The Catalyst

Lightning dashed across the sky and the air was supercharged with the flow of adrenaline. Nothing was going according to plan, everything was ruined! By the time Selene had found her bearings, she couldn't reverse what she had done. The only thought that now lingered in her mind was: Who's next?

Graduation from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry had been rather anticlimactic, just as Selene had anticipated. She hadn't expected much from a school that taught nothing but blind morals and defense against something no one fully understood. At last, however, she was free from the repressive walls of the castle to do as she pleased, and the first thing she did was sneak into the Restricted Section of the school's library.

Later that day, the inside pockets of her robes filled with books no Hogwarts students would ever want to glance at, she left the castle for good. Finding her own place had been rather difficult, but she had managed. A shabby flat in one of the worse areas in Manchester gave her all the sustenance she needed to survive; after all she had no fears of sickness or any other natural cause of death, all she needed was a place to call her own that was as far away from her father as possible.

Things had begun to turn in the summer of Selene's fifth year at Hogwarts. She had returned home to find her father as warm and welcoming as ever, but suddenly, she couldn't stand it. It was all a game to him. He could never understand the turmoil that churned ceaselessly through her mind. And in her opinion, all of this business about his 'unconditional love' for her seemed fake. She had endured his prodding as he attempted to find out what bothered her until one day, he suggested something unbearable.

"Selene, sweetheart, I want you to stop sneaking out."

For the first few weeks of her summer vacation, Selene had been home a quarter of the time, and the majority of the time spent out was after dark when she was no longer permitted to leave. So, she had resorted to being snuck out of the modest apartment in London by friends of hers, fellow Death Eaters, and they had whisked her away to each meeting. She would return home in the early hours of the morning to a quiet house and deftly slip up the fire escape to her bedroom. As far as she knew, Remus had not noticed, and she didn't care if he had. However, if he dared question her intentions, she knew that she would not keep quiet.

"I'm not sneaking out!" she had protested heatedly, and Remus had closed his eyes, trying to summon all the courage he had to help his only daughter. Dark wizards he could handle, the disciplining of a fifteen year old was a different matter entirely.

"Please don't lie, you know I don't like it when you lie to me," he had sighed, and Selene had watched him intently, her gaze burning into him. Those eyes. For the life of him, he couldn't meet those eyes, so like her mother's in their hue and the passion that they contained. This was why he lost nearly every argument, because when she stared at him so, he had no choice but to relent. She knew this and she loved every second of it.

And so, it had continued. Selene left nearly every night while Remus waited up in the kitchen, hoping merely to hear the sounds of his offspring climbing in through the window, reassurance that she was safe. However, everything fell apart one sunny day in July.

"I don't know what he was on about; I did it all, every bit. I even told the doorman not to let anyone in."

Remus had gone to Selene's partially cracked door, for he had called her to dinner three times already and each time, she had not answered him. He raised a fist to knock on the door, but then paused, caught by her conversation.

"Well yeah, but it's getting darker. Someone's going to have to 'fess up sooner or later, we don't have much time before the whole thing's ruined. Look at this!"

As a gentle draft blew through the apartment, Selene's door was pushed open just a little more and Remus glanced into her room, and what he saw made his insides freeze. There, in broad daylight, was his little girl, standing before a small handheld mirror propped up against a pillow, holding up the sleeve of her left arm. And upon the soft, once flawless skin of her forearm, was the depiction of a snake protruding from a skull, jet black and obviously paining her. What Remus did next took him by surprise when he looked back on it later, but he had rationalized that it was the only thing left to do. He could do nothing more for the ungrateful child, so he would give the life of the despondent woman a premature start.

In one smooth motion, he had thrown wide the door, stepped inside and managed to seem ten feet taller, towering over Selene as she had never seen him before. Hurriedly, she had pulled the sleeve down, but the damage had already been done and she knew it.

"Get out."

Selene had opened her mouth to retaliate, but stopped. "I--...what?"

"You heard me. I want you out of this apartment." His tone had been firm, despite his quaking resolve. He hadn't wanted it to come down to this, but now that he had proof--convictable proof at that--of what she was doing with her spare time, he had to accept the fact that she was responsible enough to handle the ramifications of her decisions.

