Leo wandered downstairs and into the kitchen his mind heavy with the dreams that had consumed him over the course of the night. As he walked into the open room, he saw there was a note on the fridge. It was from their parents he knew before reading it. Taking down he did a once over just to see the excuse this time.
Sorry, but something came up suddenly. Me and your
Father will be gone until 7 tonight. I hope you can make
Dinner yourselves. Please don't go anywhere without asking
Your brother, Damien.
Love,
Mom
Though he wondered what they were doing he didn't spend much time on the thought. It was quickly replaced by the ever demanding growl of his stomach. What to eat, what to eat. he said to himself as he searched the fridge for his breakfast.
He decided to wait to see what Damien was having and to con him into making an extra serving of said food. The perfect plan! Sitting down on the couch in the living room, he briefly shut his eyes. He hadn't gotten a good night's sleep…for obvious reasons. Bleh. Everything was going to be fine. That was the thought he held fast to as his world seemed to shift around him. Things would go back to the way they were soon. Of course he had no way in knowing what would happen.
Damien stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel. That was weird this morning, he thought. At the time it hadn't seemed that way, but the more he put reasoning to it he realized something had to be wrong with his brother. Maybe there was something on his mind that was weighing him down.
Well if he wanted to tell Damien he would have right? No need to push things. In truth, he wouldn't know what to do to help Leo. Walking out of the bathroom he straightened his shirt. Things will happen in their own time. That's how it's always been.
Him and his brother use to be really close. They shared everything, and rarely ever fought. Then when he was about 11 they grew distant. Leo had to have been only 13 or 14 years old. Still, he didn't know what brought it about. Since then, their interests grew further and further apart. Until eventually they were so different, and they never shared their problems anymore. The last bridge of close communication broke.
Now all Leo did was tease him, and play the older brother, and not the friend. But it's been like that for years now, so it's no big deal. Really it'd probably freak Damien out if Leo suddenly started gushing all his feelings and problems to him again. They're older now. It's normal to be distant now. It's the way everything works against time.
Stumbling into the kitchen he looked in the living room and saw his brother laying there, almost asleep again. So persistent was the thought of something wrong. Damien was curious now. What could be getting Leo down. As far as he knew, his brother was invincible and had never lost a fight. That's probably why Damien didn't fight with Leo when they were little. He knew he'd lose the battle.
"Leo, what do you want for breakfast?" He said through the doorway opening the curtain in the kitchen and letting light fill the room. Leaving nothing in the dark.
"You." Leo said under his breath answering Damien's innocent question. Though he knew that his request hadn't been heard.
"What was that?" He called back into the room. If only Damien knew what Leo was always hungry for. The thought of fulfilling that constant ach made him shamefully yearn for his brother even more.
"I said, I'll have what your having." He answered getting up. Stretching one last time he went into the kitchen to eat his breakfast and think about something he can't have.
"Where's mom and dad?" Damien asked grabbing a box of pancake batter. Hm, blueberry pancakes. Interesting. His mind didn't linger on the pancakes for long. Damien's hair was streaming with drops of water. He must have just gotten out of the shower. For a moment Leo was distracted at the thought of Damien taking a steamy shower. The water pouring down against his delicate body. Then Leo snapped back to reality so quickly it took him a moment to gather himself.
"Something came up and they're gone for the day, again. They left a note." He pulled it off the fridge and handed it to his younger brother. The sunlight that had intruded the quiet room hurt his eyes. Taking a seat at the table he waited for his breakfast. "Hey Damien. You feel like making lots of pancakes? Enough to go around?" His voice was a little sing-song, but inside the turmoil raged on.
"Okay, fine. If mom and dad is gone then can I go to Catherin's house after breakfast?" He asked flipping the first pancake over. Leo was annoyed. He didn't like Catherin. For reasons that are all to apparent to Leo. He thought about it for a minute. Then just smirked.
"No. You can't go." He said leaning his head against the table. Thinking vaguely of the Evil Catherin. "There's…um, stuff to do around the house. Yeah." He lied.
"They said I could go somewhere if I asked you!" Damien argued, turning around, but immediately saw the flaw in his defense. The fact was, he had asked. Leo had just declined. "It's not fair, just 'cause you don't like her I can't go. You're so mean at times." Damien mumbled to himself completely unknowing of the reasons behind the answer.
"Yup, so deal with it." He said, drawing a picture on a napkin with a spare pen. It was of Catherin breathing fire, with a lizards tail. It might have been funny to others, except it was in such fine detail that people would just take it seriously. Which, to Leo, only made it funnier.
"I swear, you're like a child with his toy sometimes." Damien said, setting the plate of pancakes on the table. Toy? Now there's an intriguing idea.
Damien couldn't understand what was going through his brother's mind. Why didn't he like Catherin anyway? She was really nice, and he might be in love with her. Why couldn't Leo see that this was important to him.
