"But she doesn't like me!" Penelope wailed into the phone, wishing Derek was there to comfort her. "And now I have to spend an entire weekend with her! Why did Cruz think this was a good idea, again?"
"Because we have to learn how to get along with each other, Baby Girl. That's why he shipped me off with Hotch and Reid off with Rossi."
She sighed in frustration, thumping back down on the bed and staring up at the rough wood ceiling. "I hate when you're right," she hissed before hanging up on him, knowing that he would understand. Setting the phone down forcefully on the nightstand, she closed her eyes and tried to count to twenty.
The cabin door opening and closing told her that that would be impossible. "Your voice carries," Alex said lowly, sounding hurt. Penelope refused to open her eyes, though, she didn't want to see if the woman really was crying, like it sounded. The bed dipped and she scooted away, hugging the edge. "And you've claimed the only bed. I suppose you want me to sleep on the floor."
Penelope shrugged a little, her lips drawing up into a tight frown. "If that's what you think is best." She tried to sound indifferent, but as the silence grew around them, she heard the first softly indrawn breath, the way that said breath caught in Blake's throat, and she knew that she had hurt the woman more than she had known.
"I didn't ask for this, you know. Cruz is better at dealing with tensions in the team than Erin was. She preferred to let us work out our problems on our own, and obviously, he won't stand for that. I'll, I'll just sleep in the car for the weekend."
"No! It's supposed to get really cold at night." She turned and saw that Alex wasn't looking at her, that her shoulders were slumped and shaking. A small corner of her heart, the one that was so loyal to Erin, turned in that moment, finally cracking at the piteous sight before her. "Oh, Alex."
The woman scrunched up even more, and she suddenly saw that her coolness, her aloofness, was merely a façade for the lonely woman who just wanted to be included once more. Sighing deeply, she rolled over until she could curl her body around Alex. The woman stiffened and tried to pull away, but Penelope slithered up around her body, cuddling her close. It took a few long minutes, but she finally relaxed against her, turning her face so that her cheek rested against the top of Penelope's head. "Why do you hate me?"
"You're not Erin." Her answer was quick and honest, something she knew that Alex preferred. "You've been trying to be her, what with the hairstyle and your actions, but you're a pale substitute. She's happy with Rossi, home, away from the evil we see all day. Why do you try to be her clone?"
"I loved her, once." The words were quiet and they shocked Penelope to the core. "That's why it hurt so much when she gave me up to the wolves. I know, now, why she had to do that. At the time, I was blinded by a crush the size of Texas."
She nodded as she began to rub her hand in slow, gentle circles on Alex's stomach. She was so much softer than her image, and Penelope relished that softness, that vulnerability. "She's really easy to crush on. I mean, with eyes like those, how could you not drown in them?"
Alex gasped and pushed Penelope away. "You can't be serious. You, too?"
Penelope shrugged. "I'm not good at jealous. So I took it out on you instead. And then, I thought that you hated me. You certainly have acted like it."
It was Alex's turn to shrug and Penelope gave her a soft smile. "I may not have been the kindest person I could have been in all these months. You just remind me of her, in the quiet moments, when it was just us." Another tender admission, and Penelope felt the last part of the wall between them fall away. Opening her arms, she let Alex tumble her back onto the bed, let her wrap her long arms around her waist as her lips sought out Penelope's in a blind, hungry, kiss.
It was awkward, there was no way around that, Penelope knew. Her mouth was large and lush, and it felt like she was going to devour Penelope, if she would let her. And yet, inside that awkward kiss, there was a yearning that touched Penelope's heart and caused her to kiss Alex back with the same fervor, letting her hands slide down her back until they reached her ass. The skin tight jeans allowed the warmth from her body to bleed through into Penelope's hands and she unconsciously tightened them around her flesh.
This just seemed to encourage Alex, and Penelope gasped a little when she felt one of those gorgeous hands cup her breast, the long fingers pinching and rolling her nipple to an internal rhythm. The kissing came to an end and Penelope heard her breathing match Alex's – harsh and broken. "Please," she whimpered, looking into those soft brown eyes. She really didn't know what she was asking for, except that she knew she wanted to feel Alex's lips on her once more.
"Why?"
"We've come this far, don't force me to retreat now, not when we've made progress. Real progress. I don't have the words, like you do. All I know is that kissing you felt right. So, please."
Alex let out a deep breath as she nodded, turning them on their sides so that she could stroke Penelope's hair lightly as she looked into her eyes. Penelope laughed nervously under the scrutiny, and Alex frowned a little. "Am I that ridiculous?"
"No, Alexandra. You see too much of me. It's like you can read my soul." She averted her eyes, certain she was now going to be rejected. She had screwed everything up and made it worse when Cruz wanted everything better. Closing her eyes, the first tear slipped out of her eye and down her nose. Alex stopped its path with her lips and she sighed delicately.
"Don't cry because of me." Another soft kiss was pressed to her lips. "Please."
"Yes. Anything." She let Alex kiss her one more time before tugging at the hem of her sweater. She made a mental note to thank Cruz for the forced retreat as soon as they were home.
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