She had stared at him indignantly, a fire igniting behind those emerald eyes. For the first time in a long time, he had looked into them, and had not flinched. He had merely squared his shoulders and pointed down the hall toward the living room. She had narrowed her eyes dangerously, sizing him up and trying to discern if he was telling the truth. When their eyes met, she had frozen, seeing the sincerity behind his soft amber eyes. She was no longer welcomed in her own home.

Without another word, she had left and found herself at the mercy of a summer-crazed Tara, who had taken it under her responsibility to show Selene a good time for the remainder of the break. When she went back to school, she spoke nothing of what had happened between herself and her father, for she truly didn't care. She would live with Tara until they graduated, since her best friend had been more than willing to take her in, and only asked three times why Selene chose to wear such horrid long-sleeved shirts all year long.

And so it was that Selene left Hogwarts School without a backward glance, departing for the village of Hogsmeade, from which she disapparated and reappeared in her run-down flat in Manchester. Travis was already there on the couch, unloading boxes with his wand. Travis Leffingwell, Selene's boyfriend of nearly two years, had offered to move in with her and help her to pay rent while she was getting settled into life on her own. Selene had declined at first, feeling it unnecessary to force someone else to live in the squalor she chose to accept as society's gift to her 'ungrateful' self, but Travis had insisted.

"You're going to make yourself sick, staying by yourself all the time," he had said. Of course, Selene knew this to be utterly untrue, but he had given her own of those pouty little expressions he always used when he wanted something. If there was one person that could truly get through to Selene, it was Travis.

The two of them had met, if informally, when Travis arrived at Hogwarts, transferring in from Durmstrang. Selene, hung over from a night of uncharacteristic drinking with Tara, had been sitting outside the Great Hall, combing through the happenings of the previous night, when he had walked by. Caught by surprise by the sudden appearance of a stranger, Selene had been intrigued and Tara, not missing a beat, had set them up on a date. From then on, the two had been inseparable. The compassion that they shared was obvious, and it was the first time any of the Hogwarts students could ever recall seeing emotion besides disdain in Selene's face.

Two years. It would be two years in the fall, and yet something worried Selene. Granted, the only time Selene had been intimate with anyone had been a complete mistake, but even then, she knew that it was not commonplace for a couple who has been together for nearly twenty-four months to have not tried it at least once.

"Let's wait, darling. It'll mean so much more if we do," he always said. Selene was not one to instigate sexual encounters with anyone, but she tried convincing him on several occasions, and the more she pushed him, the more he seemed to doubt her love for him. And so, around their year and a half mark, Selene had stopped trying altogether and settled for being emotionally bound to Travis. Although, she hadn't stopped thinking about it every now and then.

"You know, once upon a time, there was a magical little thing called manual labor," Selene joked as she set the books down on a pile of boxes near the door. "And what is all this, anyway? I barely had two boxes..." She looked around at the shabby living room which was littered with half-empty boxes, some levitating, and some resting haphazardly around the couch.

"Labor's for muggles," Travis scoffed, and Selene smiled. It always pleased her to hear him talk of muggles like this. She had quickly picked up the unquestioned loathing of non-magic people from the Death Eaters and had begun to disburse it throughout her daily life, taking particular joy in converting others to think as she did.

"That still doesn't explain the fact that you packed your life into these meaningless possessions of yours," she said, smirking and stepping around an overturned box and sitting on the couch beside Travis.

"They're not meaningless, they just happen to have little to no monetary value, that's all," he said as he grinned at her innocently. She rolled her eyes.

"That would be the textbook definition of 'meaningless' my dear..." she stood up, stretching, and as she did so, he watched her shirt slip up a little, revealing a pale abdomen and the faint outline of her hip bones. She had definitely grown into herself since the first time he'd met her.

