Heading out for a change

Set right after the meeting in the library where Matthew, Mary, Tom and Lady Grantham went against his Lordship in an attempt to modernize and improve the estate. Robert feelt very alone in this, so he decidds to step back and leave the room. He did so with a sad and defeated look.

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As he moved towards the front door passing Edith who was on the phone he grabbed his hat and stick and decided to walk down to the village. As he walked he thought about how difficult many things had been. Not to many others he's sure, but to him it was very hard to adjust to all the changes. He was old fashion in his way of thinking, and he was partly aware of it himself. But anyway he thought to himself that he had tried to do the best he could.

Obviously that was not enough, since the others were so keen on doing the changes. And maybe it was a positive thing, but right then he didn't want to think about it. He just wanted a drink, so he was headed for Grantham Arms pub as soon as he reached the village.

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It had been a busy day so far at the pub. But at this time it was usually more quiet. Some customers had left; only a couple of tables were occupied. Jane stood for a moment by the bar, drying off one of the glasses. She couldn't help but give a little sigh as she heard the bell at the door as a sign that someone had entered the pub.

Jane left the towel on the bench, straitened her apron and sat off to greet the customer without looking for a second. As she did she was faced with the man who she thought was stuck in her heart and mind forever. For a moment the world had stopped turning. They stood there glancing at each other while seconds passed.

At last Jane regained her senses even though her heart was beating several times faster. –"Lord Grantham, how nice to see you,"she said with a smile trying to appear normal.

-"And the same,"answered Robert. He had became quite surprised to see the woman that had been in his mind for so long, ever since she left Downton over three years earlier. Robert tried for a long time to suppress his thoughts and feelings for Jane. But it came to a point where he had given up that; she constantly had turned up in his dreams and thoughts.

-"Please come this way, milord. You can sit here if you like," said Jane with a gesture. She led the way to a table in the corner. –"Can I get you anything, milord?"her voice shaking a bit, but she hoped he wouldn't notice it.

-"A glass of scotch, please, Jane," he replied as he sat down laying his hat and stick on one of the chairs nearby.

-"Certainly, milord, I'll be right back,"she said as she hurried over to the bar ordering it from the bartender. At the same time she tried to slow down her heart from beating so fast. She was very nervous and at the same time happy that he had showed up there. So many times she had hoped and prayed that she would see him again, even though she thought it would never happen. But now he was there; not in her fantasy, but he was now in the same room as herself..For real.

Jane turned her face to look at him as she waited for the drink. Oh…how handsome he was with his dark grey dress, white shirt and a black tie with dark red stripes on it. He had gained a bit more of that silver grey color in his hair but it only made him look more charming. She noticed that he looked as he had a lot of worries on his shoulders.

Soon Jane returned with the drink. –"Here you are, milord,"she said. Robert thanked her for it and asked if she had the time to sit with him for a while. Jane agreed to that and sat herself down opposite from him. They exchanged some fraises about Freddie and Jane expressed her condolences about Lady Sybil. –"How are you, milord?"Jane asked. –"You look like you have a lot of worries."

Robert shook his head a bit.-"Oh..don't mind me. There are some things concerning the family and the estate. But I don't want to trouble you with it,"Robert replied and drank a sip.

-"So you are working here, Jane. If I had known that I would have come to see you much sooner,"he said. His words took her by surprise. Jane thought he had forgotten about her; that what had happen, their stolen kisses and rare meetings, had just been something meaningless to him. But now she gained a little hope. Robert gazed at her again. Jane saw a mixture of longing and sadness in his deep blue eyes.

Robert glanced at her small face with those high cheekbones and that wide sensual mouth of. Those blue and grey eyes, that when they met his, filled him with warmth in his chest and his heart was beating faster. He had never figured out why she had this effect on him. Why he had experienced these feelings when she worked at Downton. He remembered he had watched her in some stolen moments there when she or nobody else had noticed it.

