Disclaimer: I do NOT own Wicked Lovely, Melissa Marr does. And I have to say she is amazing!
Hey guys! :) this is my first story here so be gentle! :) Anyway, tell me if you love it or hate it!
Thanks! :)
The other girls twirled around me. Laughing, giggling, dancing. I wish I could do that. Just be careless and not wish that life was like before. Not wishing I never met him. Not wishing that I'd never said yes to that beautiful smile. Not wishing I had just walked past. Not wishing I'd just said I wasn't interested. But I knew I never really meant my wishes.
I still loved him. It was plain and simple. Those few weeks we had been together, were the best of my life. He made me forget. Forget my abusive father. Forget my drunk mother. He had showered me with sunshine. Made me feel loved for once in my life. Even if he didn't, he made me feel wonderful, like I had a purpose.
All the other girls just let go. Accepted what they are. I mean who they are. Keenan told me it wasn't that it changed just my body, it changed me. Made me better. But I didn't feel any different. I didn't have the sudden urge to twirl or giggle at everything. I didn't try to seduce innocent mortals. It didn't feel right. Hypnotizing men by my beauty, it wasn't right.
I would rather read. So that's what I did. I tied my long blond hair in a bun with the stem of a flower. It was the only thing around that I could use. I had my nose stuck into Pride and Prejudice. How passionate Elizabeth was about Mr. Darcy even though she tried to hide it, I knew she loved him. It reminded me of Keenan and I, or at least how I felt.
It was always like that. All the other girls thought that he actually loved them. They thought that a piece was ripped away from him when they said no. They thought he still had a place in his heart for them when he led them into his bed. But I knew. He didn't love any of us. He just used us as play toys. Using us when he wanted to then throwing us away. Letting us weep and scream.
When I'd said no, I thought either way, we could be together forever. Happily Ever After. Riding into the sunset. Like the stories my mother had told me before she started drinking. The faerie kings taking you to their castle and being happy forever. But that never happened. He had shook his beautiful, golden head with something in his eyes. It wasn't sadness, that I'm for sure of. No matter how bad I wanted to believe it, it wasn't. He was disappointed. He'd walked away as I fully changed. The boy that I thought would show me love and loyalty for the first time in a long time, had walked away from me.
He'd walked away from me when I needed him most. When I'd screamed his name, he looked back disgusted. As if he hadn't wanted anything to do with me. That was the day my heart, finally, was crushed. The day where I couldn't find the pieces again.
Even though he had done all of that, I couldn't forget. I couldn't help hoping that he still felt something. Hoping my prince was still in there. Hoping he'd talk to me like he used to. Hoping he'd just hold me like he used to. Hoping he'd help me find all the pieces. But I knew he wouldn't.
Someone cleared his throat in front of me. "Erlina? " Someone asked.
I looked up to find Niall. I knew he was far behind his Dark Court days but something about him sent a shiver though my body. I didn't know if it was the dark hair or his eyes, there was something. But when he smiled, it erased my fears. Something about it made his face light up.
"Yes." I replied.
"Keenan would like to see you." He informed.
"Will you escort me?" I smiled up at him.
Niall was one of the only people I talked to. He was so understanding and charming. He had tried to start something with me but I had brushed it off. But Niall was very stubborn.
"Of course!" He flirted.
He stuck out his elbow as an offering. Accepting the offer, I gently placed my hand on the crook. It felt so good to walk beside him. He was sometimes the only one who could cheer me up.
He bent his lips to my ear and whispered." You know you are my favourite."
"How many of the girls have you said that to?" I smirked.
He laughed. "But you are the only one I am serious about and I've only meant that to you. You are the one I truly want. You are the only one I can talk to for hours and never get bored."
My heart jumped. He'd always flirted but he'd never said anything like that. Something like Keenan had said. Something that would make me miss my old life. If someone had said that to me then, I would have jumped into their arms. But now I knew better. I liked Niall but I couldn't trust him. Not with my heart. Not with my soul. Not with anything. One faery had already crushed them, I couldn't deal with it again. It would just destroy me.
"Why won't you be mine?" He leaned back to stare at me with those dark eyes.
"For how long?" I asked sadly.
" As long as you want." A smile flirted with his lips.