Tall and lanky, she'd been--to say the least--a little self-conscious of her body, but he didn't care. To him, she was beautiful in a way that he couldn't describe. In fact, words just didn't seem to be able to say how she intrigued him, seduced him, and scared the shit out of him all at the same time. Maybe it was the eyes. Those fierce eyes that were filled with so much life, such a passion to take what was rightfully hers in the world. In most situations, he avoided them, because they had a habit of forcing the truth out of anyone brave enough to meet them.

"Just because you can't sell something for a good price doesn't mean it's meaningless," Travis replied, and she looked down at him, tugging the hem of her shirt down past her waistline again, a smirk on her thin lips.

"Then what gives something meaning, if not its worth?" she asked, challenging him. He was quite used to this. The majority of their conversation was subtle argumentation, most often on morals. She was vehement in her views and there was little he could do to suggest an alternative to the way she believed in something, but he tried nonetheless. As long as he questioned her, she was humbled to give him an answer, and therefore did not get carried away in her ideals.

"Worth isn't everything, especially worth that concerns money..." he said, and she raised an eyebrow and folded her arms, watching him relentlessly. He looked away, standing up as well. "You're not meaningless to me," he said softly, looking down into her eyes. He stood a few inches taller than her and when she was looking up at him, he felt less compelled to quake before her gaze.

"Don't get me started on human worth," she replied, her smirk growing to a grin. "That's something completely different."

"Oh? And tell me, just how does one measure human worth?" he asked. It was when she began talking like this that he started to get worried. Some of her views were downright frightening, particularly those on seeking revenge.

"Well, you see, it's a mixture of self-worth and consequentiality. If there's a balance between how important you think you are, and how important you really are, then there's a good chance you mean something to somebody. But if the scales are tipped, well, then you're pretty much a waste of air."

Travis paused. "But then, how do you know how important you really are? And who measures that?"

"Nature, society, the social ladder. If you've developed a niche in which you fit without complaints, and you do your job without bothering anyone else, then you're worth something to the world."

"And self-worth?"

"That has to do with what you do for yourself, how you appease your needs."

"But what if your needs contradict your 'niche' and you wind up bothering other people?"

"Then the balance is thrown off and you're a waste of time."

Travis laughed softly, wrapping his arms around her. She seemed to be lost in thought about her theory, for she stood in silence, wrapping her arms around him in return and resting her head against his chest. There was certainly no beating around the bush when it came to her, he thought. She went straight to the point and didn't bother justifying herself because, in her mind, there was no need to. She was right, where she was concerned, and there was no other way about it.

After a while, Travis slid his hand into his pocket, checking for something he knew was there. He'd already made sure it was five times today. Taking a deep breath, he slowly pulled away from Selene and she looked up at him inquisitively. He looked down, pretending to be coy.

"There's one box I've forgotten to unpack...I can only hope you don't count it as one of those meaningless possessions..." Selene paused, her brow furrowing with impatient curiosity. She looked down at his hand, which he had slipped in and out of his pocket, withdrawing a small, velvet-covered box. She hesitated, her heart skipping a beat. Was that--no, it couldn't be...

But before her eyes, Travis knelt to one knee and opened the box, offering it up to her. Inside was the most beautiful thing Selene had ever seen, and she wasn't one for jewelry. It was a slender gold ring, adorned with an emerald cut diamond surrounded by tiny emeralds that glittered in the afternoon sun filtering through the old blinds. It was as modest as an engagement ring could get apart from something out of a k'nut machine, but it took Selene's breath away regardless.

"Selene, I knew the moment I first saw you; you were the only one my arms would ever hold. Will you marry me?"

"And then, out of nowhere, he asked me to marry him!"

"That's great, Selene."

It was a day later, and Selene and her best friend, Tara Tucker, were sitting outside Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlor in Hogsmeade village beneath an umbrella that kept out the bright June sun. Since it was the summer, the entire place was teeming with tourists, wizards and witches, young and old alike, spending their extra galleons on a trip to one of the most historical magical establishments. It was a waste of money, according to Selene, but she wasn't thinking about them now. Her mind was swimming with the events of the day before.

"What's the matter, aren't you happy for me?" Selene asked, for once betraying her habits and allowing herself to be ecstatic in public. No one would notice anyway.

