characters: Jocelyn (farmer) x Muffy.
rating: G.
genre: utterly silly humor. femmeslash.
fandom: Harvest Moon: DS
words: 832.

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Jocelyn had found herself in quite a compromising position; really, it was a terribly indelicate thing to be one so vehemently opposed to the idea of true love only to be caught floating in a sea of idyllic romance, fraught with flowers, starry eyes, and pitifully saccharine hand-holding with the pretty barmaid, inebriated in something far more potent than any alcohol, and giddy as a schoolgirl every time Muffy smiled at her.

But there she was, drifting past the days with the hazy smile of someone in love, breezing through her daily chores, raiding the mines for every piece of jewelry she could wring from the dirt to present the gifts to the target of her light-headed affections, whisking the girl away from the bar on impromptu yet inexplicably romantic dates, and finally, becoming so undeniably attached (so much that the townspeople became so very sick of them), that Jocelyn proposed, they married and moved in together, and the rest of the world was spared their delirious, vertiginous adoration for one other.

It was exactly two seasons after Muffy became a permanent installment in her home, and this she knew because Jocelyn had every intention of celebrating it as though the day was their anniversary, which it most certainly was not, when something decidedly interesting would occur: Jocelyn would come home with an almost ridiculously extravagant bouquet and a stupid smile on her face, only to find the door to the washroom open and Muffy inside, obviously in quite a state, as she was sprawled across the toilet and retching in between small sniffles.

The first emotion to strike her was a deep-seated and instantaneous panic, after which her immediate thought was, "Oh my God, my wife is going to die", which was perhaps a little melodramatic, but that was the way it went, and the bouquet and smile were both dropped to the floor as Jocelyn ran into the bathroom and behind Muffy, instinctively reaching down to pull her hair back. It may not have been the most effective gesture, but at the time, it had briefly occurred to her that if she were the one vomiting, she might appreciate it if someone were to do the same for her, and so that was what she did for Muffy.

"Are you okay?!" She attempted to peek very anxiously into the other girl's face, but this was made quite a difficult accomplishment as Muffy was not facing her, and so Jocelyn was only really able to peek anxiously into the back of her blonde head instead.

Muffy finally stopped heaving long enough to respond to her poor, frightened wife, and said in a particularly delicate voice, "I don't know what's wrong with me... I've been nauseous all morning!"

And thus did it occur to Jocelyn that it may be a good idea to take her to see Doctor Hardy.

With her own assistance, Muffy was led into the living room (though there wasn't much distinguishing it from the bedroom except that the television was between the bed and the kitchen), and she was dressed in a long t-shirt, as Jocelyn was not entirely sure she liked the idea of the Doctor seeing her better half in any state of undress, and as soon as this was done, she hauled Muffy into her arms and immediately set off for the good doctor's office.

It was a few yards later that Jocelyn would decide that carrying Muffy herself was a terrible idea, but she did not think it would be at all civil to stop then, and so she forced herself to continue all the way to Hardy's home and inside it.

"What seems to be the trouble?" he questioned immediately, peering up at the strange pair from his desk. Jocelyn was tempted to tell him that her arms were about to fall off, but she felt that Muffy had precedence over her limbs, and so the two began a vague and rather unhelpful explanation of what had happened.

Both women found it particularly unsettling to discover that the doctor's eyes were slowly widening as they spoke until finally, both petered out and stared at him in utter confusion.

"Muffy, there's nothing wrong with you. I believe you're pregnant."

"Haha! ... What?"

Jocelyn's first instinct was to figure out the mechanics of that and how on the Harvest Goddess' bloody earth it was possible.

Muffy's first instinct was to crush Jocelyn's windpipe with ecstatic hands and an even more ecstatic scream of glee. "I'm going to have a baby?!"

"She's going to have a baby?"

And so both girls were sent home, one extremely baffled, the other filled with explosive joy. The journey to the farm consisted of ideas for names, musings on its gender, endless thanks to the Harvest Goddess for this miracle,

and Jocelyn simply wondered if Muffy would get really mad if she tried to name the baby Jesus.