I sighed. "Niall, you know I would love to be with you but-"
"But what? I adore you and I know you adore me. There's nothing easi-"
"Niall, I'm not going to be a play toy. I'm not like the other girls. I'm not just going to fall into your bed and pretend I felt nothing and move on. To even consider anything, you would have to promise a long-term thing and I'm not sure you can do that. Why don't you just ask one of the other girls? I can stand Layla, she's nice though she is VERY perky." I rambled to myself.
Niall stopped walking. He grabbed my shoulders and turned me around. His hands on my shoulders felt so good. Like they were meant to be there. Slowly, his hands trailed from my shoulders down my arms to grab my hands. He looked down at me. He didn't need to look down far because I was only a couple inches shorter.
"I am not him. You are more than a play toy. God! You are more than him. You are more than any girl I have ever looked at. You don't know how hard it is for me to just watch you die everyday waiting for him to save you-"
I ripped my hands away from him and toke a step back. I glared at him.
"Why do you always bring him up anyway? I am over him. I do not wait for him because he is never coming back! Who do you think you are? You say I'm different but you tell me I'm still not over him, like all the other girls. You push me into being in a relationship but my heart is so broken, I'm not even sure I could go though that again! You are just like all of them, you make empty promises you will never keep!" I screamed at him.
I screamed at him with all the hate and betrayal in my heart that I'd kept in for so long. The frustration I had for my feelings for Niall and how I could never let go of Keenan. The hate I had for my father who beat me to the pulp and for my mother who didn't care if I was beaten so bad I couldn't even walk, she just picked up a bottle. I didn't know what was worse. At least my father had cared enough to beat me compared to my mom who drank so much she couldn't remember who I was. Even when she was sober, she only cared about getting another drink. The pain I had because I had nobody, the love of my life had walked away from me and had been living a lie.
Finally, I looked back at his eyes. All I could see was pain, betrayal, frustration, hate. Everything I felt. I was making him feel all my pain. Everything I ever did was to make people happy and now I'd just ruined it all. His eyes made me want to cry.
"I would never do that to you. I thought you knew that." He said calmly. "Well, you know where Keenan is, I have other things to do. I bid you farewell."
He turned around. He walked away from me. Acting like a gentleman and not screaming at me. I almost wish he had. He could blow off steam. But him walking away reminded me of when Keenan walked away from me. I stood there like an idiot. Just staring after him. Without even realizing it, my feet were moving to meet him.
"Niall, I'm so sorry. You don't ever deserve anything that I did. I don't know why I did that. I am so sor-"
"You aren't sorry, don't even try to pretend." He snapped.
"How can you say I'm not sorry? Can you at least look at me?" I asked.
He turned around. His usual warm, brown eyes were transformed into black holes of hatred.
"Did you know that Erlina means Violet Flower?I bet you Keenan never knew that." He snarled the last sentence.
He took out something out of the long, black coat. I saw a flash purple before it hit the ground. He shook his head before he turned around and walked away. I walked over to where Niall had dropped the object. It was a flower. The violet ones my grandfather had on the side of his house. My grandfather had always said they were the same colour as my eyes. I'd only told two people about those flowers: Niall and Keenan. I picked up the flower and smelled it. It smelled like Niall and a hint of floral. I pulled the stem out of my hair and pushed the flower behind my ear.
I walked up to the doors into Keenan's house.I sighed and knocked on the big wooden doors.
Tavish opened the door. "Hello, Erlina. Keenan was just asking about you. He's in his bedroom."He nodded.
I walked past him. I found Tavish to be a suck up to anyone in sight. Especially Keenan. But he was nice to me unlike the other faeries. Who didn't talk to me. Who whispered behind my back. Who I was nothing like. Who I never wanted to be like.
I walked around the house. It was large, grand as you may was modern and vintage all at the same time. If I was mortal, I would have been amazed and walk around for hours just exploring. But now, most places in the Summer Court looked like this. You didn't know what to make of it but it was beautiful with the tall ceiling and the wide windows. Everything about this place screamed perfect.
The door opened. Maya giggled as she walked back still looking at Keenan. Her tan skin glowed. At least until she saw me. Her brown eyes clouded over, she stared at me as if she wanted to throw up.
"The feeling is mutual!" I thought to myself.
I rolled my eyes. Maya was the worst. She thought she was better than everyone just because she was the first girl. Like the queen, the leader, the trend setter, the head honcho, the captain...the list goes on. That's what she thinks she is. The thing is the other girls treated her like one. Whatever Maya said , went. No exception. Well except if you are me. Girls like that used to bug me. And there she was in Keenan's room. The thought angered me.
