Title: Ninirnia
Author: Athena2693
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Playing around with Zim's telescope, Dib discovers a strange, primitive planet. Hints of ZADR.
Warnings: Lots of OOC. I can't write the Zimcabulary!
A/N: This idea just came from thinking about how the Irkens must've been able to live naturally at one time, and wondering if there was any backlash to the introduction of the pak.
Dib, a particularly pale and rather short fourteen year old, had himself planted in front of a rather huge telescope, proving his overall geekiness as he squealed out some nonsense about meat-eating plants on Kiglar. The owner of the telescope, a rather punitive green-skinned being named Zim, who was currently tinkering with some new doomsday device or something, ignored the human's pig-like noise. The Dib-human was always like that. Of course, we're talking about a species here who got excited about long-dead microscopic cells found on Mars. So what else should he expect?
Though it was sort of odd he didn't even question how Dib knew the name of the planet he was currently inspecting, since all the computer information in the lab was displayed in Irken, the writing style of Zim's home planet.
The two beings had a rather strange relationship. More than friends, but still enemies. It really made no sense whatsoever, which, somehow, worked perfectly for the two. An average day for the two could start out by meeting at Dib's house in the morning, walking to school together, Zim pulling out some new sort of weapon, Dib attempting to bring Zim to some physical harm, crisis adverted, school, lunch, school, walking to Zim's house, crazy alien sex, homework, and usually finishing up with Zim working on his next weapon while Dib played around in the lab awhile before heading home for the night. Though sometimes, usually on the weekends, he might spend the night, if Zim offered. And of course, the routine could easily have sex in the morning and fighting in the afternoon, or fighting during the first half of the lunch period, and sex during the second half in a stall in the boy's bathroom. Though admittedly, the latter had only occurred on one occasion, to date. In the same day, anyway.
Dib's favorite part of Zim's lab (besides the bed on the lowest level that is, because Zim had insisted the elevator ride from the lowest lab to the second story of the house, where Zim's bedroom is, was too long to wait) was the telescope. The telescope was beyond human comprehension. You could see the pores on an individual's face three galaxies over with this baby. And since it was computerized, all you had to do was ask the computer to focus on a certain planet or celestial body. Or, as Dib preferred, you could just press the button on the ever-expanding list for the coordinates to set. He couldn't read the names of most of the planets (he had, secretly, been teaching himself a little of the Irken alphabet, having discovered that Zim always completed school assignments in Irken, then translated them into English afterwards, and could already read a few shorter names), but he liked to just watch and see what was going on.
There were so many planets. So many species. So many intelligent species! Some of the species were so foreign, so oddly built. Their structures were beyond anything humans could ever imagine. And not in the childish drawing sort of way with eyes on their feet and six mouths. Because, frankly, many of them didn't have eyes or mouths!
The Irkens were one of the most human-like in appearance, Dib had so far concluded. Probably because they were so intelligent. After all, the most intelligent species had no need for claws and absurd features, when they had tools for such use.
"Dib, does your species find ingesting fish skin poisonous?" Zim's voice, though asking a rather malicious question (Zim had only recently realized humans removed the scales and was trying to work this into a new evil scheme) was comfortable and warm in the rather pleasant, laid back atmosphere.
"No. We just don't like the feel of them."
"Oh. Never mind then." Zim sighed, somewhat annoyed, and threw his new machine into the trash tube.
In the meantime, Dib had pressed another random planet selection, this time being one he recognized only a single symbol in. He had no idea what this planet was called.
He ignored the banging and clanging around behind him as Zim cleaned up his workspace, and then went to use some soap to wash machine oil from his gloved hands.
At first the planet looked somewhat deserted, though thickly covered with what appeared to be grasslands and sparse amounts of trees. Of course, the vegetation was very foreign from that on earth, and the trees were bigger than any Dib had ever seen on television or in real life.
But it seemed strange for such a green, natural planet to be devoid of life.
Then something flashed across the screen, a smear of green, and a moment later, another smear passed by. He zoomed out, trying to figure out what had passed by.
Little green creatures, almost blending into the landscape, if they weren't darting around so. Their eyes were a deep red and matching black antennae were pressed down closely to their scalps to cut down on wind resistance. It took a moment for Dib to realize what these two little creatures were, because Zim had no wings.
"Oh wow, they're smeets!" Dib cried out unexpectedly
"You found the nursery planet," Zim asked, walking up behind him, a towel in his hands.
"Well, you said all Irkens came from it, but you always explained it as cold and mechanical," Dib frowned, sort of confused with the idea. "And you never mentioned you were born with wings."
