HPXAT:WFaJ
Chapter 1 - Mortal Folly part 1
""Oh would that infernal windows sound just CEASE!"" came a mental shout from an uninhabited mountain...well...except one semi-immortal, semi-crazy, very bored, thousand+ year aged, L. Who was just trying to meditate in the morning sun, if SOMETHING didn't keep interrupted her.
That sealed it, she was finding the source of that infernal start-up sound and shutting it down. Hard.
With that thought in mind she made a small hop back in time and flew inverse to the slowed sound waves, minor ripples in the air as though travelling through jam.
Easy peasy.
If it didn't take five hours of slow time to find the source.
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To that end, L was flouting in front of a stupidly shaped tree house, although she had to admit that it did look pretty appealing.
As time sped up again, L ignoring the sonic booms following her trail, she heard the end of an epic bro-fist. "Dammmn."
After the last `Boom ended, shaking the tree house, alerting the residence to her presence rather abruptly. If the screams were any indication.
The door burst open, revealing a human and a strange yellow thing, sporting a dog-ish shaped face. "Weird."
"WHO THE MATH ARE YOU!?" shouted the boy.
Oops, L only then realised that she hadn't cut her hair or restricted its growth in over one hundred years and most likely looked like some kind of black, hair monster.
With that in mind, a short range cutting spell erupted in a circle at her waist as gravity was temporarily increased to make it an easier cut, slicing her hair off at the waist, the rest clipping out of her face seemingly by itself.
It revealed blue-ish skin, green glowing eyes , pointed ears and teeth, finished off with a well-shaped face. This was combined with a form fitting black toga styled robe and light grey leg wraps leading into dark grey boots.
"oh, YO MARCY WHY YOU UP THERE, DID SOMETHING HAPPEN?" shouted the boy, apparently `recognizing` L.
She floated down in curiosity, seeing the other two walk into their house, speaking to each other. "Damn.", she only then realised again that she'd not used her vocal cords in quite some time. In the end she just floated down into the house, not bothering with walking, and up through a ladder hole onto the second floor. She settled to float above the couch, watching the boy bring over a sentient games console, which promptly said. "This isn't Marceline."
And all hell broke loose around her, L simply floating, not at all bothered by the situation.
Even as the dog, Jake apparently, tried to wrap around her, only to find that he couldn't.
This being because she'd activated a spherical shield spell, even as the boy, apparently called Finn, rushed towards what appeared to be a phone. He picked up the receiver, dialling quickly, before shouting for some `Marceline`, evidently the mixed identity, to "get her But over there", in a slightly freaked tone of voice.
L simply floated inside her shield, crossing her legs and slipping into her own mind.
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Marceline burst into her old house, quickly floating upstairs, only to stop in shock at the sight in front of her.
It was her elder sister.
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""Oh, hey sis, long time no see."" greeted L nonchalantly, Jake and Finn gasping loudly. Very loudly. Afterwards Finn seemed to faint, muttering to himself how Marceline would kill him for trying to hurt her sister. "That guy Has to have an over active imagination."
"Yo, long time no see sis. You finally come down from that mountain, eh?" replied Marceline, flicking her hair out of her eyes and floating closer as Jake unwrapped himself.
"So Marcy, I've got to ask. When did you get a sister, is she a vampire too?"
"Jake."
"yeah?"
"You can't `get` a sister unless your mom gives birth to one or one of your parents re-marries. I've always had a sister, after all, she's older than me." Dead-panned Marceline, giving Jake a Look.
After an awkward silence, during which L `comm'd` Marceline, Finn woke back up screaming about his blood being sucked and fell over.
After he picked himself back up he began to spout questions.
"How?When?What?How? Did y-? Is she? Can someone explain?" The last being muttered more than anything.
