A/N: So here's another story but it's short.

Please go with it cos it's a bit weird at first but then becomes Naomily. Anything in bold is one universe, the rest is in real time.

As ever let me know what you think.

Doug sat at his desk as he scanned the file in front of him. When he finished he looked up at the two men, well they were barely more than boys really, sitting opposite.

"Well Mr Cook, your record certainly is colourful." he said in his Welsh lilt.

Cook grinned cheekily, "Most of it weren't my fault, I'm just unlucky."

"Getting kicked out of one agency might be described as bad luck, but being removed from..." Doug paused and flicked through the file again, "hmmm, five, probably means a lot of it was your fault."

There was a gasp from the other person in the office, "You've been sacked five times? Actually lost your job on five separate occasions? Not just once or even twice, but five?"

Cook shrugged, "What's the big deal? So maybe I have differences of opinion with my superiors sometimes, maybe they don't always agree with my slightly maverick approach..."

"Maverick approach? What do you mean? We have a procedure manual, it sets out very clearly what we need to do. You follow the manual to the letter and then everything is ok. How can you argue with that or with your boss? It's not the way things work around here. When you don't follow the process, that's when things go wrong, that's when the whole thing breaks down..." the man was hyperventilating.

"JJ, please calm down." Doug said gently as JJ continued to panic.

"JJ!" he said slightly more loudly but still to no avail.

Cook stared at the wild haired man working himself into a state, he reached over and grabbed him by the shoulders, "Stop it, alright? Stop all this weird shit."

Doug was surprised as JJ immediately closed his mouth and ceased moving.

Cook removed his hands, "What the fuck was that all about?"

JJ took a deep breath, "Sorry, sometimes I spiral away and get locked on. You see on my last assignment something happened and I panicked, I missed my target and Doug had to step in to finish the job."

Cook shrugged, "Don't see the problem. It worked out ok in the end didn't it? Job done."

JJ stared at him as if he wasn't speaking English, "Did you not hear me? I failed, I messed up and someone else had to sort it out."

Cook looked bewildered, "So you made a tiny mistake, you forget about it and move on mate. Christ haven't you ever fucked up before?"

"Prior to this incident JJ was the star performer in the agency, he never missed his target and always got the job done quickly. Since I stepped in his confidence has wavered somewhat..." Doug explained.

"Which is why you want him to work with me." Cook slapped JJ on the back, "Stick with me gay J, I'll teach you there's more than one way to skin a cat."

JJ frowned, "Please don't call me that. Admittedly, my experience with the fairer sex is somewhat limited and I don't like football, which often leads to the conclusion that I am a homosexual but in fact I like girls very much, they just don't seem to like me."

Cook shook his head and laughed, "Seriously mate, there's a lot I can teach you, I'm a pussy magnet."

JJ looked interested, "Really? I mean I've heard your reputation, everyone has, but I thought it was all just empty boasting."

Cook gave him a wink, "All true mate, all completely true."

"So Little Red Riding Hood?" JJ questioned.

"Gagging for it. Didn't mind finding me in bed and it weren't my big teeth or eyes she was commenting on if you know what I'm sayin." Cook replied with a dirty laugh.

Doug coughed, "I think we all know what you mean Mr Cook, but as interesting as this is, can we please focus on your assignment?"

He waited until they turned back to him, "Thank you. You were correct Mr Cook, part of the reason we paired you with Mr Jones was to help him regain some confidence in his ability. However, we were also hoping some of his more ordered approach might rub off on you too."

"There ain't anything wrong with the way I do things." Cook spluttered.

Doug raised his eyebrow, "I beg to differ Mr Cook and so does the Easter Bunny not to mention all your previous employers."

Cook scowled, "The Easter Bunny is a bitch, hated me on sight."

"Hmmm and the others?" Doug responded.

"Dunno, they didn't like me either." Cook replied more unsurely.

Doug leaned forward, "Mr Cook, I've read your file. You don't like taking orders, doing things by the book or working as part of a team. You are dismissive to the point of being arrogant of any approach that differs from yours and you flagrantly disobey your superiors on a regular basis."

