Lindsay opened the door to her apartment. The sun was setting over the city. This day had been every level of stressful for her and all she wanted to do was go to bed. She closed her door and flipped on the lights. Lindsay strolled into the living room and removed her jacket. She set it over the back of her couch and kicked off her shoes. Lindsay sighed and set down her purse and keys on the table next to the couch.
Lindsay sat on the comforting cushions of her couch. Her hands gripped her kneecaps tightly. She felt her bottled emotions reaching their breaking point. Lindsay grabbed the closest pillow from the couch and held it against her chest. Lindsay drew her legs up against the pillow and buried her face into the fabric. She cried out, allowing the warm tears to fall down her face.
The case had been hard. It hit her really hard. Nichole was someone Lindsay would've gladly spent more time with. She could see them chatting in their apartments with Nichole's baby, and Lindsay asking questions. Lindsay knew that she could've done something more to help Nichole, maybe she would've even been alive.
To make her day even more emotionally exhausting, Lindsay had been forced to tell Danny she was pregnant. She never expected him at the clinic, catching her in a lie. Lindsay had expected him to confront her about it, but not as soon as she'd returned to the office. She could still see Danny's reaction when she told him. It had taken all her strength to keep herself from crying. At the stationhouse, Danny had been pulled out before they'd been given a chance to talk.
Lindsay recalled her mother's words. 'You can't keep something like this a secret from anybody.' Lindsay had known that, but she had been trying to find the right moment to tell him. Telling Danny in the middle of a similar case was not what she'd had in mind.
The pocket of her pants started vibrating and ringing, causing Lindsay to jump form the sudden exclamation into the silent apartment. Lindsay dropped her legs back onto her floor and pulled her phone from her pocket. She found herself looking at a goofy smiling Danny on her ID. Lindsay hesitated over the button for several extra seconds. Her finger trembled as she accepted the call.
"Hey." she said.
"Hey." Came the reply. "I wasn't sure you'd pick."
"Neither was I." Lindsay replied.
"I can understand that." Danny said.
Lindsay could hear the hurt in his voice. She knew this wasn't just affecting her now. She'd hurt Danny storming out of the locker room during the day. She wasn't expecting him to be so forgiving.
"Are you free?"
"When?" Lindsay asked.
"Now. Can we talk?" Danny asked.
Lindsay bit her lip. The conversation needed to take place, but it wouldn't be easy. She knew she would end up crying halfway through it and tell him to leave. She knew she would go to bed and cry herself to sleep. She knew she would end up losing the one man she really loved. But it needed to happen. Lindsay inhaled deeply and freed her lip. "How long will it take you?"
"Depends."
"On?"
"How long it takes you to open your door." Danny said.
Lindsay's brows furrowed. She stood from the couch. Keeping the phone to her ear, she walked across her apartment to the front door. Lindsay briefly rose to her tiptoes and peeked through the hole. She could see Danny standing at her door, holding the phone to his ear. Lindsay flattened her feet and opened the door.
Danny lowered his phone and closed it in front of her. Lindsay could see how tough it had been on Danny as well. It had been a while since she'd seen him look so hurt…and scared. Lindsay closed her phone and slipped it back into her pocket. She leaned against her door, keeping her eyes lower than his.
"Hey." he said.
"Hey." Lindsay replied.
"How ya feelin'?" Danny asked.
Lindsay could help but love Danny more. Even if he was only asking her because she was pregnant, it still meant he cared for her. "Alright…I guess."
Danny held up a small brown paper bag. Lindsay looked at him curiously. "I uh…thought you'd want something sweet."
Lindsay took the bag from him slowly. She pulled open the bag and looked inside. A small smile slipped across her face. Inside was a small pint of rocky road ice cream. "Thank you."
"I thought after a day like this…you might want your favorite." Danny explained.
Lindsay smiled more. She pushed the door all the way open. "Come on in."
Lindsay watched how hesitant Danny was entering her apartment. He looked hesitant, wondering whether he should be there with her. Danny entered slowly, staying near the door. Lindsay closed the door once Danny was inside and walked to the kitchen. She set the ice cream in the freezer and shut the door. Lindsay turned back around, facing Danny. He still stood near the door as if he was ready to leave any second. Lindsay walked to the counter and leaned her back against it.
Danny stared down at the floor. Wondering how he should start the conversation. He inhaled deeply. "Lindsay, were you planning on tellin' me at all?"
Lindsay's eyes grew wide with surprise. She calmed for a few seconds before she nodded. "Yes, Danny. I was going to tell you."
"Why didn' you tell me sooner?" Danny asked, shrugging his shoulders.
Lindsay looked as if she would smile, but her head lowered down to the floor. "Would you have reacted any other way, Danny?"
Danny lowered his head again, "No, probly not."
Lindsay lifted her head.
"But you didn't have to lie to me." Danny replied, bringing up his head. Lindsay could see the hurt behind his eyes.
"Danny, you would've kept asking more questions if I'd told it was a doctor's appointment." Lindsay replied. This was going to get heated fast, despite their attempts not to.
"Yeah I'm gonna ask question, I'm worried about you." Danny said. "I screwed up last time and I just got you back. I'm scared somethin's gonna come 'n take you away."
Lindsay took a deep breath, giving up. "You want to know why, Danny? Because I wanted to spend as much time with you before you found out. I wanted to be with you as long as I could before you left me again." Lindsay wanted to take back the words once he'd said them, but they needed to be said. She couldn't look at Danny's face, so she turned her head, wiping a stray tear falling down her cheek.
Danny moved next to Lindsay. He gently tilted her head back toward him. He ran his finger across her cheeks, wiping away her tears. "Hey, I ain't leavin' you. Not now, not ever again."
"You say that now Danny, but-"
"No, Lindsay. I mean. I swear I'm not gonna leave you, no matter what." Danny explained.
Lindsay wanted to turn her face from Danny, but she couldn't. She was trapped in his eyes. They pleaded with her, begged her to believe him, to trust him. But she knew that it would take more than just this conversation to trust him again. "I wish I could believe you."
"You don't have to, cause I'll show you." Danny said.