me for all other women, Montana. I want to get to know you better…inside and out. I want to know everything about you."

At this point, Lindsay became overwhelmed with emotion and her watery eyes began to release tears when she closed them softly and said, "I'm ready."