"So why am I here then?" Cook questioned petulantly.

Doug smiled, "There are also real flashes of brilliance in your work, random acts of kindness and displays of compassion. You may not always follow the rules but it's obvious you always care about the people you are trying to help. Here at Cupid Inc, qualities like that count for a lot which is why we were prepared to give you a chance when other parts of Mythical Industries wouldn't touch you with a barge pole. But make no mistake Mr Cook, this is not a second or even sixth chance, it's the last chance you're going to get."

Cook gulped, he knew his options were running out, "Fair enough Doug, I'll try to be good. What's this assignment then?"

Doug passed them a piece of paper, "This is an interesting case actually. I presume you know how these things usually work?"

Cook looked slightly sheepish, "I might not have been paying that much attention."

Doug tutted, "Mr Jones..."

JJ cleared his throat, "Mythical Industries, as I'm sure you're well aware given you've, er, moved around it a lot, is a series of companies that exist to make sure the humans keep believing in magic and mystery, without it their lives become empty and they become bitter. That's when wars happen and if we don't stop it they'll simply end up killing each other until the whole race dies out."

Cook rolled his eyes.

"There are some bigger, better known parts of the company. Happily Ever After, which deals with keeping fairy tales alive; the Easter Bunny, which you know all about; the Tooth Fairy, although that division is struggling a bit at the moment, kids these days expect so much more for their teeth and of course there's Father Christmas..." JJ rattled off.

"Prick." Cook muttered under his breath.

JJ stopped, "I've always found him to be a lovely man, don't get to see him much given how busy he is but Mrs Christmas is a superb cook."

Cook shrugged, "Well he was a right cunt when I was in the North Pole."

Doug looked sceptical, "Hmm, and that had nothing to do with him nearly missing delivery one year because you were distracting so many of his helpers. Do continue Mr Jones."

JJ stared at Cook, "That was you? You nearly ruined Christmas for all the children across the world."

Cook grinned at him, "Sorry man, but when little Cook gets an urge, I can't help myself."

"Mr Jones..." Doug said with a warning tone.

"Sorry. As well as the larger companies there are also a series of less well known operations. Cupid Inc is one of these, the humans don't even know we exist and we work very hard to keep it that way." JJ continued.

"So you're like some secret organisation?" Cook asked.

JJ nodded, "Yes, and in my view were one of the most important."

Cook started to get impatient, "So come on then, spit it out, what is it you do?"

JJ puffed out his chest proudly, "We make sure people find their soul mates."

"Soul mates? Don't tell me you believe in that crock of shit?" Cook said incredulously.

JJ looked puzzled, "Of course I do..."

"Seriously? All of that true love, 'the one' is out there crap?" Cook continued.

"Absolutely, I firmly believe that certain people are destined to be together and I want to help them find each other in any way I can. That's why I was so upset on my last case, because of my incompetence two humans might have missed each other and ended up with the wrong people, that's four lives ruined." JJ said with conviction.

Cook still looked doubtful, "You're mad mate, you shouldn't get so caught up in work, it's only a job."

JJ gasped, "No it isn't, this is a vocation. I care deeply about what I'm at this organisation to do, the humans' happiness depends on me doing it well, the least they deserve is that I don't see it as 'just a job' or treat my assignments flippantly."

"Alright man, calm down. I get it you're passionate about it. Keep your freakishly curly hair on." Cook said holding his hands up in surrender. "So how does it work?"

JJ coughed, "Well, we have an incredibly sophisticated computer programme, it models millions of scenarios every minute based on random interactions the humans have and it maps out path of how they are supposed to meet. It provides us with the names of our targets and we make sure we're in the right place at the right time so we can shoot them with an arrow so they fall in love."

"As in bow and arrow? Don't sound sophisticated to me." Cook scoffed.

JJ sighed, "The company has developed considerably since its early years and the technology has improved. We now get updates on iPhones for example and we are no longer required to dress as cherubs, which was always a bit embarrassing to be honest, but the fundamental way we complete our task hasn't altered, it's still the only effective way. I've spent a long time working out the probabilities and if you focus on the critical path points this method has a 0.001 percent chance of failure if executed correctly."

