Warning: this story has been thought of and written down in extremely
boring Math-Lessons and with a high sugar-M&M in the author's bodies.
Disclaimer: Sheet and Pillow are mine. X-Men not. Marvel's.
***
Of Sheets and Pillows.
***
The clock was saying 0:23 past midnight. I was awake. As usual, because sheets don't *really* sleep. I was covering my favorite, Gambit, that French person, I believe his name is 'Romy' or something. I started to rub his stressed shoulders. So tense. On the other hand, he did have a Danger Room session this evening.
While rubbing, I pondered about my other favorites. Especially Storm. She always slept naked and was so very clean. Probably due her rain-showers. She takes those, you know. I don't like Beast though. He *always* sheds blue fur. I always get so hairy. Kurt (or 'Elf' or 'Crawler?) on the other hand, always takes baths. Never sheds. So very clean. I love sleeping on him. His tail is so great. My best friend.
I do so not like Jean and Scott. Yuck. When they do *it* they always get dirty spots on my. White and Icky. And when it's her time of the month, I get red spots! Do you know how hard it is to get blood out of a white sheet? I had to wash three times!
I like Betsy and Angel. I was shocked when they broke up. They always put me on the floor when they do *it*, so no spots at all. Warren's wings are awfully nice and Betsy always washes me by hand. Mmm--- Recently I have been touching their *spots*, hoping it might leads to something.
I also favor Marrow. She recently has gotten a cat and I play a lot with him. Like, I wiggle my ends or sneak on it from behind. Or we do a group hug, Sam (the cat), me and Marrow. Of course, I do all this without their knowing. If the humans found out, I would be breaking Object Code Number One. I can't even move in their sight, or I'll have to kill them. Which I won't. (remember, the blood spots)
Jamie, on the other hand, is a whole matter entirely, really. He's a cute boy, really, but he has dreams. Mostly nightmares. And, as an instant reflex on those nightmares, he multiplies himself. Like, TEN times. And they'll all pull at me, tussle with me and try to take me all for themselves. I'm always *so* stretched when I have slept there.
Rogue's okay, I guess. She has lots of stuffed animals (and a stuffed Gambit) on her bed and I play lots of hide-and-seek with them and we also play tag! And Rogue is a nice girl and always smells nice, but when we make skin-to-sheet contact I faint, always, no exception at all and wake up the next morning, like she drains my life-force or something. What is up with that?
And then we have the bald guy, Xavier or something. He is so disgusting! He always wets the bed, on purpose! Ew! I always get wet, icky, smelly, ew. Really. It's like he doesn't want to get out of bed (not that I blame him, I'm warm and cozy) but still! Ew! Just gross!
And last, but not least, we have *that great* Iceman. He is the worst. At first, he sweats the entire night, I mean, come on, I'm warm, but not that warm! And then, when he wakes, he freezes up, while in the bed! And since I'm wet (the sweat, Yech) I freeze up, I get stiff and cold! Brrr---
Oh! Got to stop my musings. Romy dreams. 'Bout Rogue. He does this a lot. Especially since Antarctica. Whatever that is. Maybe it's the meat in the back of the refrigerator. Nobody tells me anything. Anyway, when he dreams about Rogue, he often cries and starts to shake uncontrollably, and then I always hug him and rock him tenderly. It consoles him, really.
So, done. Now I can sneak away to meet my fiancée, Pillow. I proposed to her last night. She's going to answer this night. Hold it! Wait! Got to close the window. Or else Romy might get a cold, we can't have that.
So I slowly sneaked out of Romy's room and--- Hay! A door opening. Got to hide in the laundry basket. It's Betsy, sneaking in Angel's room. With her tight, purple outfit. Her *special* outfit. Victory! Victory!
A soon as she was in, I slowly crawled further, to Logan's room. I like Logan. He sleeps on HER. Pillow is black, with white little dots. She is *so* cute! And Logan sleeps heavy, mumbling Sabretooth. Doesn't matter at all.
"Pillow!"
"Sheet?"
She tucked from under Logan's head, which (okay, not that) softly landed on the bed.
"What's your answer?"
"What does Sheet want Pillow to say?"
"What do you think?"
"Yes, Pillow wants to marry you, Sheet."
Then, suddenly, Logan sleepwalked. Sleep-attacked actually. He let out his claws and ripped Pillow apart. I heard her screams! Pillow! Pillow!!!
***
Logan woke up, at two past midnight, in the remaining parts of his pillow. Oops. He was hungry, so he went down for some milk and cookies. Walking down the stairs, he heard a muffled sound. He looked, but saw nothing. Odd. Maybe a rat.
As soon as he opened the fridge, he heard the muffle again. As soon as he turned around, all kinds of napkins grabbed several body parts. Then a lot of spoons bounced of his head. Logan, trying to avoid the brutal attack, stepped back. Suddenly, a giant sheet appeared before him and strangled him. And he could have sworn he could here it saying: "Murderer!"
***
Storm entered the kitchen, immediately noticing the big, dirty pile of napkins and spoons.
"Godess, what has happened here?"
She grabbed in the pile, revealing a big, white, dirty sheet.
"Who has done this? Anyway, let's get you hand-washed, little, innocent sheet---"
***
~End of this episode~
Don't forget to review!
