A Last Chance for Everything

Dedicated to the members of the SH Het community at LJ.

Facing a dying light at the center of the room, his back was turned to her. From the distance she stood she could see his shoulders rise and fall just slightly with every breath. There were splashes of dark crimson blood in his hair, some of it fresh, some of it blackened and clumping thick strands of his long, dirty hair together.

"So sad... he's always so sad..."

Her body still ached, even as she stepped toward him, questioning in the back of her mind if this had been a mistake-- abandoning Henry to try and talk sense into the madman herself. What exactly was she going to prove? That she cared? That 'love' conquered all? No, she wasn't that naive. If anything, 'love' never did a damn good thing in her life time. But it was his loneliness that resonated with her own like a kindred note in some lost song that she had to... had to complete in some way. All of the reasoning she'd played through in her mind whilst walking up to this final destination had reminded her that beneath all of the bruises and lapses into the restless ghost's memories, Eileen Galvin was still in her right mind. And it was in her mind that she resigned to save him, and save Henry. Even if it meant he could kill her at any minute.

"Call it selfish, but I'm not even very afraid of that. What do I have to lose? An empty life with no family left, friends who come and go, never remembering the way you gave a damn... gray days, every day, study, read, read about dead things, dead people, dead cultures, dead languages..." Eileen mused, stepping forward still, unwavering in her determination to reach him.

Upward her slender hand moved, only hesitating at that last moment, her hands beginning to shake ever so slightly. He was just inches from her fingertips. She could almost feel the rough fibers of his coat, and still, she wondered if he was too lost in his own thoughts to even notice she was there. Swallowing nervously, fighting back the anxious pounding in her heart and twisting in her gut. She placed her hand gently on his shoulder and said, her voice giving way to fear and coming out just barely above a choked whisper, "...Walter?"

Eileen could feel the way his body jolted slightly, but still he turned toward her slowly, looking down with a hollow expression. She could tell that he was just as surprised as she was that she came on her own, reached out to him, touched him even. No one had ever sought him with any goals other than to hurt him... did she mean to hurt him too? "No", he reasoned, "Miss Galvin has never hurt me... Miss Galvin has only ever made me happy..."

Thinking about the light she brought to his dim life while gazing upon her bruised, broken body, all his doing, made him feel sick with guilt. It wasn't often he felt remorse or hindsight on any of his actions. Those children came to mind... and now she evoked the same reaction when he recalled that horrific moment that sealed her fate to his world, and had slowly begun to derail his own carefully formed plans by way of his inner conflict. It was a long, wordless moment in which they simply stood there, just exchanging gazes, carefully awaiting what the other would do next. Eileen was tense-- would he strike her down like an angry god? Would he even speak? Walter was too busy questioning whether his possession of her body through arcane means had brought her to this place... the last he knew of his attempt to control her was that Henry Townshend had thwarted his power with a Holy Candle. Even now, he recognized that her alabaster skin was no longer covered in such deep, dark bruises and slithering, inhuman blood.

Eileen was probing her mind for the right words to say-- what exactly does one say to a deranged man, a killer who nearly took her life and trapped her in a nightmare? She knew "I'm sorry for everything that's happened to you," was far from enough. She knew telling him, "Please, just stop this!" was a waste of breath. How long had he been staring now? Unmoving, unwavering, probably waiting to know why she had come to him.

"Walter... everything's going to be alright now." Eileen spoke, "I'm here for you."

He watched her fixedly for a long time before replying calmly, "Why?"

'Why' was a damn good question, Eileen knew. But she already had an answer for that-- something she felt. Something she hadn't quite been able to put into words yet. Now all she could do was try her best, "I don't want you to be alone anymore."

Walter quietly looked over at the spinning, spiked machine that turned ceaselessly in the pool of blood. Eileen looked over, no longer finding much shock in the things she came across in his world. The real shocker was how little fear she truly felt... maybe collecting all those H.R. Giger prints had warped her mind a little, she thought with slight sardonic amusement.

A low groan came from the other side of the room. She looked over, a sense of worry and concern coming over her as she saw a chained creature, the size of ten men, tied painfully with bloody flesh cords. It gave a quiet howl of agony, going a little quiet as it realized her green eyes were on it. Slowly, it began to twist and lower its head quietly, as if falling into a light sleep. Eileen couldn't help but feel repulsed by the creature's rotting white flesh and it's mutilated body... yet like Walter, she felt a great deal of pain emanating from within it.

