:Disclamer: I don't own the joker, suicide squad, Hellraiser or anything DC related in this story. I don't know Muse. I only own Alice, Myra and the plot. I make no profit out of this. It's purely fiction.
Title: Crazy For A Joke
Chapter 1: The Bank
It was a bright sunny day in Gothem City where we find Alice and Myra Spencer at their usual spot, the bank. Why? They do it to be human because humans go to the bank. On this particular day, which was a Wednesday by the way, nobody knew that it would be the day picked by the most dangerous man currently alive. Alice and Myra stood in line for a half an hour to get $20 to go see a movie they have been waiting to see for 12 years and nothing will stand in their way from seeing this movie. Not even hell.
Alice, who was wearing her black Muse t-shirt, red pants with 15 random key chains hanging off the belt loops, a black and white striped vest that ended around the hips, rainbow socks and ugly brown crock sandals. Her hair was half blue half pink, like a fucked up Cruella De Vile style. She looked at her sister jumping up and down."Oh my god! I can't wait to see Deadpool!" Alice expressed excitedly. She looked like she was about to kill someone because of how happy she was. Or she had just consumed an entire box of Dunkin Donuts. Either way, the inhabitants of the bank were screwed.
Myra who had more of a adult look of black feminine jeans, plain white long sleeved shirt, neon green socks and a nice pair of purple klogs with black specks for shoes. Her hair was a deep dark shade of green that was done in a nice simple fish tail braid. She rolled her eyes at her sister. "Calm yo tits! Me too," Myra said with haste in her demeanor. Myra was determined to see this fucking movie once and for all. Everyone else could go to hell and meet her dad.
"What's wrong?" Alice asked her sister.
"We're gonna be..."and before Myra could finish her sentence, the man of Alice's dreams glided through the door on a skateboard. A gun was in each of his hands and the look in his eyes said he was going to shoot someone no matter what.
Almost everyone went dead silent when he spoke. "Everyone on the floor, this is a night you are going to remember. Put all your money in the bags and maybe no one gets hurt." Right about then some of his lackeys dressed up in what looked to be like hobo's clothing and clown masks entered the bank with guns and empty brown sacks in their hands.
Everyone started to panic and did what the man said. Alice looked over and she was, shall we say, struck with love. The man then walked over to her now staring face to face with her. She thought he was the 'hottest' guy she's seen next to Matthew Bellamy. That was an epic comparison.
He looked a little like her ex. He looked kinda like he was on the verge of death. His dark eyes, green hair, wicked silver smile, red lips, chalk white skin and tattoos made him look more like an artistic corpse. Upon his shoulders he a wore purple jacket. Around his hips black pants sat. Gracing his feet were a pair of black shiny shoes that looked like they belonged to a lawyer who paid a fuck ton of money for them. What was it she was drawn to? Clearly she has never met this man. Where did he get such fashion sense?
"Get on the ground," the man told Alice. His voice held confusion because she was not doing as he said. That and he was contemplating the hearts floating around her head. And not the bloody beating kind, actual fluffy animated hearts from cartoons.
"Why?" She asked simply.
Myra looked at the both of them and sighed. "Excuse me.. Alice, you know I've done my waiting... 12 years of it of what feels like possibly in Azkaban. I want to see Deadpool if it's the last thing aaaannnnnd you're not even listening to me," she growled with frustration. What was even a little more frustrating nobody was paying attention to her and she clearly wasn't following some weirdo with green hair's orders. She wasn't particularly happy that his hair was green as well.
The both of them continued to ignore Myra. "Why aren't you on the ground?" The man asked Alice. This time he was waving the gun around in a "really?" expressive fashion.
Alice sighed as she looked him in the eyes. "I'm not getting on the ground because for one...I'll get my outfit dirty and for two...well...I haven't thought about two but when I do, I'll let you know," Alice explained. The way she said it was almost as if it was a true to god honest mistake that she hadn't thought that far.
Before the man could respond Alice quickly started up again. She tends to do that. His outfit and makeup finally made sense to her."You're The Joker huh?" She asked.
"How did you..." He was interrupted.
"Your hair. It's a familiar look. A look in your eyes. Your lips..." Alice trailed off. She was slowly leaning in closer to get a good look at those lips. And boy did she want to get some of that lipstick.
The tapping of Myra's right foot could be heard if anybody was paying attention to her. Alas, nobody really was. And the guy that even came near here with a gun and sack of money ended up under her shoe barely gasping for air as she had kicked him in the lungs. "Alice...Don't make me hurt you." Myra grew inpatient.
Alice looked at her sister, " You got the money?"
The Joker grew irritated "Listen to me!" He yelled at the Spencer's. This time he took note of the other one.
Alice jumped then smiled. She loved it when she knew a hot man told her what to do. She used to do that with her ex by the same name. Many of Jokers had come and gone but this one was by far one of the cute ones in her opinion. At least he didn't have no fucking scars…yet.
Meanwhile, The Joker's minions gathered up all the money in the bank, sans the one under Myra's foot, and left their boss to get caught. The sound of the sirens grew louder as the police were on their way. The Joker heard the sound and headed out the door. He was stopped by Alice who stood in his way like a damn old lady waiting to get run over on the sidewalk.
"Wait! Here's my number." She handed him a piece of paper.
He took it, smiled then left considering he was in no hurry to meet the police. Alice felt like she was on cloud 9. Myra grabbed her sister and dragged her from the bank to the movie theater the whole way by her ear. She had finally gotten some money thanks to the jerk that pointed his gun at her and decided he needed new lungs anyway. There they went to see ending half of Deadpool. Let's just say Myra died Alice's hair yellow for missing the first half.