Okay, saw the final episode. Needed to right about it to vent some emotion and try to stem the flow of tears. Won't succeed, but it feels good to write again. It's really short, but I didn't want to spend too much time on it. Added lyrics and bars later, so sorry about the original messiness.
Disclaimer: COME ON. If I owned No. 6, it wouldn't have ended at 11 episodes, and it sure as HELL wouldn't have ended with Nezumi LEAVING.
Edit- Lyrics are from 'The Marching Line,' by Vanessa Carlton. Normally I don't do lyric add-ins, because I don;t know enough songs to not make it seemed forced, but this one seemed perfect.
Don't you know that love's like
A bullet in the chest
Sion is dead. Nezumi is waiting to die.
They are alone. Rikiga and Inukasi have already left, trying to save their own skins.
Nezumi wonders if he should have joined them. Then he wonders what the point would have been.
Sion is dead. Nezumi can't see his face. He's covered him up.
It seems almost amazing that just one death can make Nezumi give up on surviving. He's seen too much death already. Countless people. His family. Strangers. Enemies. In the end, it doesn't matter who they were to him.
But even dead, Sion still matters. He has to, because there is no way Sion can suddenly stop mattering.
For the last few months, Sion is the only thing that has really mattered. That kind of thing can't just end in a few seconds.
Saving my life.
Rescuing him.
Trying to protect him.
Teaching him to dance.
Arguing with him.
Coming to this place, this hell with him.
Nezumi's teeth grit.
How could all of it suddenly not matter?
Because, the part of him that can still think and feel whispers, because one you're dead, it's all over. Didn't you tell him that once? It's all over.
And yes, it was true. He had been right, Inukashi had been right. Once you're dead, it's all over. Sion will not dance anymore. He will never learn how to have sex. He won't read any more books. He will learn nothing more, will feel nothing ever again.
Nezumi wants to be that way too, now, wants to stop thinking, and, God, feeling, the feeling he can't stand anymore. Because even though he is the one that lived, and Sion is the one that died, it doesn't feel like either of them will matter again.
What is there without Sion, now? West District is gone, steamrolled over. He has his books and his mice, which was good enough for him before but now, that Sion had named all of his rats (he had told him not to do that, hadn't he, it makes everything so much worse to attach to things) and touched all his books, there was really nothing to go back to that he wanted to see again.
He wonders if Inukashi and Rikiga were able to make it out. He wonders how long it will take for officials to find him. He wonders if they'll just mercy and kill him rather than try to bring him somewhere else. Although, where would they bring him? He is in the correctional facility, technically. He wonders if they would bury Sion properly.
He wonders where Sion's mother is.
He wonders if any of Sion's family is still alive.
He thinks that if so, he is the only one still alive that Sion mattered to, and who mattered to Sion.
He doesn't want to wonder about this anymore.
He curls up by Sion, so his hand just brushes the other's cold one, closes his eyes, and tries to sleep, trying to ignore the wet substance that's not quite blood running down his nose and how much his legs and arms hurt.
And I never say it
Never known a day without
Quiet regret