A/N: So this little story has been bugging me for too long now, so I have given in and decided to try writing it. It's basically going to be centred on Emma, and actually uncovering the issues of her past. I felt the show went too suddenly from not acknowledging her parents as such, to suddenly accepting them. So this story will be exploring the realities of Emma's walls and struggles to accept her family.
The story is set after the most recent series (5) and in canon up to then. Though not really including the cliffhangers of the finale.
CaptainSwan are canon, so that is there. But I have to admit he would get in the way in my story, so he won't really be in it to begin with.
SwanQueen...yes, I am holding true to the canon of the show...so their bond is there and their "friendship" with hints of more. Sticking 100% to how they are on the show. But who knows...could be endgame ;)
Mostly I just want to write a real story exploring Emma's fears, her past and her relationships.
It had been three weeks since the foray into the land of untold stories. The battles there had been resolved with surprising ease, even Belle had been restored to her waking self, and Mr. Gold was working tirelessly to win her back and earn the love and trust of not only her, but their unborn child. Storybrooke had returned to its subdued self and daily life had resumed for all its residents. The only change had been the loss of Hook, a loss that Emma bore with a stoic silence. It had not been death that separated them this time, but a choice. Hook had insisted he earn the title and trust which Emma bestowed upon him, and to do that, he must right old wrongs. He didn't give much away beyond that. But simply stated that he needed to prove to her and to himself that he could truly be the man that she deserved. And so he had set sail on a borrowed boat, to places unknown, to settle scores untold. Emma's insistence that he not go or that she accompany him had been stopped by a letter found in the early hours of a dawn, when she found her bed empty and realised that he had not given her the choice.
Emma had missed the subtle comfort she had unknowingly come to find in the pirate, the distraction from any or all other aspects of her life. And so since his departure, she had somehow found herself at a loss as to how to once again navigate the strange life she had found herself in. Henry was gradually growing up, demanding increasingly less of her time, content to branch out his social life to involve friends his own age, as well as burgeoning relationships as only a teenager can. Snow and David had settled into their blissful family routine, caring for their charming son and revelling in the chance to bask in their quiet family life, without imminent threat of attack to tear it apart. Without a common evil to defeat, a threat to their safety binding the townsfolk, the family together, Emma found herself strangely detached from those around her, as though, without the ardent fear of lives at stake, they didn't know how to survive. Their communication was so centred on life or death situations, quests where the stakes were the highest they could be, where disaster and and despair lurked at every turn. Now, in the quiet peace of tranquility, Emma realised, that she had no idea how to just be, with her family. She trusted them implicitly to save her life, but in the mundane reality of the every day, she almost felt that she barely knew them at all.
Clutching the mug of hot chocolate to her cold hands, Emma Swan stared mindlessly into the steam that rose steadily. Her thoughts were lost in aimless reveries as she sat alone in the semi darkness of her small apartment. The house she and Hook had planned, the one that Henry had chosen, after everything that had happened, the darkness she had taken into herself, the darkness that place had seen, it had no longer felt like home to any of them. So instead, Emma found herself renting a small apartment, alone. Hook could have come, Henry should have come, but there was something that held Emma back, a small thorn in the happiness of the family she had created, an itch on the edge of her mind. So she had made her excuses, talked of them all getting settled back into Storybrooke and into normal routines before jumping into anything. She'd spoken of needing to find the right place for them all, so they would find other places until that spark of perfection could be found. She'd thought up a dozen reasons, excuses, avoidances; anything she had to do.
Her home was simple, a small, two bedroom apartment, exposed brick and peeling paint. Henry, when he had first come to see the place had innocently drawn similarities between the apartment and his grandparents', causing Emma a brief moment of disquiet, before shirking off the comments, not wanting to explore what that meant. However, for all the similarities in the two homes, Emma's held none of the cosy kitsch of the other woman's house. The accents of metal and glass, the muted greys of the sleek but comfortable furniture; there was a sense of minimalistic detachment, more like a hotel than a home. Whenever Henry visited, he couldn't help being drawn back to the place where he had first met his mother. However, if closely inspected, the signs of her new life were there, if only in the smallest of ways. The second bedroom which held unmistakable signs of her teenage son, being the most the loss of Robin, he had found himself needing to be with Regina, so the bedroom in the small apartment had barely been used, but the signs were still there.
The only other items which would allow any outsider to discern who lived in the property were the photographs in frames on the end tables, shelves, bedside cabinets. There weren't many and almost all were of Henry, or Emma and Henry together, just one of Emma and her mother was present, it was years old, from before the curse had broken. Henry had offered to take more pictures but Emma had brushed off the suggestion by changing the subject without his notice. Even when he had brought her a small stack of photographs, of Emma with her parents, with them all together, with her and her mother, somehow Emma had chosen not to frame them, not to display them. She had made her excuses, that she hadn't got around to it, that she was busy with work, but still the only photograph she tolerated of her family outside Henry was the one old picture, Mary Margaret and Emma smiling over their mugs of hot chocolate in a brief respite of cheerful conversation.
Emma sighed, noting how her fingers still felt icy around the warmth of the mug in her hands. She reluctantly set the drink back onto the marble countertop before going to check the thermostat. Clicking the dial up a few notches in hopes of breaking through the chill that settled in her apartment, the wind eeking through gaps in old window frames she had not yet got around to fixing. The boiler rumbled into action with a comforting growl before suddenly emitting loud clunking noises and puttering out.
"Really?!" Emma frustratedly barked into the still emptiness. She huffed to herself, pouring the rest of her drink into the sink angrily, knowing she would more than likely regret that hasty action in barely five minutes. She resigned herself to the prospect of an early night, if only to keep warm.
Pulling the covers tightly around herself, trying to keep in what little heat they provided, Emma stared blankly into the room, lit only by the solitary bedside lamp. Her fingers entwined themselves unconsciously into the threads of her baby blanket under her pillow as she lay curled on her side. A strange pang of sickness hit her as a vague pain throbbed through her chest. It was familiar and enough to make her close her eyes in an attempt to block it out, as her fingers coiled themselves more firmly into the fabric. She settled into an uneasy sleep to the sound of chilled breezes whispering through the old wooden window frames.
A/N: A bit of a slow start, I know. But wanted to establish where the characters are in time, situation and emotion.
Please, PLEASE let me know what you think and if this story interests at all? I have a good 40+ chapters planned and would love to write and post if people want to read.
Please review to let me know? xx