Disclaimer: I own nothing. These characters and this love story belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

English is my second language! Have that in mind...

My memories surfaced and I remembered Alice's confidence in Bella's future. How the future would come about was imperceptible to her. But the visualization of Bella dead in my arms—or with crimson eyes was clear.

Well, the future came quickly and I couldn't fight that.

Kaure's words filled in the blanks. My questions to her were a struggle for a loophole, a difference in series of events. Another path that Bella could be following. The events she told me about were old Ticuna Indian legends—but the legends applied well to our situation. The measures were simple and identical.

I threw the bags in the boat—irate.

How could I have let this happen?

I was barely able to keep my appearance straight in front of Bella. Kaure was distinct on the word—death. Her voice and her words haunted me. Awareness of what I had done to Bella made me wish that I could rip my head off and burn it.

It felt instinctive. Irresponsible. I was irresponsible.

Get a grip.

I thought of Carlisle. I could almost feel his patience despite the distance. His words on the phone weren't informative. They were compassionate.

Carlisle, I'll put my faith in you hands.

The least I could do—was to support her. Hold myself back until we were back in Forks. If I let the frustration run free, she would turn anxious. I wanted stability for her, for now. Just a few more hours…

Her expression told me nothing when I tried to interpret the image of her, holding her stomach. She was just as caught up in herself as I was. Afraid.

I returned to the house and she was by the door, holding the last couple of things in her brittle hands. She was about to break my heart countless times these days.

"I'm ready now," she said in a hollow voice. She reached out to hand me my phone without looking up to meet my gaze.

I locked the door and put my arm around her as we strolled down to the boat. She was tense and preoccupied. She had an adequate reaction for once. I had planted a repulsive seed from myself to grow inside her fragile body. I tried to push back those thoughts.

The dead heart wrenched in my chest.

The engine roared. I was watching Bella sit pale at the edge of the bench as we flew through the supple waves. Her face told me she was angry. As if she hadn't the right to feel that way…

"Edward, please slow down," she whimpered. "Nausea."

Or expressed her face queasiness?

Stupidity hit me as I reduced the speed. "Lie down and close your eyes. This will be over soon." I was eager to get to the shore, then to the airport, to put her in the plane and go home, as soon as possible.

What kind of misery was this? Bella in both physical and psychological distress due to my previous actions. Impious fool. I was over a hundred years old and wasn't vivid enough to practice safe sex. Maybe I was caught in the mental state of being a teenager after all.

Everything was off beam. The sight of her face, pale and torn threw my thoughts towards anger and devotion. It would be difficult to show either one without experiencing the other. I couldn't find the words to comfort her. I was terrified in her company. And the way home was long enough. The trip to the docks was an additional twenty minutes to what it used to be. Even worse—the flight was cancelled when we finally arrived at the airport.

After a frenzy acquaintance with the airline company I luckily got hold of two tickets for the next morning. The detached female behind the desk was the first woman in a long time who wasn't dazzled by the sight of me. She was terrified.

So what.

She would think no less of me than that I was another dissatisfied customer.

When I got Bella between the sheets at the airport hotel that night I realized we hadn't really spoke much about this at all. Just an occasional instructive sentence of usual conversation between—what felt like hours—of condemned silence.

"We will get through this." I was slowly kissing her face, hoping that she would get calm enough to fall asleep. And fast. I felt an obligation to entertain her that I didn't care for. I tried caressing her skin to create some tranquility and that actually seemed to ease her. "I love you Bella." Throughout our last tropical night I held my cool body around hers. The only thing I could offer at this time.

The only good thing I had left.

The first ounce of relief was to walk the aisle of the airplane. I played with the thought of visiting the landing strip and kick start the plane myself. But soon it took off on itself. Bella's face was the palette of Claude Monet's water lily period. She had not been able to keep any other food but fluids.

A slender brunette in a red uniform came walking towards our direction, but hesitated at the sight of Bella.

Oh Lord! What's wrong with her! She looks awful. And about to vomit...

I quickly grabbed the paper bag from the seat pocket in front me to unfold it in front of Bella's howling face. It tormented me.