"Of course I'm happy for you," Tara replied, poking at her ice cream with a spoon. She looked preoccupied, but Selene was too elated to push the matter further.

"I was thinking about whether or not I should tell my father..." she said, taking a bite of ice cream and looking past Tara toward a couple sitting behind her, talking about something in low tones.

"Why wouldn't you?" Tara asked, her eyes still on her ice cream.

Selene's gaze snapped abruptly to her friend, and she stared disbelievingly. "Because it's not like he cares enough to be concerned about who I decide to marry."

At this, Tara looked up at her. "Then why are you even considering telling him?"

Selene paused and looked back at the couple, who were now not only discreetly fighting, but giving each other looks that could kill. "It would be the right thing to do."

Tara raised an eyebrow. "Well, if that's the case, I'm surprised you're even thinking about considering it."

"Just what do you mean by that?" Selene asked sharply, looking back at Tara with fire in her eyes. This conversation was getting tiresome to Selene, like trying to converse with a wall. She was getting nothing but silence from her friend as far as helpful advice went.

The two of them watched each other for a moment before Tara spoke. "Nothing, Selene. I didn't mean anything by it." At that, she stood up, tossed a few sickles onto the table and disapparated, leaving Selene with the haunting suspicion that Tara's words had been everything but sincere.

"What the hell were you thinking! We had an agreement!"

"Tara..."

"No. Listen--"

It was nearing two o'clock in the morning when Tara had come bursting in on Travis and Selene as they slept. She had grabbed Travis' arm and disapparated with him, throwing him to the floor in the living room of her apartment. Now, he stood, attempting to waylay the furious girl before her.

"No, you listen. It's over," he said firmly, more to himself than to her. He had had enough with their sneaking around. He didn't want to betray Selene anymore, and he had to tell her the truth about what had been going on--after the wedding.

"Who are you to say it's over!" she shot back wildly, glaring daggers at the man before him. When Selene had begun to date him all those years ago, Tara had been perfectly fine with it. But then, as the months wore on and Tara found no consoling sense of worth in her relationships with men--albeit most lasted merely one night--she began to crave something more. She wanted what Selene had: someone to go to every night and to hold and be held by. She wanted Travis.

"Who are you to say it's not?"

When Tara had come to him at the end of their sixth year, he had received her with blind faith that she would want nothing more than companionship. He had welcomed her with open arms as she had ran to him, sobbing and pouring her heart out about her failed love affairs, as any good friend would do.

"We got into this together, and we're getting out of it--together."

It was her carefully construed plan to approach first with an innocent need for pity. Then, as he became more comfortable with her company, she would start to make her move.

"What are you saying?"

He had resisted at first, not wanting to risk his relationship with Selene, who he had come to love over the past year. But the more she pressed, the more he reasoned that it was the wrong thing to do not to give in. Tara needed him more than Selene did at the moment, and if he could keep it from his girlfriend, he could help Tara how she needed to be helped.

"You're going to break it off with her."

It started with a kiss. In the Astronomy Tower late at night at the beginning of their seventh year, the two of them had sat together in silence, both daring the other to be the first to speak. Travis was the first to break, which was unusual, and he decided that after such a long time of listening to her, it would be the least she could do to listen to him. So, he regaled her with the story of a fight he and Selene had recently had.

"You're crazy!"

Tara hadn't been the least bit interested in what he had to say, so she humored him for a while before taking the news as all the leverage she needed. If there was trouble in paradise, there was nothing stopping her from getting what she truly wanted. She had kissed him while he was in the middle of a sentence, and at first, it seemed he would draw away, but he relaxed almost immediately, falling into a deep embrace with his girlfriend's best friend.

"Do it or I will."

At first, the guilt had been too much for Travis. He could no longer look Selene in the eyes, and he became distant. Tara warned him not to let it slip, that they must continue in silence because that was what both of them needed. He couldn't understand why he needed her so much, but then, he couldn't understand much at all anymore. His world had been turned upside down.

"Tara--"

And then, one foggy night in November, it happened. It seemed almost hypocritical; he had pushed Selene away so many times when she had asked him to make love to her. Yet, when Tara proposed the idea, he had acquiesced before he could think twice about his decision.