As he set the next plate, he saw the latest picture of his beloved. Hmm? Fire this time. At least it's not as bad as the time she was spitting acid at the unfortunate civilians below. Sighing he sat with heavy thoughts on his mind. Well, maybe they weren't that heavy.
"Why don't you like her?" He might as well get straight to the point. Catherin was waiting for him at the park. He had planned to sneak out, but thought his brother would be nice since he was making Leo's breakfast, so he'd let him go. Plan backfired. The only thing he'd accomplished was tipping him off that Damien wanted to leave.
"'Cause she's a Harpy." He said shoveling some pancake into his mouth. He stared at Leo blankly.
"Wow, that's amazing. I'm speechless." He said staring at his brother. A Harpy? That a new one. Where does he get this stuff anyways? Had he even had a real conversation with her? No.
"Yeah, I have that effect on people." He said conceited, going to dip a piece of pancake into a puddle of syrup when he realized was almost gone. Reaching over he quickly dipped it into the syrup on Damien's plate. "Hey!"
"Wha?" He said around the food in his mouth. He really was like a kid at times! Damien pushed the bottle of near Leo's plate. Where it stood untouched.
Leo just stared at it, then dipped another piece of pancake onto his plate again. "Why?" Damien asked simply setting down his knife and fork.
"You used too much syrup. It'd go to waste anyways." He reasoned against Damien. Leo was a weird one. Ever since they grew apart, Damien couldn't even begin to know what was in his mind. Everything was a mystery to him. He'd give anything to be able to read his brother's mind for one day and finally know what's up with him.
"Fine, whatever." He surrendered his syrup to the enemy. He worked on finishing his plate first to make it easier. Then he'd go to his room and pretend to lock himself in, but really go out his window. He was sure this plan would be seen through to the end. No matter what. Looking up at his brother dumbly eating pancakes, he was reassured.
Leo looked up at his brother. What did he see in the Evil Catherin? She wasn't that great. Normal really. What's so special about her. Was it the hair? In his opinion, she has too many split ends, and doesn't take care of it properly. His hair, on the other hand, was long and beautiful. It had a healthy sheen to it.
Curse that Harpy. Yeah, that's his new name for her. He watched his brother trying to get done first. Leo knew full well that his brother was probably thinking of a way to sneak out. Damien, once again, was too predictable.
His brother stirred the piece of pancake around the syrup until it was completely smothered in the golden liquid. He brought it to his lips, but some of the syrup started to trickle over his lips and down to his chin. Leo was entranced. His mind filled with some un-pure images that he quickly tried to banish.
Suddenly his mind took a complete blank. He stood up with his palms on the table. The war in his mind took a turn for the worse. The chair fell back behind him. Though he didn't remember walking over to him, he was standing next to Damien. Leo couldn't take it anymore. This was torturing him. The monster inside clawed at him creating agonizing gashes.
"Wha!" Damien yelped at the sudden movement. Leo held him so he couldn't move much. His own thoughts flew and he wasn't sure what he was doing. Leo could feel Damien's breath on the hollow of his throat as he leaned in close. He almost went for what he'd craved for so long, but a little flash of sanity made him hold back. Still he couldn't stop himself completely. Getting closer he ran his tongue along the small line of golden brown. Right before he reached Damien's soft lips, he stopped. Pulling back he attempted to control what was left of him. That had taken everything in his power to do.
When his thoughts cleared and he could think properly, he let his brother go. Damien fell into his chair again bewildered. "What was that?" He asked.
"It would have gone to waste." He answered hiding the emotion from his voice. Leo began to leave the kitchen, "And don't even think about sneaking out." He said coldly over his shoulder before going on to take a shower upstairs.
When he finally got to the bathroom, he locked the door, and stood there for a moment before falling to the ground. This wasn't good. He'd done something really bad. What was going to happen now? Not even Leo knew what he wanted. Something had to be done soon.
Damien sat stunned, and only lightly wondered how Leo had know he was thinking about sneaking out. And what the hell was that just now? He was very confused at this point.
Though as he sat there thinking about it, the initial shock faded. The more he rationally thought, it all went back to a false since of right. Leo was just his older brother. That's it. Leo was being mean to him again. That's all.
So to fight off the truth, he became mad at Leo for not letting him go meet up with Catherin. He focused all his mind on that alone. Leo was being mean to him because he didn't like Catherin. For reasons that were unknown to him.
Pulling out his cell phone, he searched the contacts list until he found her number. Then he pressed talk. The rings sounded though his head in a way that made it seem like there was nothing there. Now that's just silly. Catherin picked up.
"Hey Damien. What's up?" She asked cheerfully as she always was. Once again, why didn't Leo like her.
"My idiot brother says I can't go anywhere today. Apparently there's stuff to do around the house that requires my assistance." He said begrudgingly, and in a strained way.
