Title: Torn Fairytales
Rating: T
Note: Take it as you will.
It's not healthy but that's fine, not a big deal (she hasn't been healthy in years). That's not what gets her, pushes her down into a depression so deep she can't breathe.
Here's what does: It's not the truth. (Except it kind of is, it's just the truth of Santa Clause and the Easter Bunny) and that's the problem.
Here's the delusion: She should hate him. Hate him for breaking her, taking her heart and stomping on it until it's not longer beating.
Here's the truth (the real, achingly broken one): She doesn't at all.
He broke her, left in this horribly ironic, demeaning kind of way and it hurts. (Oh so freaking bad.)
And she should hate him, needs to hate him because this thing, this dragging it out mess she can't seem to stop doing is just ripping the hole back open over and over again.
She doesn't have a heart, (she's the Ice Queen and people don't expect her to have one) so why, dear God why does it feel like that big gaping hole in the middle of her chest is where he tore out everything that kept her somewhat glued together.
It wasn't supposed to happen, ever. He's the prince and he had his princess and nowhere in that story was there supposed to be any mention of her. (Must have been in the fine print.)
Their story was supposed to stay in her dreams (because her nightmares were already reality.)
The ironic thing is he didn't come as a white knight, on his noble steed hell bent on rescuing her. He came drunk and really she should have known she wasn't supposed to be saved.
It was quick and harsh and everything she never wanted for them. (But she takes what she can get until he doesn't want to give anymore.)
It starts fast and ends fast and doesn't really hurt until she realizes she can lock her window again because he stopped climbing in. Then everything shatters in front of her, and the concept of ever moving again (let alone breathing) seems like too much.
She heard once that you can only break so much before you begin to heal so she waitswaitswaits until that moment when air can successfully make its way back to her lungs without tearing the hole back open, but it never happens.
He has his princess and she was just the shiny toy he wanted to play with until it got boring. She knew that before it even began, and yet she still allowed it to happen. (Because dammit Ice Queens shouldn'tcouldn't ever bleed.)
It's not healthy but that's fine, not a big deal (he hasn't been healthy in years). That's not what gets him, pushes him down into a depression so deep he can't breathe.
Here's what does: It's not the truth. (Except it kind of is, it's just the truth of Santa Clause and the Easter Bunny) and that's the problem.
Here's the delusion: He wants who he has and that's the end.
Here's the truth (the real, achingly broken one): He broke her and somehow he still bleeds.
She hates him and he's okay with that. (Except he's really not, and he's reminded of that every time she walks by.)
She doesn't have a heart (because she isn't supposed to dammit) but he can't shake the feeling that she did until he tore it out.
He didn't mean for it to happen (But that doesn't change anything because it still did and he still broke her and somehow unintentionally broke himself.) He has his princess because his title is prince and they have a fairytale to follow. (But he can't help wishing he could be King.)
It wasn't a fairytale, just some screwed up version of a bad high school movie. He's drunk and she looks angry and vulnerable at the same time and he wasn't trying to save her. (He also wasn't trying to destroy her but he couldn't have it both ways.)
It ends as quickly as it starts and it doesn't hurt until he's standing there with Gabriella on his arm wishing she smelled like coconuts. Then he drops to his knees and goes home sick with the flu. (They're almost the same thing right?) He can barely see straight and maybe he needs to go to the hospital because he feels empty and that can't be a good sign.
He doesn't heal because he doesn't acknowledge he's broken until he walks past her in the hallway (she smells broken-hearted)and spends fourth period in the bathroom vomiting. But by then the wound's too big to heal so he slaps a band-aid over it and prays infection hits.
She was supposed to be his shiny new toy until his old one appealed to him again and he knows she knows that and it's not fair because dammit Ice Queens aren't supposed to bleed. (But again, neither was he.
Note: Yea, I know. Like I said: take it as you will.