Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia.
"Dad?" Peters's blue eyes met his father's equally blue orbs. "You and dad promised to tell me about how I was born!" The child squirmed eagerly under the covers.
Alfred laughed obnoxiously, sitting next to the green eyed Brit on the bed. "Well, son, that's a LONG story..."
A certain sexy, sexy Brit stepped out into the bright sunlight after several hours of hot sex with Francis.
He walked up the street, his super short booty shorts hugging his fine ass deliciously, causing all the boys to stop and stare at his sexy fine ass. And suddenly, they were all hit with the realization that they didn't want to go to a stripper club and fuck some random whore; ho no, they wanted to pound into Arthur Kirkland's sexy fine ass. But, of course, they didn't, because they knew he was Alfred's bitch and no one wanted to mess with the hero.
Now you'd think Arthur would be a little ashamed, considering he was topped by Francis, but no, he was quite happy; well, he was drunk, but to him it was all the same.
Anyhow, this Brit was super fucking horny and he needed sex. Like, now. So he decided to go see Alfred; he was sure he could get some sex out of the American.
Well, Alfred was pretty willing, so they took it to the bedroom. And when the panties were gone and the sexy, sexy Brit got a good look at Alfred's manhood, he frowned. "Is that bloody it?"
The American stared at Arthur, rather confused. "I mean, I expected you to be huge, but this...This is disappointing." The sexy, sexy Brit's frown deepened. "I'm not sure I want to fuck you anymore."
Well, Alfred was pretty horny at this point, and he wasn't willing to let free sex slip away so easily. So, using his awesome hero powers, he got bigger than Prussia! How, you might ask? Because he's the hero and this is anime, and thus, these things should be expected.
Well, Arthur was sure as fucking hell impressed at this, so they fucked.
Then Francis was sad for a while, because he lost his uke to Alfred, but he got to have butt sex with Matthew, so the world became right once more.
Or so they thought.
A FEW DAYS LATER...
A sickening noise echoed from the bathroom, much like a cat coughing up a hair ball. "Hey bro, you alright?" The American questioned, knocking on the door.
"You idiot, I'm pregnant, of course not!" Arthur screamed angrily. "You forgot to use a bloody condom, you wanker! You-!"
The Brit would have screamed more, but he was overtaken by a wave of nausia and had to visit the toilet once again.
"So that's how you came to be and how Francis became your uncle!"
The child stared at his grinning father, clearly confused. "But you're both guys." He eyed Arthur, as though doubting his gender. "How did you have a kid?"
The American laughed obnoxiously. "Well son, the thing about male pregnancy is-!"
The Brit abrutly covered the American's mouth. "That's a story for another time."
And thus, Sealand had nightmares about butt sex and male pregnancy for the rest of the week.
I apologize in advance to all I scarred.
Review, please!