"Why don't you just sneak out?" The question was simple, and he had planned to, but Leo had said not to. Something about the way he said it though…
"I don't know if that's a good idea. He's keeping an eye on me." Damien said. "I'm sorry that I can't make it. I probably won't be able to go tomorrow either. I'll see you at school on Monday. Okay?" And just like that he cleared his schedule for the weekend. Why had he canceled for tomorrow, too? Something made him not want to see Catherin's face. Weird, right?
"Well, okay. If you say so." She replied unsure. "See you." For a moment they stayed on the phone not saying a word, but in the end he heard the flat dial tone first. Although he wanted to be mad at Leo, he wasn't really too beat up over it. Now he could do whatever all weekend, and not have to go anywhere. In a way this was a good thing. In a really upside down kind of way.
As he walked to his room he tried as hard as he could to keep from thinking about what happened. Still it kept coming to his mind. When his brother had done that he couldn't help but be reminded of a kiss. Despite himself, Damien slightly blushed at the idea. It was absurd.
In his room he just sat on his bed. There was literally nothing to do here at this house. Sure he could read, but that was just boring. Nothing was on T.V except Saturday morning cartoons and he'd outgrown those years ago. Eventually he started walking around his room looking for his old notebooks he used to keep under his bed.
Somewhere in this house was a stack of composition notebooks filled with entries of everyday from the age of 11 to 14 he had lived. It used to be a sort of tradition for him. He discontinued it sometime right after he turned 15. When he was bored he's read back on them, and saw how dumb he'd been. Most of the time, he'd laugh at them. Sometimes he'd regret the choices he'd made. Now he couldn't find them.
Giving up, he went into the hallway right outside his door. The shower was running in the restroom. So that's where his brother was. A thought crept into his mind. Damien rarely ever goes into Leo's room. There was nothing better to do. Might as well venture into the unknown.
Damien quietly made his way down the hall to his brother's room. The door opened with out any trouble. Leo's room was a very dark place. The curtains were usually drawn so no light could get through. Today, though, the sun light caught every detail of the room. Illuminating it in a even more sullen way.
The clothes on the floor, the pictures on the walls, and lots of paper was scattered across his desk. Some spilling onto the floor below. Everything was a mess. Surprisingly, something in the raging pile on the desk drew his attention. Leo was an artist, but what he chose to draw wasn't always pretty. Even if it was well drawn. Among the pile though, there was something different.
As he got closer he realized it was a picture of himself. Drawn to perfection like every picture Leo worked on. The detail was almost scary. Like looking into a mirror that didn't show the same expression but still your image. He found himself trying to make the same face as the picture so they could match.
In the picture, he was smiling strangely. Not like he was happy, but like he was hiding something from everyone. It sent a chill down his spine. At that moment her hear the bathroom door open. Damien must have been too distracted since he hadn't heard the shower stop. Dropping the picture he gasped at his mistake. No time.
Looking around he panicked. Leo would be really mad if he found Damien in his room looking at his pictures with out his permission. In worse case scenarios, play dead! In a sense, that's what he did. Not the smartest thing in the world, but that's all he could think of. Plus, when they were little, Damien used to sleep walk a lot. There was no way he could leave the room without his brother seeing him. Climbing into the bed, he pretended to sleep. Damien couldn't think of any alternatives, though there had to be.
He heard the door to the room open, and Leo paused in the door way. When they were little, Damien used to sleep walk a lot. Would it be so weird to fall asleep here like in the old days. Well, the moment of truth.
Leo looked into his room shocked. There was Damien asleep on his bed. Just when he'd finally settled down after what happened with the syrup. He wasn't sure if he could deal with this. Not now, at this time. The thought to turn around and go downstairs crossed his mind. To escape from the monster's influence.
For some reason, he continued into his room. The better idea was to get out, he knew. Still, all the way in the rational side of his mind argued with him the whole way. But even that side was just a thought. It had no will or power over him.
Leo walked up right beside the bed, his mind shaking in a way that was dangerous. Then something hit him. What was he doing? This was all wrong. They were brothers. Why couldn't he control himself? In the moments that followed, he felt sick. Why was he this way? It was killing him.
Walking over to his bed he shook Damien.
"Please wake up." He tried, but he couldn't keep the distress out of his voice. Damien needed to get out now, or who knows? Anything could happened. There was something wrong with Leo's head. He was sure now. Something he couldn't do anything about.
Damien stirred, and sat up looking confused at Leo. What did he want, why was he even here, Leo thought.
"You have to get out of my room." He said quietly. "Please." He didn't care if Damien thought he was acting strange. He just needed to get away.
Damien pulled back the covers, and stood up looking unsettled. He brought himself closer to Leo. "Are you okay?" The question unraveled his mind and he wanted nothing more than to ask Damien to make it all better.
"Yes." Leo answered thickly to both him and his mind. Damien stood, and Leo all but pushed him out the door. When it was quiet again Leo broke down. Tears filled his eyes as he finally realized the extent of the situation. He felt such self loathing at that moment.
How could he feel like this for his own brother?