WARNING: Dark humour, swearing
DISCLAIMER: The characters belong to Marvel.
After a whole weekend moving his belongings to the Stark's household – and recovering from the scene both Tony and Peggy performed, with Wanda lecturing him about the different levels of hullabaloos that could occur in there after he'd overcome the shock – Peter found himself finally living with the rest of the Avengers, under the same roof.
Aunt May seemed more relaxed after meeting with the main team. She still was reluctant to let go of their last hug before she went abroad, making Peter to blush under the attentive look of the heroes.
A wee smile made its way upon his lips when he received a text from her at round 10 pm.
Auntie [22.07]: Hope you're fitting in just right! Don't go to bed too late! Love u 3
Six hours, thought the teenager, humming in genuine amazement when he made the calculus inside his head. That's a new record from her.
Pete [22.08]: They're very nice with me here! I will, I know it's school night…. Love u 2
After receiving no answer and see the text was left unread, Peter assumed she had fallen asleep from exhaustion and smiled fondly at the mental image. He decided to follow suit, placing his phone on the nightstand and closing his eyes, waiting for Morpheus to take him to a peaceful dream.
By 12.45 am, Peter had tried all imaginable ways to fall asleep in.
By 2.15, he stopped looking at the ceiling, when certain places that weren't painted properly started to form strange faces in the darkness of the room.
By 3.55, he had to go to the bathroom, slightly scared when he saw a light from downstairs. He'd never been gladder to know how to be silent when needed.
By 4.25, YouTube began to fail at its propose of entertain or lull him to an exhausting slumber.
By 5.40, he fell asleep with the phone clung to his chest, little snores coming out from his mouth and an unfinished test of Which Character Are You on the screen before it turned black automatically.
By 7.10, the alarm rang.
By 7.20, his bedroom door was swung open and Wanda marched to him with a grim face, snatching the phone from his hands and throwing him her pillow to the head.
That finally woke Peter up, though not entirely.
"Wha…?" he asked, groggily, trying to adjust his eyes.
Wanda didn't answer. She simply silenced the alarm and threw the phone on the nightstand.
"If your alarm starts to go off for ten minutes each morning, you'll not last in here" she warned, turning on her heels and stepping out the room.
Peter stood there, lost. "What?" he repeated again.
He turned his head slowly to the nightstand, watched his phone for a minute, before something inside his head made click and his eyes grew wide; all slumber gone form his eyes but the tiredness of a night with no proper rest still weighting on him.
"Shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot" he muttered, under his breath, jumping of bed, falling to the ground, crawling to his desk, getting up in another jump and taking off his pyjamas, thanking May for giving him the habit of prepare his clothes the night prior.
Peter stormed out his room, still muttering curses and praying to all gods he knew and doubted about for not being late. Or too late.
"Psst" someone called, making him stop dead in his tracks in the middle of the hallway. Peter turned to his left, to see a door barely opened, just enough for him to see the half of a face. "Is there people down there already?"
"Where?" asked Peter, after taking a couple of cautious steps back.
"The first floor"
Peter's sleepy brain finally recognised the voice as Loki's. "Uh, I don't know. I'm late for school, I haven't…"
He shut his mouth rapidly when he saw Loki's eyes squinting in annoyance. The brunet god closed the door slowly, giving the teenager the creeps. Peter took his notebook out, went to the last page and wrote: 'Mr Loki is either strange or too grumpy in the mornings', and then sprinted downstairs.
He bumped into Clint in the staircase.
"Hi, Peter"
"Good morning, Clint. Are you going somewhere?" he asked, hopeful for a ride.
"Yes, to bed" he replied, with a yawn in the end.
"To bed?" asked Peter, flabbergasted.
"Yep, I've been up all night watching anime with Bucky and now it's my time to sleep"
Well, that explained the lights he saw last night when he went to the bathroom.
"Do you think you could drop me off before going to sleep?" he still asked, not losing faith.
