a/n: originally published on ao3, september 18 2015.
For the first five days following the eradication of the Titans, Historia went about her duties as usual, though her duties themselves had strayed far from the usual. She was working closely with the Survey Corps again, permitting certain missions to allow population expansion, and denying others that aimed to go too far too soon. She was advised to stem the control of information release, with more and more texts being recovered from the times before the Titans, locked away from public eye for hundreds of years. She made speech after speech, reminding the people they still had a queen who governed and cared, despite the chaos and uncertainty that had begun taking hold.
On the sixth day, Historia felt stretched too thin. With her attention demanded nearly every waking moment, she felt a constant throbbing in her temple, and she could scarcely sleep from the palpitating of her heart. The Titans were no longer a threat to the world, and yet she was more stressed than ever.
This was supposed to be a joyous time. And so Historia decided to make it joyous.
She announced a festival to mark the week following eradication. Its purposes would be many: to raise money among the elite of Sina to support expansion efforts and begin bringing people out of the underground, to boost morale among the general population unsure of what would be coming next, and to take public attention off the queen. There would be music to focus on, and art, and hope.
Historia made one speech to open the festival, then amid a shower of colored paper and applause she disappeared into the castle.
She changed out of her gown into commoner's clothing, a simple blouse and skirt she might have worn in her days as Krista Lenz. Yet there was no mistaking her for that long-lost girl now. Historia's smiles were not as sweet as Krista's, but she held her head higher, and she felt a strength she never had before.
She owed it all to one person, and Historia sought her out now.
Slipping out of the castle was easy enough with a hooded cloak over her distinguishable blonde hair. She took a private carriage to the Sina branch of the recently-expanded Survey Corps, where a few remaining shifters were still being held and tested to check for recurrences of their abilities. With the Military Police still maintaining some measure of control over governance, Historia was finding it difficult to get the shifters released as soon as she wanted, but she had at least ensured they were kept comfortable and treated well.
Historia passed Mikasa Ackerman on her way in, who paid her no mind, not recognizing Historia with the hood pulled low over her face. She supposed Mikasa was on her way to see Eren, who was also being kept in the building. Historia had visited several times since the shifters had voluntarily subjected themselves to confinement, and Mikasa hardly left his side, which naturally led to talk. Historia wondered if they talked about her and Ymir in the same way. She found she didn't mind the idea.
A Military Policeman standing guard bowed as she approached, used to her disguise, and he opened the door for her. Inside Ymir had her back to Historia, and Hange Zoe was holding a needle to Ymir's arm, taking blood. Neither of them noticed Historia enter.
"Ymir," she said.
Ymir looked over her shoulder, and her bored expression softened when she met Historia's gaze. The familiarity of Ymir's dark eyes and playful mouth made the chaos of the new world recede. Historia sighed, feeling like she could breathe properly for the first time in days.
"Well good morning, Your Majesty," Ymir said, giving her a wink.
Historia tugged her hood closer to her face in a vain attempt to hide her blush, suddenly feeling anything but majestic.
"Your Majesty," Hange said, still focusing on Ymir's arm.
"Commander," Historia said, and cleared her throat. "I was wondering how much longer Ymir's testing will go today?"
"I'm not the commander anymore," Hange reminded her with a smile. They had been a highly effective leader for the last few years, but Hange had elected to step down after the eradication of the Titans, choosing to focus their efforts on research.
Historia knew it, but still preferred to use the term as a sign of respect to her former squad leader.
"Not long at all, though," Hange added, bandaging Ymir's arm. "Just heading out to run these vials through and see what's changed. She's all yours."
Ymir snorted at the phrasing. Hange collected the small vials and set them carefully in a side pouch of their satchel.
"Still no little monsters running loose in there?" Ymir asked, nodding to where her blood was stored away. Her tone was casual but Historia could hear the hesitation underneath. She knew how badly Ymir wanted to be free of whatever it was that made her transform, that had once kept her imprisoned for sixty years. Historia only wanted her to be free to live, as Ymir had once wanted for her.