Three months later, at a quarter of ten in the morning, Selene found herself on the verge of vomiting, but she held it in for fear of ruining the nicest dress she had ever worn in her life. It was probably the first time she had ever held any consideration for the state of clothing, but she had bigger things on her mind than the solidarity of her habitual state of audaciousness. Today was the day she and Travis had set to be their wedding day, and so far, everything was going off without a hitch. Well, that's what Selene would like to have thought.

The day got off to a rocky start when Selene awoke to find no one in the bed next to her. A brief moment of panic made her heart skip a beat as she considered the possibility that the Death Eaters had found out about her relationship with Travis, and had taken it upon themselves to kidnap him for some ungodly reason. This wild speculation was put to ease when Travis walked in the door at half past six, looking just as surprised to find Selene up as she was to find him gone.

They had skirted around the issue, however, and hurried off to get ready for the wedding. It wasn't to be a particularly large ceremony. In fact, the guest list consisted of a handful of people the two of them had known at Hogwarts, among them Will Parry, and when Selene arrived at the chapel, only half of them had shown up. She wasn't altogether worried, considering she hadn't wanted anyone to come in the first place, but Travis had insisted. Giving the lobby a quick once-over for Tara, Selene had ducked away to get changed.

Meanwhile, Travis had apparated in a pub down the street from the chapel, his insides writhing with the deadly combination of guilt and nerves. He was torn between two possible endings to the day, and neither of them seemed very appealing. If Tara had the gall to show up, Travis would have to stop her before Selene saw her. If she didn't turn up at all, Selene would be heartbroken. Either way, he knew he would have to deal with a downtrodden wife in the end.

By the time ten o'clock arrived, several more things had gone wrong. Tara was nowhere in sight, one of the guests had gotten violently ill and spent nearly half an hour in the bathroom, and the vicar had set fire to the hem of Selene's dress when he accidentally caught a lit candle with the sleeve of his long robes.

At quarter of ten, Selene had had enough with the misgivings and was ready to throw it all away and make a run for it. She could leave this all behind, catch a train to Spain, and never look back. But something at the back of her mind told her to stay, that things would work out precisely as they were meant to.

And so, when Travis showed up and without more hesitation, the ceremony commenced, Selene began to relax. The only problem now was that Tara had still not arrived, but that could be worked around and Selene would just have to remember to be mad at her later, because at the moment, she was just anxious to get the whole thing over and done with.

The wedding march echoed throughout the hall and Selene was suddenly drowning in a sea of sounds. She could hear the music, the awed muttering of half a dozen people as she stepped into the aisle, and the racing thud of her own heartbeat as she looked up and her eyes met Travis'. He looked amazed at the very sight of her, and who wouldn't, thought Selene. This was the only time in her entire life that she had taken care to improve her appearance, having loosely curled her hair and dabbled in magical cosmetics, and though it was nothing over the top, it was an improvement all the same.

The sounds died down and a rumble of thunder ensued, causing Selene to pause slightly in her tracks. Rain on a wedding day, they had covered that in Divinations class. Apparently, it was an omen of some sort, but Selene brushed it aside. She could not brush aside, however, the pulsing energy that ran through the chapel as rain began to patter against the stained glass windows above them. All of a sudden, the room seemed to shrink to three times its original size, pressing in, making Selene feel claustrophobic, as if there was no escaping what was to come.

Before long, Selene came to the altar and stepped up, giving Travis a small grin before turning to the vicar. Saying their vows and exchanging rings took little time, the fact of which was helped along by the pouring rain that berated the small building, and urged them to hurry in order that they might get to the reception hall before the roof of the chapel decided to disappear.

"If any person can show just cause why they may not be joined together � let them speak now or forever hold their peace," the vicar was concluding, and he continued on without giving much pause until a voice rang out from the crowd.

"Yeah, I've got just cause."

Selene paused and Travis went pale; the both of them turned toward the source of the voice and their eyes landed on who they had thought was the guest who had gotten ill and had slipped back into to the room after the ceremony started. But there, standing in the middle of the pews, was their best friend, Tara Tucker.