He had feelings of course for his wife, but she had never made him feel like this. When he had been near Jane at Downton, the feelings were completely different. It was the same now when he sat here with her. The desire to hold her and feel her close to him filled him once more with the familiar tingling and excitement.

Robert became aware that he had been starring at her for a while and looked down as he took a sip of the scotch. –"I am sorry for starring at you Jane, but I have to say that you mean a lot to me,"he said and looked at her intensely. –"I know I shouldn't say it but you do, Jane."

Jane felt her heart beating even faster and that red color appeared in her cheeks. She swallowed hard before she said: -"I'm glad you say it, milord, I'm glad you feel like that. That's what I have hoped for since the first time I laid my eyes on you." Jane felt her courage rise along with the feelings raging in her body.

The look of increasingly longing appeared in his eyes as he reached his hand over the table to touch hers. The touch made Jane tremble and give out a little gasp, only loud enough for Robert to hear it. He caressed her hand with tenderness. Jane looked nervous around the room afraid that someone should see it. At the same time she wanted him to continue.

– "Oh Jane….How long must you stay and work here today?"he asked. His voice was low and hoarse. –"I will be off in one hour,"she answered looking over at the clock on the wall. Robert looked at her with an expression on the edge of desperation. –"Please Jane, may I wait for you at your place? I cannot leave without being near you and hold you, he nearly pleaded. –"Not now, when I have found you after all this time,"he added.

Her eyes were blinking rapidly now as she quickly thought about what to say. Jane cleared her voice and whispered with a low tone: -"You may take my key and wait in my house." She told him the address and reached down in her pocket for her house key before she handed it to him.

Robert left some coins at the table for the drink. He took his hat and stick, gave her a quick look before he walked out the door.

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Jane couldn't wait for the last hour to pass. When it finally did, she took her coat and left the pub, and for once she was anxious to reach her house. The little house were usually very dull and empty, but now there was someone there that she had wanted for such a long time, and she couldn't reach it fast enough.

Lord Grantham had locked himself into Jane's little condo. Everything was in place; neat and clean. Just as perfect as Jane herself, he thought. As he sat down on the sofa to wait for her, a slight feeling of guilt came over him. What on earth was he doing there? An earl of the Aristocracy? In this little place belonging to his former maid? He still had the time to leave before she came and prevent what was going to be inevitable if he stayed. But he didn't want that. He wanted to stay and wait for Jane, his precious Jane.

He didn't care anymore. Too long he had tried to live up to what everybody else expected from him.

To what was right and suitable. Of course it was wrong regarding his wife…but the distance between the two of them had been bigger and bigger by the day. Especially after Lady Sybil's death, as she had blamed him for it.

In her favor she had supported and forgiven him for losing all of her fortune. But in the days and weeks after she had became more and more cold towards him, as she had been during the years of war. And now when Matthew had saved them and the house, Robert felt useless. He also felt his wife admired their son in law for managing something himself could not or were not able to do.

He shook off these thoughts as he heard someone at the door. Jane tried to appear calm and natural as she came inside and closed the door, but it was difficult since her heart was almost leaving her body because of its beating.

Robert rose from the place he had been seated and walked towards her. –"Let me help you with your coat,"he said as he took it from her shoulders and hang it on its place beside the door. As he turned they stood for some seconds hesitating. Then the attraction became too strong and Robert closed the distance between them wrapping his arms around her. He looked at her face with such longing and passion that Jane thought she was going to faint.

At last he leaned down to kiss her mouth. This time he did it with tenderness, not like the first time at Downton, when he had gripped her almost violently in the pantry and the kiss had been too possessive. He waited a bit to study her face. –"You are so dear to me, Jane,"he said. Robert reached to loosen her hairpins so her dark, long hair fell down over her shoulders. He gazed at her with admiration.