"You may come in." Keenan's voice shattered my thoughts.
It took all the strength in me to not melt. To not jump into those arms. To not become speechless. Even after all this time, after everything he did to me, he still had such a hold on me, I couldn't get over him. Niall was right. I was waiting for him to save me.
"I don't think you need me. Maya would come back in a flash. She's like a new barbie, you know, she's there whenever you want her then when you're done playing, you can throw her in the play basket and she won't care, she'll come back. I think you two would be a great couple, you're both fake!" I snapped.
The door slowly opened a little further to show Keenan. He was dressed in, if you can even call it dressed, in a pair of beaten up, old jeans. They road low on his tan hips and suited him nicely. On the right pocket, there was a heart drawn on with a blue pen. Something was scribbled in the middle. They seemed familiar. As if I'd seen them before.
"Do you like the jeans?" He asked, he looked down at himself.
"Yeah, they're nice." I responded calmly."Why?"
"Good. You should like them. You bought them." He smiled.
That's why they were so familiar. I could still remember that day. We were sitting on my bed. Well, he was spread across my bed and I was beside him. He looked out of place on my violet comforter. We had gone shopping that day. I hadn't wanted to but he made me.
He had said. "I want you to wear me on your skin."
It was cheesy but I fell for it. He had bought me everything you could thing of. Shirts, jeans, dresses. I wanted to buy him just as much but he just quieted me with another dress to try on.
Finally, I had enough with being silent and I said, "If you don't let me buy you something, I'll return all of the clothes."
After arguing for a few minutes, he let me buy him a pair of jeans. I had loved them. We'd gone back to my house and he made me try them all on. I had to admit it was alot of fun. I had felt like a model. I can't believe he remembered that. That had been so long ago, at the beginning of our relationship. I can't believe it.
I can't believe I fell for it. Of course, he was only doing that just to make me waver. He knew how to break me, please me, treat me ,mistreat me, and hurt me.
"Keenan, enough with the games, what do you want?" I demanded annoyed.
"Why does there always have to be a reason. Maybe, I just wanted to see you. How about that?" He arched up his beautiful, golden eyebrow questioning.
I rolled my eyes. "Because I know you."
"Yes, you do." He laughed, "Anyway, I need you to do something for me."
"What?" I asked ,aggravated.
"I need you to seduce a certain mortal-"
"Keenan, you know I don't do that! Why don't you just ask another girl?" I begged.
I stared up into his unnaturally green eyes. Just asking for one thing. I knew why he was asking me. It's because he knows I hate to. It's against my beliefs.
"I'm sorry, I really am but I have to make it personal." His eyes clouded over with mischief.
I froze. Personal? Was it someone from my old life. Someone from school, someone from work, someone on the street. I couldn't help bring them into my world. It was cruel, evil and beautiful. I guess I was wrong, he didn't do it because it was against my beliefs, he did it to torture me.
"What's the girl's name?" I asked coldly.
"Donia." he said casually.
I froze. My body, my thoughts my soul, everything froze. Donia had been my best friend in my old life. We were the two blondes, she had had done everything together. She had been the only one to come over to my house, the only one I told secrets to, the only one I told about the abuse and about my mother. She had been my best friend, my sister, my guide, my side-kick. She had always turned to me and I had always turned to her. She was one of the things I missed about my old life.
"Please Keenan, not her. I will do anything, ANYTHING! Just ,please, not her." I begged.
My knees buckled sending me to the cold, hard ground. I was on my hands and knees. My whole body shaking. My breath laboured. My vision became blurry with tears. Nothing else mattered except keeping Donia safe. I didn't care what the cost was, I just needed to keep her from becoming one of us. Needed to keep her safe from being tricked. Needed to keep her safe from getting her life taken away. Needed to keep her safe from getting her heart broken.
"Anything?" He asked.
He was looking down at me. His eyes full of mischief. His eyebrows arched up was thinking.
"Y-E-E-ES!" I cried.
"Meet me here tomorrow at 6:00 and wear something nice. You may leave." He dismissed me.
I picked myself up and ran. I didn't care who I ran into. Faeries stared after me confused and disgusted. But I didn't care. I burst through the doors and ran into the courtyard. Someone called my name but I was already gone.