Chapter One: Time for a Change.
Sometmes in life, you realise things aren't going to turn out how you want them to unless you have the right attitude. Attitudes are a funny thing. They have an effect on everything. The people you surround yourself with, your family, and the reaction you get from them reflects said attitude.
Laying on her bed, Quinn reflects over the last two years, her ups and her downs. She finds it hard to think about this stuff usually, but due to a recents breakdown in a hotel bathroom in New York, followed by a haircut influenced by none other then her frenemy Santana Lopez, she decides it's probably time to get her shit together. Reflecting on your life isnt the easiest thing to do when your life has been full of bad decisions and the wrong attitude, but damn it, she is Quinn Fabray, and facing a problem head on is how she does things. As Quinn mulls things over in head, her thoughts are interupted by a light knock on the door and her mother's head popping into view.
"Sorry to interupt your... daydreams, but i was wondering if you will be coming out of your dungeon today?" Judy says with a smirk plastered on her face.
Ever since Quinn had come back home, Judy stopped her drinking and decided to focus more on her daughter. Quinn has been in her room a lot since she got back from New York. Judy made it her mission to get the girl to smile, and look like she was genuinely happy. So, she started spending more time with her and less time worrying about Russell, or whether the bills were going to get paid, which was like a breath of fresh air. After spending some time together, she realised that she barely knows this girl anymore. She keeps everything swept under the rug, so that no one can see who she really is. Gradually, Quinn's walls came down a bit, and she let her mother see the real her, the Quinn her mother has been missing since they moved. The funny, charming girl she knows wants to be free. The one she has been hiding because she needed to keep her status as Head Bitch In Charge.
"Yes, mother, I think gracing you with my presence is doable today," Quinn replies, trying to sound nonchalant, while holding back a giggle.
Her mother smiles and says, "Well, why don't you go to the mall and get some new outfits for school?"
Quinn considers this for a moment, "I don't see why not. I'll get ready and head out soon."
Judy nods and leaves her daughter to get ready.
Quinn gets up and looks in the mirror. Her hair is everywhere, her eyes have dark circles under them and her clothes she wore to bed are twisted. Wow, well don't you look attractive, she thinks to herself with a chuckle. She gives herself another look over and laughs at how gross she looks and feels.
After a hot shower, Quinn puts on her favourite pair of jeans, a t-shirt, and a light jacket. Not the usual style of dress for her, but today, she really isn't in the mood for baby doll dresses and pretty flats. Stepping in front of her mirror, she takes a look at herself again, but this time she doesn't recognise herself. How can you go from dresses to jeans and a jacket in one week, she will never know.
"Quinnie!" Her mother yells from somewhere downstairs, interrupting her thoughts.
"Coming!" She yells back.
Finishing her mascara, Quinn heads downstairs to find her mother in the kitchen making breakfast.
"You bellowed?" She says as she enters. To which Judy just laughs and shakes her head.
"I do not bellow Quinn Fabray, and I wanted to know if you needed money for your adventure today?" She asks with a smile.
"Yes please," Quinn replies with a shy smile. Which in turn, makes her mother smile even wider and hand her $250. "Oh, no, mom. This is too much-"
"Nonsense Quinnie, it's the perfect amount. Just have fun," she smiles and turns back to her breakfast on the stove.
With that, Quinn kisses her mom's cheek and heads out the door, ready for her 'adventure'.
After a day of shopping, a quick lunch then some more shopping, Quinn finds herself quite happy with what she has bought. Two pairs of jeans, three pretty, girly tops, a pair of blue vans, and two jackets. Now, time for a coffee hit to get her home. On her way to the coffee shops, her phone vibrates in her pocket. While flailing about with bags all up her arms and trying to get her phone out of her pocket and still continuing walking, she finds herself being knocked to the ground by someone walking straight into her. After a few seconds of mental blindness, she gets a grip of herself and looks to see who she has to give a good talking to. To her surprise, her words die in her throat, as she finds none other than Rachel Berry staring down at her with a look of terror across her face.
"Dont just stand there Berry, help me up!" Quinn spits out.
"Sorry!" Rachel squeaks in reply and reaches down to grab Quinn's wrist. With some surprising strength from the Diva, Quinn is on her feet in seconds. Guessing that its years of terror and harassment that does to a person, she lets it slide. Quinn recovers from her fall and turns with a death glare to the small girl in front of her, to which she sees Rachel flinch.
"I am so sorry Quinn. Please don't hit me, I am only small, and I cannot defend myself like Santana or Lauren can. But, if you do, please refrain from getting my nose. As you know I have recently recovered from a hit to it and I don't think you want to be joining me to any more doctors' appointments. Nor would you ever want to do a duet with me again due to you hating me," she finished the last bit quieter than the rest of her rant. Which, weirdly, is the only part Quinn actually hears.
"Jesus freaking Christ, Berry! I'm not going to hit you, and I don't hate you. Maybe instead of daydreaming about which performance of Glee Club's you're going to ruin, you should be watching where you walk!" Quinn finishes a bit louder than she probably should have, which causes Rachel to have a hurt look on her face and her bottom lip slightly quivers.