""If you'd stop making that Infuriating sound EVERY other morning then we wouldn't even be in this situation, maybe I would be done with meditation and finally get my project done. How do you even have access to a computer that still runs on a Windows operating system that was old before the war."" Thought L, directing it at the other occupants of the tree house. A flood of excitement rushing back from Marcelines mind.
"Oo Oo, is it like my sweet hat!?" questioned Marceline, hopping up and down in the air, obviously excited about the prospect of her sister making something, acting all together far too young for her age.
"Your hat?" came from Finn.
"You know. My big sun hat, haven't you ever wondered how it shades me even when I'm looking at the sun when I have it on.?" said Marceline, still looking quite excited.
"Oh yeah, how does that happen?" this time from Jake.
""Oh that's quite simple, I used a runic array in a language, that even Prismo and Cosmic owl don't know, to tether a level 96 shadow demon to the brim of the hat, having the parameters sewn into the rim with nanofibres. Seriously, if you looked at it under an electron microscope then you'd see that the entire wide-brim is covered in runes. It has to be really high level to block direct sunlight. Problem is, that the runes would burn through the rim and release the demon if not charged every now and then, and not overstressed. It's an issue that I haven't been able to solve so far, or she could wear it all the time."" explained L, conveying the information instantly.
"LEVEL 96 DEMON. Marceline, we need to kill your hat!" shouted Finn, completely missing the fact that both Marcy, Jake and L had facepalmed at his exclamation.
""You do know what tethered means, right?"" asked L, keeping part of her mind on keeping Finn away from her sisters hat. ""Plus that thing took, like, 18 years to make, and anyway, your sword isn't powerful enough to cut it."" came from L, deflating Finns mood rather drastically.
Suddenly a pink gem in the corner began to beep and vibrate, after a few seconds a pink image popped out of it, showing Bubblegum Princess.
""Heilige Schiesse, bist das du Bonnie!?"" `shouted` L, flying towards the hologram, stopping a bare centimetre from the screen.
"Oh mein Glob, L, was machst du by Finn und Jakes?" replied PB, also knowing L, much to Finn and Jakes confusion. Especially since they were speaking german.
""Sie haben ein geräusch jeden andern tag gemached und es hat mich entlich so geärgert das ich zu eiren hause geflohgen hab um heraus zu finden wie und warum sie es gemacht haben."" explained L, seeing first the confusion and then realization on Pebbles face.
"It's okay guys, she's cool. I was just calling to ask if you could come to the candy kingdom, I want to see if you guys can meditate." said PB, "would you mind if L came with, I'd quite like it if she did?"
""They already ruined my morning so I'm coming whether they like it or not."" `said` L, still a bit miffed about the destruction of her calm atop the mountain.
"Well now that that's decided, Finn and Jake, why don't you escort L over to the candy kingdom then we'll get on with meditating."
"Okay PB, we'll show her the way, won't we Jake?" shouted Finn, turning to bro-fist his bro.
"Sure bro, since PB says she's cool then cool. Plus she's Marcelines sister." replied Jake, completing the bro-fist, not willing to leave his bro hanging. He then grabbed Finn, transforming to pick him up, beginning to walk towards the candy kingdom.
""Sooo, she still isn't talking to you?"" asked L, looking at Marceline, feeling a bit sad for her sister.
"No -" sigh "-she isn't." sighed Marceline, looking slightly forlornly at the pink gem sitting in the corner.
""I'm sure you'll make up someday...you used to be so close."" finished L, then following Jake and Finn, hearing her sisters sad sighs very clearly.
END OF CHAPTER
German:
""Holy shit, is that you Bonnie?""
"Oh my Glob, L, what are you doing at Finn and Jakes?"
""They were making this sound every other day and it annoyed me enough to fly to their house to find out how and why the were doing it."" Please don't hate me for the delay in general writing, I'm only creative sporadically and I've been rewriting and writing the stuff I've already got as well as several sequels. I'm putting this up because it shouldn't have too much effect on the chronology except revealing a few powers and jazz.