A/N: Hey everyone! I just wanted you to know that this is my first fan fiction using Fruits basket characters. Just to let you know. I don't own anything, I'm just hoping

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PS: I need a beta reader…blush

Complex to touch

Do you ever get the feeling when you're missing something and you don't know what it is? I'm having this feeling right now. I don't know what I could be missing. I have great friends, nice family and gorgeous boyfriend.

I love Yuki with all my heart. I like the way he smiles, I like the way he treats me like a queen, I like the way he's never violent or loud, well except towards Kyo. I can't help the fact that they hate each other.

We started dating a month after Akito's death. I know everyone saw it coming, I guess I did too. I mean we were meant to be right? The way he was looking at me, the way he always protected me. We were meant to be, right?

It's been now…I don't know…three years since that day since he kissed me at our secret base.

I'm now twenty years old and I'm still living with the Sohma family. My life is great and I'm thankful for it.

Anyway it's Saturday and I need to check the laundry.

I enter Kyo's room. I haven't seen him for two and a half months. I still don't know why he went to college so far away, while he could stay here.

I always knew he was not the cleaning person, but this room is a mess.

I was picking up his clothes when my hand bumped into something. I picked up one of his black shirts and an old book was found.

I opened it and the first picture was picture of Yuki sleeping behind his study desk, the second one was me and Ayame fighting about dinner.

You see there was one time, a while ago when he decided not to eat meat so I needed to cook something else and he wouldn't tell me what…

I was amazed about details, how he remembered every detail every expression and every wrinkle. He was talented.

The more pages I turned around the more it started to get weird. They were all of me. Me cooking, me studying, me cleaning, me sleeping…

The last page was me and Yuki kissing. Our eyes were closed and I had one hand in his hair while the second one was around his waist. It was Valentines Day, last year.

But on the edge of the page was a sentence…too complex to love

"Having a good time?"

Shit, I look up and meet eyes with obviously pissed of Kyo. He just came out of bathroom, wearing nothing but baggy jeans.

Shriver runs through me as my eyes travel down his body. I like Yuki's perfectly lithe and pale body, without any harsh or noticeable muscles, but this…perfectly tanned and shaped, I wonder how it would feel…

"Are you done starring? I don't know how Yuki would feel, knowing his girlfriend spent quite some time drooling over poor Kyo"

"Well…I…I…was just cleaning house and I just thought, that since you just came home I could…"

"You can stop babbling now; it's just me you know. What are you having the…"

He looks at the sketch book I'm holding. It's noticeable that he's trying to breathe, but there doesn't seem to be enough air in here.

"Di…did…did you see what's in it?"

"Yes" I replied in a broken voice "I'm sorry Kyo…I didn't know…I really didn't know, if you just said anything back then, than maybe…"

"Maybe what Tohru? Would you feel sorry for me and give me one chance I would probably screw up, would you go running to Yuki, that Kyo still wants something from you, even after you saved him from Akito…"

"Why are you so cruel to me?" I started crying "Kyo I never wanted you to feel this way, I never wanted you to hurt…"

"Well you did! I think that makes one mistake in your life, doesn't it? You can't love everyone, can you? I never wanted anything from you!"

"And that's it, isn't it? No one wants anything from me, but me, isn't that right Kyo?"

He grabs my wrists roughly and pushes me on his bed. He stands as I sit and he looks at me like I'm something sacred or something so beautiful he's too afraid to touch again.

"Tohru…you know it was never meant to be this way. I knew our destiny, I mean I knew and I still do that you belong with Yuki. It just made me so angry, you know, when you two started going out. The way he smiled at you, expressions on his face when you did something silly…things like that. It was the fact that you were so happy with him that made me go away, hide, run… I always knew you would be never so happy with anyone else."

"Kyo…"

"No, don't say anything. I know you don't love me the way I love you. And it hurts, you know… knowing that you could very well break me in any way possible and I would still be here, hoping that you would leave him and pick up my shattered pieces…glue them together somehow."

I smiled, I never knew how he felt until know. I'm proud that I'm the one he has just open up to, even if I'm the one that's hurting him.

"Would you like to kiss me?"

"Wha…what are you talking about? I won't kiss you, do you want me dead or what. You know the rat would kil…

"Would you like to kiss me Kyo? It's just one kiss. We won't tell Yuki and it's the smallest thing I can do for you, accept it…like an apology."

I couldn't look at him. I just closed my eyes. His hands hold mine, snaking up my arms, tickling me, stroking me, dancing across my skin until I could feel myself flushing, and hear my heartbeats were shuddering in my ears.

Everywhere he touched me, I could feel my skin tingling, burning, even though his skin was cold. Like I'd wanted this for so long. I could barely breathe. He'd reached my shoulders now, and his fingers had slipped under my top, brushing my collarbones with his thumbs, moving up my neck, sliding his fingers into my hair, cupping my face, tilting it upwards. My heart thrumming wildly, every nerve in my body prickling, I opened my eyes just as his lips brushed mine.

For a moment, the world hung frozen. Between heartbeat and heartbeat we stared at each other, the air of the night and the dim, icy starlight glimmering in his eyes.

And then he bent his head back down and opened my mouth with his, and the shock and the joy and the pleasure soared through me as his hands left my face and trailed back down my neck, one cradling my head, the other slipping down across my stomach and up under my shirt. I broke away, gasping, fighting the urge to laugh uncontrollably, and threw my arms around him, burying my nose in his shoulder, finding his neck with my mouth and kissing it again and again, clinging to him desperately as his hands found their way everywhere, running along my back, stroking my chest, pulling my hair loose…

"Wait…wait Tohru…"

It's the sound of my name that pulls me out of this unnatural feeling of being alive. I don't know what happened in this past moment, but I don't want it to stop…ever…

"Now I know how it feels like to be yours . . . why did I have to like it?"

I look at him and it hits me. This kiss was way out of road. We gave in and I think he knew we would, that's why he was so scared of it before it even happened.

I ran away, I needed to hide and think about it…I needed to get away from this unreal insanity.

A/N: Want me to continue? Just let me know…R&R

Stay gorgeous

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