-"You are very beautiful, my sweet girl,"he almost whispered. And so he kissed her again, now the kisses were more intense and deeper. One of his arms held her firmly around her waist; the other hand started to touch Jane's neck and her collarbone as he helped her unbutton her white blouse. His hand went inside it and tenderly caressing her breasts.

Jane felt the excitement and arousal almost too unbearable. She heard herself moan between his touches and kisses. She started to pull on his jacket and got it off him. She had to hold on to his waistcoat or else she would have fallen because of her dizziness. He noticed it and took hold on both her shoulders.

While Robert held her like that Jane unbuttoned his waistcoat and shirt and pulled it up from his pants. Still wearing his shirt his slightly hairy chest appeared as Jane slipped her hand over it looking from his chest up to his eyes which were full of longing. Her own chest raised and sank along with her heavy breathing. –"Ohm Jane….you are driving me crazy, "he proclaimed heavily as he took off her blouse completely and then released her from her bra.

As it revealed her beautifully and firmly shaped breasts his breathing became heavier as well. –"You are the most beautiful woman I have seen, my darling, "he said and he kissed her deeply again. This time he parted her mouth with his tongue and Jane found herself clinging to his body as if she were afraid of not having enough of him. Her hands reached for his cheek and neck. Robert loved the way she moved her hands through the hair at the back of his neck.

When their mouths this time parted, Jane took his hand and led him to what was her bedroom. The bed wasn't too big, but there were space enough for the two of them. Jane took off her skirt. As they lay down on it, Robert supported himself by his elbow so he could study her body more thoroughly. He stroked his fingers over her chest again and over her breasts, feeling Jane shivering because of his touches. He noticed Jane closed her eyes in pleasure.

Now his fingers went over her stomach; his eyes were widening as he took in her beauty and he lent down to kiss her again. His hand worked on its own, it slid down between her thighs and caressed her part underneath her panties. And as it did, Jane moan out loud, still trembling because of his closeness and touches. She had never felt anything like it; it had never been like this with Freddie's father. The way Robert touched and caressed her made her feel like she was about to turn insane.

-"Ohm..please Robert…"she moaned. Robert looked up at her and an enormous joy and warmth filled his heart. It was the first time she had called out his given name. –"Plea..please Robert, I cannot wait longer. I want to feel you inside of me…"Jane pleaded as her hand went through his hair. Robert took off his pants and laid himself under the covers. Meanwhile Jane had gotten rid of her panties and joined him under the cover.

Robert looked into her eyes with a deep tenderness as he slowly and carefully entered her. Jane gave out a little cry out of pleasure as he did. He started to move inside of her, and breathed more heavily.

He felt her fingernails into his skin on his back as she cried out her passion in his ear.

After a while moving their bodies together in deep and warm passion, they both moaned out load their pleasure.

"Ohm Jane, I think I love you,"he confessed. –"I have probably loved you longer than I dare to confess,"he added as he kissed her again. Then he rolled over on his back one arm under her head, so she could rest it on his chest.

-"My dear Jane,"he said after resting a while. –"I love you, that's for sure, but I hope you can understand that we have to keep it secret for now, considering the circumstances, "he continued.

Jane lifted her head looking up at him smilingly. –"Of course. I don't want you to have more trouble or problems than you already have had. Naturally we shouldn't have done this, but I think we were bound to at one point or another. –This was incredibly special. I have never experienced something like it, Robert," she said while playing with his chest hair.

–"I love you too, Robert. I have never felt a love more strong,"she added. Jane almost had tears in her eyes as she declared it. Robert wrapped his arms more closely around her body. – Ohm Jane, my love,"he said as he knew how difficult it would be leaving her.

He didn't want to do that, but he had to go back to the abbey, to his family and all the expectations. He had to put up an act towards all of them and the rest of the aristocrac; pretending he was happy, when he knew the only place he could achieve happiness was with his precious Jane being in his life.

Of course he loved his family, but he knew that from now on he would only truly love when she was with him. And he could only count the days when the next opportunity would arrive.

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