(A/N) okay, so this is my first songfic, so tell me if you like it! The song is Good to You by Mariana's Trench. (my favorite band) So, read and review!
Alec POV
Everyone's around,
No words are coming now.
And I can't find my breath,
Can we just say the rest with no sound.
I was worried, standing in front of Magnus. His arms were crossed and he was giving me a look, waiting for me to speak.
I opened my mouth, and closed it. I wasn't sure where Magnus and I stood. We had just begun going out, but he still saw that look when Jace was around. That look I knew made him so insanely jealous. The look I shouldn't be giving. But yet, I did.
I was trying to speak, but no words came out. There was nothing I could think to say, and when I thought of something it just stayed back in my throat. Tears leaked down my cheeks as I tried to apologize.
I know this isn't enough,
And I still don't measure up.
I know I'm not prepared,
Sorry is never there when you need it.
"Magnus. I'm sorry. You know I don't love him that way. But I still can't help thinking of him as my first crush. I never loved him that way. I saw him as a distraction. Something to keep me in my safe zone, so I'd never have to take a risk.
"And now that I've taken the risk I think that it was good I was hiding, so I could take the risk with you. But I know it's time to stop hiding. And I'm slowly coming out as myself. But, please Magnus, give me time.
And I do want you to know,
I'll hold you up above everyone.
And I do want you to know,
I think you'd be good to me,
And I'd be so good to you,
I would.
He looked at me with his shining cat-like eyes, knowing he had to forgive me. I didn't mean to like Jace. But I do wish to love Magnus. And I did love him.
"Magnus, you're the person I want to take with me, wherever I go. You're the person I want to be with when I'm sad. In fact, that's all I can think about whenever you're not near me. It's how much you mean o me and how much I wish you were there with me. Always.
Magnus POV
I thought I saw the signs,
Somewhere between the lines.
But maybe it's me,
Maybe I only see what I want.
I stared at Alec.
"Alexander, when I first saw you, you were so close to Jace I thought you were on the brink of grabbing him and making out with him against a wall! But when you looked at me, you side-stepped him, showing me that I might have a chance.
"Then Clary came sauntering in behind you, and I knew from the way she looked at Jace that she was in love. You gave Jace that same look all night, making me think I might have imagined whatever had happened between us when you walked through that door.
"You've never stopped giving him that look." My eyes were shining, tears threatening to pour out of my eyes for the first time in centuries. I loved Alec. And I didn't want to let him go. But if he was in love with someone else, then I had to let it be.
I still have your letter,
Just got caught between someone I just invented,
Who I really am
And who I've become.
"Remember that letter you sent? The one explaining that you wanted to see me? But you said we'd have to do it late at night because you still haven't admitted to your parents that you're gay. Gosh, I'd hate to be there for her reaction.
"Anyway, I kept it. It was the first sign that I might be able to be with you. But this wasn't me. I've been chasing after you because I love you, Alexander Lightwood. But have you ever heard the expression 'if you love it, let it go, and if it comes back it's yours. But if it doesn't it was never yours to begin with'
"Alexander, it's time for a break. I need to know that you're mine before I try to cage you. You can't lock up a dog that isn't yours the same way you can't love someone freely that's not in love with you back. I'll miss you."
I turned around and was about to walk away when Alec grabbed my shoulder turning me around.
Alec POV
And I do, want you to know
I'll hold you up above everyone.
And I do want you to know;
I think you'd be good to me,
And I'd be so good to you
My hand was resting on Magnus's shoulder, but I couldn't say anything. I had looked at Jace that way. And I knew it. I was ashamed of it. But I had never loved anyone the way I had loved Magnus.
"Magnus, I love you. I don't want you to leave. I couldn't live if you did." Tears spilled out of my eyes and streaked down my cheeks, splashing onto the ground below.
"I love you like I've loved no one else. I don't want you to stay. I need you to stay. When I'm wounded I don't want runes from Jace. I want spells from you. When I'm alone I don't want Jace to come talk to me. I want you to come amaze me with your amazing beauty, your way with words, the way you make me feel.
"I only get that feeling with you. No one else."
Magnus POV
And I do, want you to know
I'll hold you up above everyone.
And I do want you to know;
I think you'd be good to me,
And I'd be so good to you.
His hand tightened on my shoulder and he leaned in to kiss me. It wasn't a hungry kiss. It was the kind of kiss that made you want to melt to the ground, the kind that made you forget everything you had ever been taught.
It was the kind of kiss that made you know someone was telling the truth. That they loved you. And no one else.
"I love you" I murmured on his mouth and we stayed like that. At that moment I knew I had him. He loved me. He might have a little crush on his step-brother whose name I couldn't think of at the moment, but he was mine. And I was his. And it would stay like that forevermore.