Disclaimer: ZaGr, angst, attempted suicide and beware of the fluffeh.
Pride and Pain
(Gaz's PoV)
I'm out walking. I see Zim hunched under what sparse shelter my porch provides. He looks sick. I drop the umbrella, unlock the door and drag him inside. He's shivering so hard his teeth are audibly clacking. His eyes are wide, almost pleading. His antennae are limp and unmoving. His skin is cold and clammy and his forehead is hot enough to fry an egg. Yeah, he's definitely sick. I drag his shivering form up to my room and peel his soaking clothes off despite his weak protests. He doesn't even so much as slap my hands away.
"Jeez Zim, you really got it bad if you won't even fight." He doesn't look at me but rather tries to. He can't seem to focus on anything. "There's nothing you can do to save me. I just wanted to tell the Dib-beast that he won." I glare at him, daring him to say there's nothing I can do. I am Gaz, if I want something to happen by the gods of this pathetic dirt ball it happens.
I towel him off and help him into some of my spare clothes. He can at least focus on me again. He hasn't stopped staring at me since I put the clothes on him. I pick him up and tuck him into my bed. "Stay here Zim. I'm going to go get some food from your base." I lock the bedroom door and am on my way out the front just as Dib barrels into me. "Dib," I growl, I am not happy. "I'm sorry Gaz but Zim's not at his base and he's got to be planning something I just know it!" I glare at him with both eyes open. "I know he's not at his base you idiot. He's going to be in my room until he gets better and he said to tell you you've won. Now get out of my way." I shove him roughly and he just stares at me dumbfounded. You're joking. You've got to be." I snarl. "Then go ask him if he's joking you jerk." I'm out the door by then and slam it hard.
I find Gir outside the base playing in the mud, so predictably, with his piggies. He runs to hug me and I hit him with the umbrella. "No hug until you clean up Gir." The little robot da'aws and then goes back to playing in the mud. I let myself in the base and ask the computer what happened to Zim. It gives me a five minute run down of Zim learning that his mission was a fake and creating a super virus that only affects irkens but kills them in three days.
"How can we save him?" the computer calculates for a second and prints out several possibilities. I like two of them and discard the other ideas. The first idea is to make a virus that'll devour the first one and leave Zim unharmed. The second is to use nanites to crush the virus outright which will be very painful. The computer is kind enough to point out that it is a super virus meaning nothing organic can faze it. Nanites it is then.
With the computer's help the nanites are programmed and ready in four minutes. I take them home, fully expecting Zim to be on an autopsy table in Dad's lab but he's right where I left him. Dib's actually been keeping him company while I was away. "Alright Zim let me see your arm." His eyes go wide. "W-why?" I growl. "Because if you don't I'll make it even more painful than if you cooperate." He surrenders his left arm and I inject the pink glittery nanites. Dib looks like he's going to faint.
"All done. Dib help me strap him down." Dib looks at me like I've grown another head. "NOW!" He complies quickly, finding belts and other things to tie Zim to the bed so he won't claw his eyes out. "Why do we need to tie him down?" As if in response the screaming starts. "So he doesn't hurt himself worse than what'll happen." Dib looks at me incredulously. "Gaz, he sounds like he's going to die." I glare at him refusing to look at Zim's writhing form. "He has a 50/50 chance of surviving. If he doesn't make it I at least tried." I hand him a variety of irken foods. "Feed him some of those if he survives."
Dib nods dumbly then grabs my arm just as I'm about to leave. "Gaz, you stay with Zim. I'll make sure Dad doesn't come up here okay?" I nod. I really don't want to stay but I don't want Zim to be alone either. I sit down on the edge of the bed and hold his hand, petting it lightly.
"Hang in there Zim." I kiss his forehead as the screaming subsides into whimpers and sobs. I untie him and hold him close. He doesn't move other than nuzzling his face into the crook of my neck. I rub his back in small soothing circles. "Are you gonna be okay Zim?" He sighs softly. "Why?" I hold him back just enough to glare at him. "Because suicide is for cowards." He looks at me with puzzlement on his features. "But nobody else would've even cared." I hug him. "Exactly Zim." He wraps his arms around my shoulders and presses his lips to my cheek. I stroke his cheek and turn his head to capture his lips with mine. They say pride comes before the fall. I say it comes before the pain. Either way he doesn't have to face the world alone anymore and neither do I.