"What is it you want? Do you truly think your life is so worthless, to throw it away like this?" Walter's voice came. Eileen turned to him, glaring as he spoke, "I thought you were more grateful than that."

"What do you know about my life?" Eileen couldn't hold it back-- it was like a slap to the face to be accused of being ungrateful for her life. Going through this ordeal had only strengthened the way she cherished fond memories of her family and the little mundane things in life that had brought her joy. No, never had she once felt ungrateful, like it had been in vain, "I'm not here to throw it all away."

She moved toward him, braver now, "I'm here because... if I could make you happy, just one more time, you'll understand that," she looked around at the derelict world around them, "...maybe this isn't it. Maybe there's someone else who could give you the care you've been looking for. Maybe there's someone else who could love you... and stay with you."

Walter looked down at her with what she could only hope was interest-- she really couldn't tell. There was little in his hazel green eyes implicative of any emotion, really.

"I'm not here to throw my life away. I'm here to give my life to you, if that's what it'll take to stop this." Eileen's bravery was wavering as she spoke, as she knew on the inside that if he agreed to take her in exchange for Henry's life, she could never possibly leave this nightmare... and god knows what he would try to do to her. Nevertheless, her decision was fixed. If he wanted a martyr, he could have a martyr. If he wanted a woman, he could have a woman. If he wanted a mother, she would be his mother.

"What do you want, Walter?" She stood before him now, unaware that he was absolutely entranced by both her courage and foolishness. Never had he been so seduced by such a pure hearted thing he'd been taught to view as a succubus-- something to tempt him away from god. Away from Mother.

She could feel the familiar sting of tears, and she fought them back, telling herself over and over not to waver and let him win. She wouldn't let fear win. But all of his pain, all of her loneliness, both seemed to clutter up within and make her choke and slowly break, "You don't have to be alone anymore..."

"You have me. You always have." Her smile, though quivering, was as honest as his desire to find companionship in mother. It was that same pure smile he remembered on the face of the only innocent human being he had ever met, that day in the subway nearly twenty years ago. Such a thoughtful girl, who only wanted to make him happy, offering up her most valued little doll to keep him warm, keep him company... and indeed, he kept it all those years, finding solace in the small shred of that little girl's love. Up until he had sought to abandon that final chain to his own humanity and push that girl... this woman from his heart. Such a small, simple thing had earned her the deepest place in his heart... she was so very special he couldn't even finish the sacrifice of the 20th Sacrament, and there she stood before him, once more offering up the most important thing to him; her very life.

"Just please, don't hurt anyone anymore, Walter..." Eileen pleaded softly, "You don't have to."

Something was familiar about this-- the way they stood, the way he towered over her, looking down into pleading green eyes. So very, very green... for not even a second, he could recall a blurred image in his mind of a woman and a man, standing in the shadows, not unlike the way he and Eileen did at that very moment. The woman had such beautiful green eyes... that was it, he thought... that was why he could never forget her eyes... they were just like...

"Walter?" Eileen was beginning to feel the sting of silent rejection. Had she really come all this way in vain? For a moment the word 'unrequited' crossed her mind-- unrequited what, exactly? She reasoned. "Maybe I wanted someone to love me, too." Were the words formed within.

"I don't have to hurt anyone... I don't have to take another life... you're offering to stay here with me?" He asked.

Eileen was all at once relieved to hear him speaking again, to know her words just didn't go over his head, or were lost on some kind of skepticism, "Yes, I want to stay with you, here, forever."

"Forever...?"

The brunette woman nodded. She glanced over her shoulder as the pale beast nearby made a sound akin to a purr, or a low, infantile gurgle. It sounded as though it were having a pleasant dream. She smiled warmly, being reminded of a small child, and said quietly, "He's having a good dream?"

Walter looked past her, at the slumbering creature. It was his creation, his manifestation, he knew very well what it truly meant. But he also realized that she was looking at it with the gentle eyes of a kind mother...

"Yes. We do not have pleasant dreams very often."

"What's he dreaming about?" Eileen asked.

"Mother."

