Prologue

The first time I saw her I knew I was going to like her. The way she stormed into the carriage and asked in a know-it-all voice whether we had seen a frog. A frog! Despite how crazy the question was I felt this need to help her- my 'friends' scoffed at her but her face didn't change. She was strong willed, I liked that.

"Well have you?" I looked at the faces around me and they all looked surprised. It was no secret that they were Slytherin, born and bred, and they hated being talked down to by an outsider.

"No we haven't and your name is?" Blaise asked, his features twisted into a sneer. I was so unused to seeing Blaise so full of hatred but his father had always been tough on him to become the stereotypical Slytherin.

"Hermione Granger, well if that's all." She sauntered confidently out of the carriage, not realising the mistake she had just made.

Every year my father somehow managed to get the list of all the new first years and their blood status. He would then proceed to send it to his friends with children who were expected to become Slytherin. We then had to memorise the list and learn who it was acceptable to associate with and who we shouldn't. This girl telling us her name meant that we now knew more about her than just who she was- now we knew her blood status and to all our fathers that was all that mattered. Not how nice she was or how talented, her blood status would dictate her treatment for her entire Hogwarts experience- and she was a muggle born, a Mudblood- I felt sorry for her. She never asked for any of this.

This girl that I had wanted to be friends with, who intrigued me with her fiery nature, was a disgrace to the wizarding world. I would never be allowed to be friends with her and that made her all the more interesting.

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We didn't even need to go into Flourish and Blotts, we had all the books in the Malfoy Library back at home but the minute my father saw Arthur Weasley and his family he couldn't resist at taking a jab. Then I saw her.

Oh why did she have to be here? I had mistakenly mentioned her to my father and I had been forced to reveal everything that I knew about her and now they were in a shop together. I had tried to protect her by calling her a Mudblood, by bullying her, Weasel and Potter and then telling my father about it- it was the only way that he wouldn't suspect how much I admired her. But I couldn't protect her when she and him were in the same room. I wished she had stayed at the back of the bookshop . I hated being mean to her but what else could I do?

If I had dragged up enough courage to be nice to her my father's wrath would hit me like the fires of hell. He and Blaise's father had been talking and now I knew how brutally his father treated him. I wasn't punished often but when I was it... it was enough to make me fall in line and never want to disobey him again.

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She punched me! Hermione Granger the goody-two-shoes punched me! I deserved it after what I did to the Hippogriff. I hadn't meant to cause its death but I had meant to get Hagrid into trouble. My father wanted him fired. Seeing how upset Hermione was, I knew I had deserved it. Hell I deserved to be hexed. I waited for another punch but it didn't come. I looked into her eyes and they were so full of anger and hatred- all of it directed towards me. An overwhelming sadness overcame me and I ran off feigning that I was frightened. I couldn't let her see any weakness in me.

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She walked down the steps a vision in pink. Her dress complimented her complexion to perfection setting off the honey tones in her sleek and glossy hair. Her freckled face had a hint of makeup that only served to emphasise her natural beauty.

This was the moment that I finally let myself accept how I felt; I didn't want to be just friends with her, I wanted to be with her. This was a major problem because there was no way on Earth that she'd ever reciprocate those feelings. I felt my heart shatter as Victor Krum swooped in and took her hand in his- she smiled at him the way I wanted her to smile at me. Dejected I let Pansy pull me into the hall.

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Her screams filled the room and my fingers closed around my wand but my mothers hand grabbed my arm- her eyes were filled with fear. I wanted to kill Bellatrix for hurting her but if I did I would die and then Hermione would still be tortured. Her pain echoed around in my head and nothing could stop them from burrowing into my soul and taking root.

I was so grateful when she was rescued and when I finally found her at the battle of Hogwarts alive and well but her agony still plagued me. The guilt of not helping her, of not stopping her pain ate me up. And I could never apologise because she would never believe that I was being genuine- she would only think that I was trying to manipulate her. I had convinced her too well that I hated her and who she was. But that wasn't even the cruelest thing, I had convinced her so well, that she had lost faith in herself and that was unforgivable- I could never forgive myself. I didn't want to.

A/N: Please review :)