"I don't think that's a good idea if you want to get there in one piece" replied the man, before going up completely.
Well, that goes nothing… This morning, he had to run, it seemed.
Peter descended the last steps and came rushing to the kitchen, to prepare something fast to eat as he went. During that time, he heard a noise upstairs but barely paid it any attention to prevent to cut one of his fingers. He shoved one half of his poorly made sandwich in his mouth and held the other for dear life as he was about to sprint out the kitchen.
Peter had no more remedy than stopped abruptly once again when he saw Tony going downstairs as silently as he could while damning all the living things he knew. The adult also stopped when he noticed him there, catching him red-handed. Peter's eyes slowly went to the blanket Tony was holding, and he looked back up with a questioning glare after seeing the huge dark red stain in the middle of the white sheet.
"Ah, true… With you here, there are finally people up this soon in this house now…" commented Tony, half-closing his eyes. He looked at his watch with a frown. "Thought you had to be gone by now?"
"I overslept" admitted Peter, mouth full.
"Well, by the time it already is, better get in after lunch break" decided the adult, taking Peter by the wrist and taking him with him.
"But I can't do that!" complained the teenager.
"I'll write you a note. Vomits in the morning and wellness in the afternoon, it's a classic" dismissed Tony, opening the basement door, which squeaked loudly, making them wince. The sound earned them an annoyed 'ssh' from the curled up form on the couch.
"Sorry, Bucky!" said Peter, feeling bad.
"It's seven in the morning, parasite, you should be up already" complained Tony, rolling his eyes.
"And you, working" retorted the soldier.
"I work from home" replied the inventor, taking easy offense.
He made a gesture to Peter with the head, so he entered first. The teenager obliged, not very sure about the whole ordeal. Tony went right behind him, but then stopped and, with an evil grin, swung the door repeatedly, making it squeak, laughing cruelly about the annoyed look he received.
"Mr Stark!" admonished Peter.
"I'm gonna tell Steve" warned Bucky, tossing his blanket aside and going upstairs.
"Bye, bye" said Tony, not minding his words, and he closed the door quietly.
"Don't be mean, he's been up all night with Clint, from what I know" explained Peter.
"That's his problem" shrugged Tony. "Be careful with the steps" he said, placing a hand on the boy's shoulder as they went down.
"What happened?" asked the teenager, as he threw judgemental glares to the blanket the inventor was holding.
"Rhodey spent part of the night here and left his half-full glass on the corner of the nightstand. I knocked it unintentionally and, well…" He tapped his back when they reached the end and pointed at the washing machine with his chin. "Help me with that, will you?"
Peter looked back at the adult, trying control the patronizing tone that almost reached the tip of his tongue. "You don't know how the washing machine works?"
Tony stood there in silence for a moment. "Well, not this one" he ended up admitting. "But I knew how to use the previous one. I can do my laundry" he added, proudful.
"And what happened with the previous one?" he asked, curious.
"The reason why Pepper forbid me to touch this one and prevented me to know how to use it" he answered, opening the drum and tossing the blanket there.
"I don't think that's gonna work" pointed out Peter. "It's a huge stain. It'll still be noticeable when the washing is done"
Tony waved one hand. "I'll make sure to hide them in the farthest corner of the closet"
"No, wait a minute, I'll go fill a bowl with cold water" he said, trotting to the staircase without waiting for an answer.
Tony let the kid do at first when he was back, seeing the mastery Peter had at cleaning the mess and explaining the process. He couldn't contain his tongue any longer:
"How do you know how to do this?"
Peter's silence worried him at first, until he finally admitted. "I had a grandma that didn't have the best of lucks at dating and a few accidents happened. You find anything on the Internet"
Tony sighed relieved and then hummed. "As long as you made sure to look for more than one source. And various Reddit threads doesn't count" He raised one eyebrow at Peter's laughter. "There still are traces of that fatal day when Wanda tried to follow one recipe"
That served to shut the younger one down.