Revenge
So that you could see the darkness of it. So that you could see how the need to be punished and the need to inflict pain melded together in one, harmonious symphony of violence. A haze of uncontrol. A haze of reason and unreason, where your revenge and your expectations were fulfilled. Revenge of the pain. Of the dead ones that were taken away. Of the horror and loss you want so desperately for them to feel.
And the expectations. The standards. That anyone who hurt the ones you loved-the ones you couldn't live without-would suffer. Suffer ot the point of death. To the point of insanity. To the point where they just didn't want to live anymore.
Like you.
Like how you didn't want to live anymore. Not without the ones you loved.
And it is these feelings that spawn the others-the need to see them suffer. The need to know that they at least felt as much pain as you did. To know that they hadn't won.
That you hadn't lost.
That's why you beat them.
That's why you kill them.
That's why you make them suffer.
That's why you take revenge.