Before Cook could answer Doug interrupted, "As you can see we take our responsibilities seriously here Mr Cook. However, now we can move on to why this case is interesting. Unfortunately, our computer has a bug and isn't working correctly. We're trying to fix it as quickly as possible but in the meantime..."

JJ visibly paled, "But it can't have... I always check it... It never goes wrong... Let me see it..."

"I'm afraid that's not possible JJ, we need you on this assignment." Doug explained.

"But we're going in blind... I... I can't do it... we'll fail again... lives ruined... all my fault..." JJ stammered.

Cook grasped his shoulders again, "Come on gay J, your brains, my cunning, what can go wrong? So maybe we don't have all the gizmos but you're experienced enough to do it, I know you are. It'll be a piece of piss mate."

"That's the spirit Mr Cook, it'll be like one of those historic reality programmes where they have to survive on their wits without mod cons." Doug said encouragingly.

By now JJ had calmed down a little, "So this is sort of like an experiment?"

Doug clapped his hands together "Exactly, it's quite exciting when you think about it. The only information we have at the moment is the company where you need to be and some potential candidates. It should be on your phones."

They both checked and sure enough the limited information had arrived.

"HAL Advertising, never heard of it." Cook said peering at the screen.

"It's quite well known, the name comes from the initials of its founder, Harriet Lawes." Doug helpfully supplied.

JJ seemed more interested in the list of possible targets, "Effy Stonem, Katie Fitch, Emily Fitch, Frederick McClair and Naomi Campbell."

Cook snorted, "Bet she gets a lot of stick about that."

JJ frowned, "About what?"

"Her name, same as the miserable supermodel?" Cook said shaking his head as JJ stared blankly, "Jesus J, you need to get out more."

"You need to concentrate and focus on our task. At least we've got one half of the couple sorted." JJ responded.

"How do ya figure that out mate?" Cook asked.

"Well, it has to be Frederick and one of the girls." JJ said as if he was speaking to a small child.

Cook got up and slapped him on the back, "Or we might get some girl on girl action."

JJ paused, "I hadn't thought of that. It's possible, I suppose, but unlikely given that the probability of two of them being gay is far less than it being a heterosexual relationship, somewhere in the region of six percent versus 94."

"Honestly gay J, ain't you ever heard of wish fulfilment?" Cook said as he headed for the door.

JJ followed him, "why would that be wish fulfilment?"

Cook stared at him, "I've got a lot of educatin to do, we'd best get started."

JJ panicked, "But we need to plan things properly, we can't just turn up. We need to sort out our hypotheses early on and test each theory thoroughly."

Cook shook his head and dragged him through the door, "Stop bloody fretting gay J..."

"I've asked you not to call me that..." JJ replied crossly.

"Sorry mate but until we get you laid the name stays." Cook shot back.

"Get me laid? I can't be distracted with trivial things like that..."

Doug smiled as he heard them continuing to bicker down the corridor. He waited until the voices had faded and picked up the phone.

"Put me through to number one please." he instructed.

An annoyed voice soon came on the phone, "I'm busy, this had better be important."

"Sorry number one, but I thought you'd like to know 'operation back to basics' has begun." Doug replied.

There was a pause, "So they bought the story about the computer?"

Doug nodded, "Hook, line and sinker."

"And JJ didn't freak out too much?" came the next query.

"A little bit but surprisingly Mr Cook appears to be able to calm him down. I think they'll make quite a team." Doug stated confidently.

"Really? That is a pleasing development. And Mr Cook?" the voice continued.

Doug paused, "Every bit as cynical as we were told, he's really lost his way but I'm confident JJ can influence him too."

"Excellent, do keep me fully informed Doug, there's a lot riding on this one." the voice said as the phone was put down.

Doug smiled again as he replaced the phone, he was well aware that a lot of people we're being tested here but the thought of it actually made him giddy with excitement.

"Just like the good old days." he muttered to the room as he picked up the next file, "bring it on."