She turned back to him, smiling softly. He just gazed back down, unsure of what to do or say. Miss Dahlia had always told him that the females of the world, those not chosen for paradise by god were succubae, malicious temptresses, and deceivers who played on the weaknesses of the heart. But it had been long since he cast aside the religion's teachings, even using the very priests who raised him as sacrifices in his ritual. Slowly, he brought his hand up to touch her soft skin. Her bravery was astounding-- despite the last time he laid his hands on her, she didn't even flinch or close her eyes. She just bravely looked back into his eyes, wincing only when his fingers brushed over the bruises he had left on her cheekbone by their last encounter.

"I really hurt you. How could you even care about me when I've hurt you so much?"

In all honesty, Eileen wasn't sure what to say. It was wrong on all sorts of levels, the way she had even considered reaching out to him after the way he hurt her. It was foolish and naive to simply say she wanted to give him love. She hardly knew him. It was obvious that she cared, though. It was obvious that sympathy was so great in her it became a flaw. She knew very well why-- the world had wronged him so horribly, and there had been no one to help him, to protect him, to love him. It wasn't right. No one should have to endure that...

"How could you even trust me? What if I were to kill you, still?"

"There's a last chance for everything, then," Eileen spoke, moving closer.

As if pulled into a slow, wonderful tar pit trap, he couldn't keep from leaning closer, stroking her mahogany brown tresses that felt like silk on his finger tips. He couldn't stop watching every slight movement of her lips, masked by shimmering violet lipstick. How would it feel against his lips? He had never kissed anyone before, even the way she was putting her arms around him slowly was so foreign to him, he was unsure what to make of it. But he knew it was right-- after all, this was what humans did when they wanted each other; he had seen them hold each other. He had seen couples in the park, smiling and laughing together, as if the world didn't exist outside of what little they cared to perceive.

There was little he cared to think about. He wondered if the way she made him feel put his worlds, crafted of his emotions and memories into some strange, collapsing turmoil. His heart was racing, almost as if he were in fear. But it was a warm excitement, like when he looked up at the light above them, and knew Mother was near.

"A last chance, then... I suppose I should take it..." He spoke softly. He could feel her breath on his lips. Sweet, almost like some kind of curious candy he seemed to crave just from the scent. Her head tilted slightly, eyes slipping shut, he could feel the soft skin of her nose against his stubbly, coarse cheek, her lips then brushed against his own. He didn't shut his eyes-- he wanted to see her, still, wanted to know what was making this amazing emotion. Her lips moved gently, despite his own remaining still. After a moment, he caught on, imitating her motions, and pulling her slender body closer to his own.

Pulling away slowly, she opened her eyes, feeling dizzy with a mix of anxiety and a kind of warmth she hadn't felt in years. She couldn't deny the amorous emotions he conjured within her.

"Nothing's going to get in my way." He said calmly, catching her off guard.

All at once his fingers were around her slender neck. Eileen's eyes widened in fear and confusion as he lifted her easily with one arm, smiling up at her, "I never thought I would want to feel this way. I wonder if this is what they call 'love'? I do want happiness. I want your happiness. I want you to be with me and make me feel this way forever, Eileen."

Eileen coughed, struggling against his grip as he spoke, "You've always made me so very happy."

"So I won't kill you. I can't kill you. I already tried, and I couldn't. Because I want you too badly. So I'll have you."

His eyes moved toward the spinning machine in the pool of blood. Eileen realized then what he intended to do. She began to struggle even more, but with a broken body and only one good arm, her war was a futile, losing battle. It pained her even more, still, for the strangest reason, to hear the infantile creature stirring painfully from its sleep and beginning to cry out. It was almost as if it were protesting the long haired man's sudden violence.

"In a human body, you will die here. So I must separate from the flesh she who is the Mother Reborn. You will just go to sleep. Do not worry. Your beautiful body shall remain intact. The Final Sign, the Reciever of Wisdom will die the death that was intended for you." Walter was sounding more and more deranged as he went on, smiling widely, almost laughing as he spoke, "Little Walter and I will be with Mother at last, and I'll be with you, my Eileen. We'll be so very happy, finally... forever..."

Perhaps it was the lack of oxygen... perhaps it was something else... nonetheless, her vision was fading rapidly, and her body began to go numb. She could only glance down slightly to see that he was lowering her body to the ground. She then stood, body tall and stiff, and it began to walk of it's own accord. She couldn't move her head to look back at him. She only looked ahead, seeing a stairway nearby, and she would take that stairway onto a platform where she would await her final descent into the machine that would rip her body apart.

He wasn't going to kill her. He couldn't kill her. He had already tried.