"Not today," Hange said. "I'm trying to arrange a meeting with some of the heads of the MP soon, hopefully I can get them to take a look at my findings. Make them realize you lot aren't a threat to society anymore."
"No more than usual," Ymir said, making Hange laugh.
"Have a good one, you two," Hange said, giving Historia a cursory bow before leaving the room. When the door closed, Ymir slid off her chair and started toward Historia.
"So what brings you here today?" she asked. "Don't you have that festival thing going on?"
"That's why I'm here," Historia said. "I was hoping you'd join me."
"Hm." Ymir stopped two feet away, casting a glance around her small room, just homey enough to avoid being thought of as a cell. "That would be nice, wouldn't it? Getting out of here…"
"I'm serious," Historia said.
Ymir raised her eyebrows. She smiled, but did not look convinced. "Well, if you can manage it…"
"I can," she said. Historia reached out to take Ymir's hand and half-dragged her back toward the door. She opened it and met the guard's eyes.
"Ymir will be in my custody for the day," Historia informed him. "She will be returned after sundown."
The guard opened his mouth as if to argue, but she kept her face firm, and she could see him giving in.
"As you say, Your Majesty," he said, giving her another bow.
Historia nodded curtly and started back down the hall, Ymir following after a few stunned seconds.
"I love it when you use your queen voice," Ymir said in a low tone, taking Historia's arm and grinning.
Historia smiled at her feet, but was afraid she might stammer if she tried to speak. She had been certain for a long time of how she felt about Ymir, and she was equally certain that Ymir felt the same about her. Yet neither of them had acted upon their feelings, at least not tangibly. They had each made drastic and terrible decisions on behalf of the other, and for years that had been all they were able to do.
But the fight was over now, and with peace came the possibility that things could finally be different for them. The thought sent flutters through Historia's stomach, nervous and thrilling at once.
They took the carriage back to the city center, where celebrations were well underway. Historia focused on keeping her face hidden, and Ymir simply looked relieved to be back outside. Historia had never seen her look so happy to be around other people.
Historia slipped Ymir a few coins from her purse and they bought sweetened apples from a merchant to nibble at as they walked through the festival. Mostly Historia allowed Ymir to lead. They saw painters displaying their works, dancers performing in the streets, and countless musicians. Every now and then Ymir would whisper a comment to her, leaning in close to be heard over the crowd, and Historia would laugh and resist reaching out to keep her near.
When Historia adjusted her hood for the hundredth time, Ymir gave it a gentle tug over Historia's eyes.
"I doubt they'd recognize you anyway," Ymir said. "You're much smaller in person than you seem when you're on your balcony."
"You've seen me?" Historia said, passing over the comment about her height.
Ymir nodded, a faint smile appearing on her lips. "Hange will take us to the roof sometimes for fresh air, and we can see the castle from there. Even though you were far away, you seemed...larger than life somehow, I don't know. Like you've really grown into this."
Historia knew she was blushing, but she tilted her head up to meet Ymir's eyes anyway. Those who surrounded her daily saw her only as a queen, and those from the military still saw her as Krista. Only Ymir saw her as a complete person, and Historia felt the loneliness of her past fading away.
"I owe it all to you," Historia said.
Ymir shook her head. She touched Historia's cheek, barely grazing with her fingertips. "Nah. You always had it in you, Historia."
As light as the touch was, Historia felt her skin burning when Ymir lowered her hand.
They spent the next several hours enjoying the sights and each other's company. When pink began to tinge the sky, Historia dreaded the idea of their time in the open together coming to an end. She had not felt so relaxed in far too long, and she was not ready to send Ymir back.
Ymir was the one who finally reminded Historia of her promise to return her around sundown, and it was with heavy reluctance that they flagged down a carriage. The ride back was quiet, as they were both tired, but the air buzzed with a happy energy. There had been too many times when Historia thought she might never see Ymir again, and seeing her for hours in broad daylight had helped heal those patches of anxiety that once ate away at her.