"Tara, where have you--"

"Save it. This has nothing to do with you," and with that, her vibrant gaze fell upon Travis, who looked as if he'd rather be any other place in the world. Selene looked to him as well, confusion plaguing her expression. He avoided her eyes and looked instead toward his lover.

"Tara...please don't do this. Not now, not today," he begged, though he knew the damage was done.

"I gave you fair warning. If you had only done as I'd asked--"

"Tara, Travis, what's going on?" Selene asked, looking between the two of them, but her innocent confusion was quickly turning to something like agitation, and the subtle suspicion that she had been played.

Tara looked at her, but Travis spoke up before she had the chance to. "Selene, it's not what you think--"

"It's precisely what you think," Tara interrupted him, stepping out into the aisle. Travis looked at her desperately, inwardly begging her not to go on, but she persisted and he fell silent, looking down. "He's been cheating on you, Selene. He doesn't love you--"

"That's a lie!" Travis protested, but Tara scoffed at him.

"If that's how you treat those you love--"

"If this is how you treat your friends--"

"Stop it, both of you!" By this time, everyone was staring at Selene, who was looking between her best friends, surprise now absent from her face. Instead, it had been replaced by a burning desire to know what she had done to deserve this, if anything at all. She shook her head, her eyes falling upon Tara. "Why?"

Tara looked up at her, and a smirk flitted across her lips. "Okay, if that's what you want, I'll take the blame. You know I have plenty of reason to do what I did."

Selene paused, confused. "What? What reason could you possibly have?"

"Are you serious?" Tara asked, laughing darkly. "Do you really not remember?"

Searching deep within the recesses of her memory, Selene could find nothing that would instigate this cruel of a betrayal and she shook her head, watching the vehement young woman in front of her.

"A Gobstone player, Selene...think hard. You remember..."

Selene paused. Something was coming back to her, something big that had happened after a night at a pub in Hogsmeade. But what was it that was so bad?

"You knew I liked him--more than like, you knew he was different than all those other boys to me. And yet--"

She had slept with him. Selene had lost her virginity in a drunken blur in the back of a pub with a Gobstone player. The Gobstone player that Tara had liked--no, not liked, loved. But Tara had never acted like it bothered her before, so why was it so important now, two and a half years later?

"Tara, you knew that was an accident! You knew I didn't mean to--you knew I loved Travis!" Selene exclaimed as all of a sudden, her true emotions broke forth. She was seething with anger. The one person Selene had ever called her own--the one person she could ever trust--the one person she had truly loved had betrayed her, and her best friend had let it happen. In fact, knowing Tara, her best friend had made it happen.

"I loved N--"

"NO!" Selene yelled, and her eyes burned with the madness of a person who has been deceived by everyone she's ever known. "You know nothing of love! You have no idea what it's like to care for someone as if they were a part of you! You couldn't possibly fathom what it feels like to trust someone with your very life, and to have them rip your heart out! And to have this happen with every person you ever meet, it's enough to drive a person insane!"

"I suppose we don't have to worry--you were already insane."

Selene said nothing, glaring at Tara, and the silence was broken only by a clash of thunder as lightning raced across the sky. The tension was so thick, that even the vicar squirmed uncomfortably, but no one else dared move, for fear of Selene's rage being turned on them. Travis merely watched, petrified.

Finally, Selene spoke, and when she did, it was in a tone dripping with malice and laced with murder.

"That's it! I'm through with playing by the rules of your game! Tara Tucker, you will be the first to pay for what you've done--and rest assured I will leave no one unpunished!" In one swift movement, she pulled out her wand and pointed it at the girl she once counted as her best friend in the world.

"Avada Kedavra!"

Lightning dashed across the sky and the air was supercharged with the flow of adrenaline. Selene was sitting in the basement of her apartment building, her mind reeling. She had to get away, and fast. No doubt the Aurors were well on their way to the chapel to investigate the source of the Killing Curse. There was no turning back now, and Selene knew in her heart that she would never be finished until the last of her mother's family were dead.