A Cris-X Story, in cooperation with Lady_of_the_Dawn.
Disclaimer: Sheet and Pillow are mine. X-Men not. Marvel's.
***
Of Sheets and Pillows.
***
The clock was saying 0:23 past midnight. I was awake. As usual, because sheets don't *really* sleep. I was covering my favorite, Gambit, that French person, I believe his name is 'Romy' or something. I started to rub his stressed shoulders. So tense. On the other hand, he did have a Danger Room session this evening.
While rubbing, I pondered about my other favorites. Especially Storm. She always slept naked and was so very clean. Probably due her rain-showers. She takes those, you know. I don't like Beast though. He *always* sheds blue fur. I always get so hairy. Kurt (or 'Elf' or 'Crawler?) on the other hand, always takes baths. Never sheds. So very clean. I love sleeping on him. His tail is so great. My best friend.
I do so not like Jean and Scott. Yuck. When they do *it* they always get dirty spots on my. White and Icky. And when it's her time of the month, I get red spots! Do you know how hard it is to get blood out of a white sheet? I had to wash three times!
I like Betsy and Angel. I was shocked when they broke up. They always put me on the floor when they do *it*, so no spots at all. Warren's wings are awfully nice and Betsy always washes me by hand. Mmm--- Recently I have been touching their *spots*, hoping it might leads to something.
I also favor Marrow. She recently has gotten a cat and I play a lot with him. Like, I wiggle my ends or sneak on it from behind. Or we do a group hug, Sam (the cat), me and Marrow. Of course, I do all this without their knowing. If the humans found out, I would be breaking Object Code Number One. I can't even move in their sight, or I'll have to kill them. Which I won't. (remember, the blood spots)
Jamie, on the other hand, is a whole matter entirely, really. He's a cute boy, really, but he has dreams. Mostly nightmares. And, as an instant reflex on those nightmares, he multiplies himself. Like, TEN times. And they'll all pull at me, tussle with me and try to take me all for themselves. I'm always *so* stretched when I have slept there.
Rogue's okay, I guess. She has lots of stuffed animals (and a stuffed Gambit) on her bed and I play lots of hide-and-seek with them and we also play tag! And Rogue is a nice girl and always smells nice, but when we make skin-to-sheet contact I faint, always, no exception at all and wake up the next morning, like she drains my life-force or something. What is up with that?
And then we have the bald guy, Xavier or something. He is so disgusting! He always wets the bed, on purpose! Ew! I always get wet, icky, smelly, ew. Really. It's like he doesn't want to get out of bed (not that I blame him, I'm warm and cozy) but still! Ew! Just gross!
And last, but not least, we have *that great* Iceman. He is the worst. At first, he sweats the entire night, I mean, come on, I'm warm, but not that warm! And then, when he wakes, he freezes up, while in the bed! And since I'm wet (the sweat, Yech) I freeze up, I get stiff and cold! Brrr---
Oh! Got to stop my musings. Romy dreams. 'Bout Rogue. He does this a lot. Especially since Antarctica. Whatever that is. Maybe it's the meat in the back of the refrigerator. Nobody tells me anything. Anyway, when he dreams about Rogue, he often cries and starts to shake uncontrollably, and then I always hug him and rock him tenderly. It consoles him, really.
So, done. Now I can sneak away to meet my fiancée, Pillow. I proposed to her last night. She's going to answer this night. Hold it! Wait! Got to close the window. Or else Romy might get a cold, we can't have that.
So I slowly sneaked out of Romy's room and--- Hay! A door opening. Got to hide in the laundry basket. It's Betsy, sneaking in Angel's room. With her tight, purple outfit. Her *special* outfit. Victory! Victory!
A soon as she was in, I slowly crawled further, to Logan's room. I like Logan. He sleeps on HER. Pillow is black, with white little dots. She is *so* cute! And Logan sleeps heavy, mumbling Sabretooth. Doesn't matter at all.
"Pillow!"
"Sheet?"
She tucked from under Logan's head, which (okay, not that) softly landed on the bed.
"What's your answer?"
"What does Sheet want Pillow to say?"
"What do you think?"
"Yes, Pillow wants to marry you, Sheet."
Then, suddenly, Logan sleepwalked. Sleep-attacked actually. He let out his claws and ripped Pillow apart. I heard her screams! Pillow! Pillow!!!
***
Logan woke up, at two past midnight, in the remaining parts of his pillow. Oops. He was hungry, so he went down for some milk and cookies. Walking down the stairs, he heard a muffled sound. He looked, but saw nothing. Odd. Maybe a rat.
As soon as he opened the fridge, he heard the muffle again. As soon as he turned around, all kinds of napkins grabbed several body parts. Then a lot of spoons bounced of his head. Logan, trying to avoid the brutal attack, stepped back. Suddenly, a giant sheet appeared before him and strangled him. And he could have sworn he could here it saying: "Murderer!"
***
Storm entered the kitchen, immediately noticing the big, dirty pile of napkins and spoons.
"Godess, what has happened here?"
She grabbed in the pile, revealing a big, white, dirty sheet.
"Who has done this? Anyway, let's get you hand-washed, little, innocent sheet---"
***
~End of this episode~
Don't forget to review!
A Cris-X Story, in cooperation with Lady_of_the_Dawn.