She better not have the stomach flu. The airline policy is to reject ill passengers, but I'm not sure I'll be able to take such actions. I hate being harsh.

The flight attendant caught Bella's eye. She put on a deep caring face and used a smooth voice when she spoke to her. "Are you alright?"

I wish I was her.

Uninformed. Non-suffering.

Bella shuddered holding the paper bag. "I will be. I'm sorry." Stupid innocent Bella. Stop apologizing for matters you can't amend. "I'm… pregnant." Bella looked at me, as if the word was forbidden fruit.

What was she thinking?

The flight attendants concerned face lightened. "Oh, well then, congratulations!" she said with a careful but representative smile.

Poor thing. She looks awful.

"Is there anything I can get you?" She turned to watch me instead and flinched.

Wow! What's with him? Concerned, sure…. But that furious expression… Maybe greetings weren't appropriate. He is about to burst... Keep smiling… Keep smiling…

I got Bella several drinks, not sure what taste she would tolerate, and a few blankets. I made sure the attendant left unscathed. Her thoughts reminded me of Angela Weber's which triggered my better manners.

The temperature and the air conditioning in the plane were poles apart to the humidity in Rio. I pulled my sweater off and Bella put it on. She hadn't got much sleep last night. She looked worn. I wrapped one blanket on her pulled-up legs and tucked it in tight. The other one was used as a cushion to my hard chest as she leaned on me.

The lullaby came gently and worked as well as diazepam on her. To my delight the shivers stopped and she fell asleep.

A few weeks ago I had told her that I wished for the possibility for us to produce a child. And here I was. Despaired, with everything I've ever wanted in my hands.

I found myself powerless to keep my thoughts on hold. I didn't want to cause an outbreak on the plane though. I was still responsible for Bella. But as soon as my family would approach us I would let go. Leave her to someone else's care. Probably Alice's. Esme's support would be efficient as well. I could take the time to unwind somewhere else. Alone.

Prick. Don't go there.

I imagined me darting the woods. But I couldn't predict the release it should provide. Briefly frowning at a memory, I saw more aid at the sight of me hitting a tree, all the trees. Crushing them down one after one until the pain would be extinguished.

Selfish bastard.

Here I was, longing for the release of my pain. I wasn't looking for possibilities for my wife to be safe. I wasn't even discussing her feelings. Asking her about them. I realized that the only thing worse than the pain I suffered was Bella's destiny, her thoughts, her pain… I told myself that I was protecting myself from even more ache by not exploring those things. And an airplane was certainly not the place for that kind of conversation.

I tried to watch her sleep as I usually do. Watching every position. Every move she makes. Her eyelids fluttered lightly.

Please stay.

Her hair was a wild river running down her shoulders. I held a strand of her dark cap in my hand for a while before putting it to place behind her ear. My head dropped to lean on hers. I submerged in her scent.

Finally.

Huston, Texas.

Bella was almost asleep as I pushed her forward between gates. I found myself ignoring any chance to a conversation. It felt easier to express my affection through touching her. It seemed safer. So I made sure to cover any verbal recoil with a tender touch. I didn't want to think about what she could say. Not here anyways. What reactions her thoughts would bring on me. No, not here.

I played my physical part well, as soon as we found our seats Bella cuddled up to my chest to fall back to sleep. I relaxed and let whatever feelings I had fill me.

My Bella was a prisoner in her own body. What may come from this? Carlisle sure didn't have an answer to those kinds of questions. He could tell the maternity aspects of a human being but not the aspects of a pregnancy like this one. Was Bella going to die? How was she going to die? What was growing inside her?

Unintentionally my mind opened up to the most repulsive scenario I could imagine. Bella's body wrenching in pains from having her pelvis flipped open by something that was more of a Tasmanian devil than a human or a vampire.

Cheap horror movie stills.

Seriously.

Will it be one or the other? Or us two combined? Maybe it won't even be an individual. Maybe the duplication is disturbed by the diverse nucleuses of our reproductive cells—creating no more than a lump of flesh which will not breathe or live at all?

Kaure never got to that part.

I have more chapters in progress. If you're curious... =)