"I'm sorry," she whispers and Quinn instantly feels a burning sensation in her stomach. Is that regret? She wouldn't know, but that damn midget in front of her just looks so sad. Damn it!
"Argh, just come with me, and i'll buy you a coffee," Quinn says, surprising herself with the invite. Rachel goes from shocked, to scared, to worried all in a few seconds but nods anyway.
Once coffee is bought, the two girls find themselves sitting silently at a table in the back of a coffee shop. They continue to look anywhere but each other while sipping there hot coffees.
"I'm really sorry I knocked you over Quinn," Rachel says quietly, first to break the silence since they entered.
"It's okay," Quinn mumbles back, visibly uncomfortable. Pulling out her phone to check the time, she sees the message that was the cause of her unfortunate and abrupt meeting with the girl in front of her. Rachel see's Quinn check her phone and looks down at her hands feeling rejected and pretty much unwanted, as usual.
Tubbers, you and I are hanging out tonight, I'm coming over around 4. You better be home, bitch - S
Quinn chuckles to herself at Santana's version of inviting herself over. If she thinks she is going to be nice to her after calling her Tubbers, then she is sadly mistaken.
Call me Tubbers again and I will murder you, oh, and see you tonight - Q
Chuckling at her own reply, Quinn sets her phone down on the table to see a curious set of brown eyes staring at her. As Rachel notices Quinn noticing her staring she quickly looks down at her hands. Not wanting to start anything with the HBIC, she decides to just sip her coffee again.
"Alright, enough with the silence, what are you doing here?" Quinn says after getting sick of the awkward tension.
"I'm sorry Quinn, if you would like me to leave so you don't have to be seen with me-"
"I meant at the mall Berry..." Quinn interrupts with a raised eyebrow.
"Oh... Uhh, I am merely shopping, as I can see you are too," Rachel replies with a blush. Quinn just nods in reply. Which is when Rachel notices how short Quinn's hair really is. It is above shoulder length and quite beautifully layered.
"Uhh, I never got a chance to tell you but I think your hair looks really nice," Rachel says shyly staring at her hands. Quinn's eyes widen but then she just mumbles a thank you when brown eyes meet hazel.
"I think it is a nice change, and it really suits your new clothing preferences, but I was also wondering what made you cut your hair so close to performing?" Rachel asks with a smile, feeling more comfortable to say what she thinks. Quinn flinches at the question and mumbles another thanks and to what Rachel thinks was an 'I have to go', before abruptly getting up and walking swiftly out of the coffee shop, leaving a hurt and rejected looking Rachel.
After driving around for an hour or so, Quinn finds herself thinking about her encounter with Rachel Berry. How can Rachel go from saying apologies to complimenting when not ten minutes prior Quinn was yelling at her for knocking her to the floor. It's ridiculous! She doesn't deserve this kind of kindness from the girl! She should definitely not have gone to coffee with her either. It was a bad idea, and now Quinn is going to deal with the backlash, because now Berry will think they are friends. And they are so not friends.
Damn it Fabray, what have you done? She thinks as she stops in her driveway.
Now that she was thinking about it, Quinn couldn't remember a single time she was genuinely nice to the girl, seeing as she always had ulterior motives. Her life hadn't exactly been a bucket of sunshine and rainbows, either. You can't blame her for being pissed at the girl for always meddling in her life. After becoming head cheerleader of the McKinley High Cheerios, then getting pregnant and having a baby girl to the school man whore, then giving said baby up for adoption to Rachel-Freaking-Berry's birth mother, Quinn had come to the conclusion sometime last year, that she needed to be on top to survive after a history like that. Thinking it over right now, Quinn realises how much she has actually lost. Yeah, she is totally the most popular girl in the school, probably one of the smartest too (Damn that Rachel Berry and her smartness), and has an awesome group of talented people that she can call her family now, but she has lost so much. And here she was, end of Junior year, with nothing to show for it. Losing everything has been hard, losing Finn, then Sam then Finn again, giving up the baby, giving up her body for the baby therefore losing her perfect abs, losing the competition from Prom Queen, losing regionals the first time, and recently losing nationals, brings Quinn to the conclusion that's its been a rough journey. A really rough journey.
As she turns off the car, it hits her. She had the wrong attitude towards life. Why, oh why, hadn't she seen it before? It is so clear, yet she missed it all this time. She has had a bad attitude towards her parents, her friends, Glee, school, Cheerios, and the results of it were a bunch of bad decisions. She could have avoided that fight with Santana at the start of the year, had she not told Coach about her boob job. She could have avoided the Finn drama by not giving into him and his popularity.
Then it hit her again, this was all about popularity. But, how? Popularity was a good thing, right? It kept you on top, and feared by those minions at McKinley, kept you out of gossip spread my Jewfro, it kept you the top dog. If this was all true, why was she so miserable then?
Her thoughts were interrupted by a loud knock to her window, and she whipped around to see who it was.
"Tubbers, why are sitting out here in your car?" Santana said with her hand on her hip and a glare that could burn.
"Nothing, get your ass inside before I kick it there. Oh, and what did I say would happen if you called me that again?" Quinn replied while getting out of the car and doing her best HBIC death glare at Santana. Who just smirked and gave her the finger before running inside.
"Bitch," Quinn muttered before following her in. It was going to be a long night.