"Wings," Zim questioned out loud, confused for a moment, before a look of realization crossed his face. "That's because I wasn't. Computer, display telescope image on screen."
Dib turned away from the telescope to look at the computer screen as Zim was. It was easier to see this way anyway, without having to press his glasses against the lens.
"They're smeets, right? Or are they too old?"
"They're older smeets, you're right there," Zim nodded. "But we have none of this weird 'children' and 'teenager' categories like your race. If you're not an adult, you're a smeet."
"So they are Irken then? Why do they have wings?"
"They're not wings," Zim replied somewhat know-it-allingly. An adult Irken, wingless, approached one of the smeets on the screen and lifted it into their arms. "They're sun panels. Smeets hatch with them. They're used to absorb sunlight as a form of nutrients. They shrivel up and eventually fall off before adulthood is reached. Because of their small forms, smeets don't have enough skin to absorb sunlight at high enough levels, so the sun panels create surface area."
"Wait, you're confusing me," Dib replied after Zim had stopped talking. He had hoped his lover would elaborate further, but it seemed he didn't plan on it. What should he ask first? About the hatching? Dib already knew Irkens weren't hatched from anything, they were grown in tubes. And since when was Zim able to basically photosynthesize? "I just…do you eat?"
Zim laughed a little, shaking his head. Okay, maybe he was a little cruel, but he liked confusing his mate. It amused him to see that look on his face.
"Dib, look at them. You know what they have different from me, but what don't they have?"
He looked back at the screen, studying the forms for a moment. Green skin, antennae, eyes, no ears, no nose, no pak.
"They don't have any paks! I thought you couldn't live without one!"
"I can't, they can. Congratulations Dib, you found Ninirnia, an Irken planet that, officially, doesn't exist. They're a group of Irkens unconnected to the system. Technically, they're a resistance group."
"Like the Resisty?"
"No," Zim shook his head. "If they were like the Resisty, the Tallest wouldn't let them live. They're just a group of Irkens that separated from the rest of the race back before we really got into space exploration, so, obviously, they're pretty old. Around the time the paks came into common use, right before they became mandatory, they split off into a community on Irk, and later on, founded their own planet. They have some obsolete ideas about 'natural life', and refuse any form of technology."
"So what, they're Amish?"
"No, they're more like those smelly people who wear all the tie-dye, what are they called again? There were some groups like your Amish that existed for a while, but they eventually disappeared. These are different. They're all about liberty and love and stuff. Our species don't like to let others know they exist, since their existence could be a sign of weakness, but the Tallest let them live, as long as they stay there and don't interfere with our plans. I think they're too primitive to be able to anyway."
Dib turned back to the telescope, zooming out further to get a wider view of the landscape. He saw some bumps on the far left and set the telescope's coordinates to the area, zooming in closer again. The bumps appeared to be, oddly enough, humungous nests. They didn't even have some crude form of covering. They were just there out in the open, a couple of them holding light pink eggs, most of them containing dozing Irks, asleep in the sunshine. It was an odd sight, but this planet must have no rain, since Irkens couldn't survive on such a planet in the first place. It sort of made sense, but yes, it was very primitive. Dib could never imagine Zim living on the plains like some sort of reptile-like ostrich.
"So Irkens can photosynthesize?"
"Primitive Irkens do. They have to. My pak is what allows me to eat, Dib. I can't digest foods without it. It's what changes your smelly Earth air into breathable air for myself. It's what allows me to live a long, productive life. Primitive Irkens can't intake foods. They must spend hours and hours in the sun each day to produce energy. They can ingest liquids, but that's it. If Irken invaders and soldiers had to spend that much time lying around in the sun, we'd never be able to complete our jobs. We can still get energy from the sun, but it's a small supplement, we don't need it. And we live much, much longer. The inhabitants of Ninirnia won't live much longer than an average human. Quite pathetic, really. I don't understand why they'd wish to be slaves to the land."
"Still, the wings are quite cute," Dib smiled at the image of the same smeet he had witnessed earlier being swept into the arms of either its mother or father. He recognize the figure by its clothing. The two approached one of the nests, and appeared to be settling down for an afternoon nap as well.
The wings of the smeet, large and opaque, were quite similar to those of a dragonfly, except there were only two of them, rather than four, and they were a bit wider in body proportion. The opaque webbing glowed a pretty green-blue color.
"Irken invaders have no need for wings. None of us ever have. Our paks are plugged into the nerves where the wings would've come from. A much worthier deed, for sure. Come on, Dib-human. Let's go to bed."
"Still… Your pak makes it so awkward, at times. I think I'd prefer to see you spread out on the bed with a pair of shimmering wings behind you."
"You realize, that makes you a smeetophile?"