The carriage dropped them off, and Historia stood in front of the door, suddenly unwilling to move. Ymir watched her for a moment, then gave her hand an encouraging squeeze.
"It's all right," Ymir said. "It's not like I'm not ever getting out of here again. And you can come visit like you always do."
"I know," Historia said. She didn't budge.
There was a muffled boom somewhere far behind her, sounding like it was coming from the city center. It took Historia a moment to realize what it was.
"Ymir," she said. "The roof here has a view, right?"
"A damn good one," Ymir said, nodding. "Why?" she added, though a knowing smile had already begun creeping onto her face.
"C'mon," Historia said.
They went inside and immediately went for the staircase, sneaking by Ymir's guard, who looked to be dozing against the wall. When they reached the top Ymir pushed the door open, and Historia saw she was right. The roof's view was comparable to that from the castle, providing a magnificent view of the capital. The sun was setting quickly, and there was a chill in the air now. Out in the main square of the city fireworks were being lit, causing occasional booms and flashes of brilliant light amid the growing darkness.
"Wow," Historia said, and Ymir nodded in agreement.
Even from this distance Historia could hear strains of music underneath the fireworks. Ymir hummed absentmindedly along with the song, and it gave Historia an idea.
"Dance with me?" Historia offered.
Ymir turned to her. "What?"
"You heard me," Historia said, trying to sound more confident than she felt.
"I know," Ymir said, smiling slightly. "Just wanted to hear you say it again."
Historia stepped closer, taking one of Ymir's hands and threading their fingers together. "Dance with me."
"All right," Ymir said.
Historia put her other hand on Ymir's shoulder and leaned in close, so her head was nearly resting on Ymir's chest. Ymir put her free hand on Historia's hip and they swayed gently to the music, moving across the roof slowly and together.
The tune was a bittersweet thing that fit the festival. As good as it was to have the Titans gone, the cost had been high, and there was mourning mingled with the jubilation. Historia felt the grief of the public weighing in her chest, yet she couldn't remember the last time she had smiled so much, or so easily. It was something only Ymir brought out in her. Something she craved to feel more often.
After a minute Ymir lowered her head to rest on Historia's, and she could feel Ymir's mouth curve into a smile.
"What, no fancy royal ballroom moves to teach me?" Ymir asked, teasing.
"Not tonight," she said, and pulled Ymir a little closer. Despite the growing coolness of the night, she felt as content as if she were in her own bed, warm and safe.
The music stopped, and Historia pulled back enough to look at Ymir's face. This close, she could see every freckle illuminated by the dying daylight. She thought she could look at Ymir forever, until she had each freckle memorized, and it still wouldn't be enough.
She wanted to do more than just look.
"Ymir…" Historia took a deep breath to steady herself, drawing from the courage Ymir had always given her. "I'd like to kiss you, if that's all right."
"I thought you'd never ask," Ymir said, and bent down to kiss her. It was soft, yet nearly knocked Historia off balance from surprise. Historia quickly regained her footing and wrapped her arms around Ymir's neck, rising to the tips of her toes and kissing her back with a little more force.
All thought left Historia's head, blissfully close as she was to Ymir. Somewhere back in her subconscious she knew they would have to head back downstairs soon, but the seconds slipped away, and Historia got lost in the rough feel of Ymir's dark skin under her fingertips, Ymir's lips warmed from a day in the sun, Ymir's strong hands at her waist.
Then something occurred to Historia, and she pulled back an inch.
"You were waiting for me to ask?" she said, aware of how breathless she sounded.
"Of course," Ymir replied.
Historia smiled and rose to meet her again, this time a little slower.
Even with the Titans gone, there was still much that remained uncertain about their future. Historia didn't know when Ymir and the other shifters would be released. She didn't know how steady her reign would be in the face of a rapidly-changing world. She didn't know how the public would react to a queen without heirs, a queen who would take another woman as a consort.
What she did know was that she had Ymir. She finally had Ymir, after years of missed chances and separations and longing and doubt. And for now, Historia knew that would be enough.