A/N: Another Terra-e fic, hinted BluexJomy I guess. So don't like it, leave now. But if you do read it I hope you enjoy it and apologize for the ending.

I never saw it coming.

No, that's a lie, we all did. We just never thought it would actually happen. But that's not entirely true either; really, we just never wanted it to happen. Never wanted to believe it would come to pass. That he would pass.

It was only a matter of time though, as much as I hate to say it. We all knew it, but perhaps it hurt less to think he would get better.

That's honest. But it doesn't help now.

Not being able to help, that was the worst. Or rather, not being able to help as much as I'd have liked to. Especially since I owed it to him, after what he did for me. It was my fault and I couldn't even do anything about it. That's the worst. Having to go with that knowledge. Them having every right to hate me, and not even blaming me. They did at first, but now, taking his place, they look up to me, respect me.

And that hurts too.

Even having gone through that though, I can't say I'd have been happier if he left me alone. I could never leave them now, no matter how many times the thought comes to mind, which is always less and less often. Maybe because I know there's no where I can go. Maybe it's because they need me, though I often doubt I'm much help.

This reminds me...maybe it's what he said. "In order to create a path, you must believe in yourself. You will not know if you've done good or bad until everything is over."

It didn't really make sense at first, but looking back I'm grateful for those words. He was always the one to help, even when it meant harm to himself. So selfless, noble, foolish. I know we'd all be happier with him back, despite the fact everyone's moved on in some way.

Or tried to, in my case. It's hard to forget him, to shrug it off, even though I only knew him for a brief amount of time. I'd never try to anyway. Living with the pain is better than never having met him at all.

I'm not making much sense now am I? I messed up, and I regret it. I want him back, but it's not going to happen. I've got a new family, friends as well, but it's not entirely right without him. And most people will probably say that's ridiculous, I barely knew him, I'd never even gotten a chance to really talk to him. I shouldn't miss him so much. But I do. The few times we did talk, we shared so much. Not to mention the memories he left me, they show everything about him.

And that only makes me miss him more, though I cherish being able to hear him again, no matter if it's only temporary.

Of course a few people will notice, knowing that it's not entirely healthy, but it seems as long as I'm focused when the time comes they don't mind.

Again I'm lying; some do care, but being as fond of isolation as I've become I suppose I forget...

I hear someone coming now, that'll be Leo, or Tony maybe. I need to socialize, they say, make appearances, talk to everyone.

I'm smiling now, if only half heartedly, or bitterly. It's more than welcome either way. And that's because it seems there's precious little to smile about, so to know they try so hard for me...it's touching.

Hmm...that brings a warm feeling. Funny, I haven't felt like this since, well, him.

Maybe there's hope after all.

A/N: And there it is, I've been wanting to post something for awhile now and since this was finished I figured it would work. Again, sorry about the ending, it's kinda sudden/not very good but I may fix it if I can figure out how to. I hope someone liked it, please leave a review regardless though! =3