Bounty Hunting
Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel or Sunbow Entertainment. I own Farrah/Persiana and Leon/Crisis. Red Witch owns the Misfits!
One Shot
Carol Danvers was the blonde teen Avenger Miss Marvel. She was super strong and super tough, but, she was also in love with one of her West Coast Avengers teammates; the boy Leon Maxwell, the powerhouse precog Crisis. Leon was dating Farrah Willows, the white-furred cat-girl Persiana, whom the two had an intense rivalry. Both girls liked Leon, but Leon made it proven that he is dating Farrah and that was all there was to it. Though he thought Carol was an attractive girl, he just did not see her in a relationship with him. Of course, this did not detract Carol from getting what she wanted. She was going to belong to Leon, and no were-cat was going to get in the way of that.
Presently, she was looking on-line for another ploy to get Persiana out of the way. Then, she happened upon an ad,
Monster Hunter. Looking to hunt the most dangerous of monsters. Is not cheap, but will get the job done. Contact Elsa Bloodstone.
A sly smile came across the Air Force brat as she began typing…
A little later…
Leon and Farrah were lounging in another room and the red-eyed teen was busy petting his girlfriend. Farrah loved the attention and affectionately purred back,
"I love you, Leon."
Crisis smiled and kissed his girlfriend on the lips,
"I love you too, Farrah."
Natasha Romanoff, the teen heroine Black Widow, peered around the corner and snickered to herself. She waited until the two had shared a deepened kiss when she casually walked in,
"How's the happy couple doing?!"
The two pulled away, and Farrah glared menacingly at her spying teammate,
"What are you doing here?"
Natasha gave a smart answer,
"I live here too, you know. Seriously, Farrah, have you ever stopped to control your hormones for a second?"
Persiana hissed,
"I like the attention Leon gives me. Besides, one can say you have the same problem concerning a certain archer."
Natasha stiffened for a moment, knowing that she had been caught in a corner. Leon shook his head,
"You shouldn't get her angry, Nat. Redwing can tell you that."
The espionage expert chuckled,
"All right, but, next time, it could be one of the adults."
Just then, there was a knock at the door. Natasha walked over, and answered it.
The door opened and a large, curvy teen girl with red hair and a red-jeweled necklace was standing in the doorway. She was dressed like an adventurer, and she had a sword in one hand and a shotgun in the other. The teen spoke in a British accent,
"Oi! Me name is Elsa Bloodstone, as in the family of monster hunters. Is this where the monster is?"
Carol walked in,
"Wow, that was fast. Yes, the monster I want you to get rid of is right there!"
She pointed to Persiana and the white-haired cat-girl hissed,
"Barbie! What is going on here?!"
Elsa charged in,
"DIE, MONSTER!"
She steamrolled past Natasha and made a dash for Farrah. Farrah ran off on all fours, with the monster hunter chasing her. The red-head screamed,
"COME BACK HERE AND DIE, YOU BLOODY MONSTER!"
Leon glared at Carol,
"What did you do this time?"
Carol shrugged,
"Hey, how was I supposed to know this was going to happen? Besides, she thinks Farrah is a monster, which is kind of true."
Crisis shook his head,
"And you thought contracting a psychotic monster hunter was a good idea?"
Farrah ducked a sword strike and taunted,
"Hah! If Barbie paid you, you should be giving her a refund for all the misses you're taking."
Elsa taunted,
"Eat lead, monster!"
A shotgun blast was fired, perforating a wall. Leon folded his arms,
"This would not happen to have anything to do with you trying to win me over, would it?"
Carol looked offended,
"Excuse me? Do I look like I would do someone that would do that?"
Elsa shouted,
"Stand still so I can kill ya and get paid!"
Leon continued to fold his arms and stare at Miss Marvel,
"Well?"
Carol shook her head,
"I'm going to help Falcon with something now."
She then walked over and Leon shook his head,
"This can't get any worse."
Just then, five more shotgun shots were fired and then there was an explosion. Elsa screamed,
"Bloody hell! Me gun jammed!"
Farrah then ran behind Leon and hid as best she could,
"Leon, that crazy bitch is trying to kill me!"
Elsa then came in the room with her sword and looked at the super strong hero,
"Now, listen here; I'm getting paid to kill that thing that's crawling around, and you aren't going to get in me way. I'll have you know I killed a monster with a spoon once."
Leon looked at her sternly,
"Back off, lady. Now."
Elsa snarled,
"Now, you bloody listen to me! I'm Elsa Bloodstone, from the famous Bloodstone family of monster hunters. No one tells me what to do when it comes to hunting monsters!"
Then, there was a booming voice,
"EEELLLSSSSAAA!"
Elsa swallowed nervously,
"Oh, bugger. It's me old man."
A tall, blonde man wearing a similar red pendant, hefting a large elephant gun on his shoulders, stormed in, glaring daggers at Elsa,
"What did I tell you about running off with my sword?"
Carol asked,
"Who are you?"
The man said,
"My name is Ulysses Bloodstone, and I do apologize for any sort of misunderstanding."
Farrah snapped,
"Misunderstanding! That psycho bitch just tried to perforate me!"
The elder bloodstone sighed,
"You must forgive my daughter's impatient attitude. Ever since she learned to kill a monster with a spoon, she has been quite eager to get a contract."
Leon was about to ask how that was possible when Elsa pouted,
"But, Daddy-."
Ulysses shook his head,
"Enough! You are coming back with me and you will be punished for disobeying me! No contracts for you for a month, and that's just for starters!"
Elsa gasped,
"But, but that's so unfair!"
As the teens watched the two monster hunters leave, Leon shook his head,
"I'm glad that's settled. Now, all we have to do is clean this place up before the adults find out."
No sooner was that said than a woman's feminine roar was heard,
"WHY IS THERE BUCKSHOT IN OUR WALLS?! RHODY, DID YOU CHASE AFTER THE FLY AGAIN?!"
Carol quickly said,
"Is it all right if we attribute this to the fly incident so that I can get out of being punished?"
Farrah rolled her eyes,
"Barbie not wanting to face punishment? Wow, that's a first."
The red-eyed teen shook his head,
"We have to tell them. I have a feeling they're going to find out anyway about the Bloodstones sooner or later."
Then, Falcon's voice could be heard,
"SOMEONE, HELP ME!"
Elsa was busy chasing him, with little hearts floating around her,
"Come back you sexy man you!"
Ulysses was right behind them,
"Elsa, get back here! This is no way a woman should act!"
Monica Rambeau, the heroine Pulsar, chased after them,
"Did you have something to do with destroying this house? Did you?"
Farrah could not help but quip,
"I'd say sooner."
Leon groaned in his head; it was not fun being a precog…
End of One Shot