Loss. And Pride (Fic)
Disclaimer: The characters don't belong to me, they belong to Henson's, I've just snurched em for a sec.
Setting: post- pkw, you decide how long after.
This has been kicking around in my head for a while, specifically how it begins, until last night when it wouldn't leave me alone, I should have really written it all down then, so I know some things will be different to how I first wanted it to be worded. I think it may be shorter than first envisioned due my forgetfullness, I had whole reams of conversation thought up and now I have, well whatever is written here.
This is my first EVER fanfic. Be gentle, I bruise easily. Nah, be as kind or harsh as you like, as long as it's polite . And there is no Beta for this, oh fool am I.
LOSS AND PRIDE
Aeryn descends from her prowler, not with the usual confidence a lifetime as a peacekeeper has instilled in her, but with a deep ingrained fear in her heart. She knows the reason for it but still can not quell the nausea it causes, knowing that when she arrives at her quarters, the look that will be in the eyes of the two men she cares more deeply about than anything she could ever have imagined for herself, the look of hope from one and despair from the other will more than likely destroy any belief she has of hiding how much her heart is breaking, knowing when she passes on the information she has gleaned from her brief visit to the command carrier, it could destroy the family she has built, is almost to much to bare.
On her approach, returning to moya, she informed the others on board, all those she now also considers family, filled them in, as her husband would say, of everything she had discussed with Braca, who knew he could be so understanding of the situation, and to her surprise he had become a better leader than anyone could have imagined, the scarran war had obviously given him a backbone and for that reason she felt a slight comfort in the decision that was about to be made. She understood the reasoning behind her feelings, that it had to do with the past and not the present, she knew things were different now, because of the peace accord and the assistance the eidelons had given, she knew she could be proud of that fact, but still...
She recalled the past few solar days, the arguments they had succumbed too in the discussion of the matter, the pleading from both sides and the look that had convinced her to contact the peacekeepers and make the request. After much deliberation with Braca she had finally agreed to the terms, but only after she had convinced Braca that their family would stay together, they would all just have to accept it.
As she neared her quarters, she could hear her family and it hit her again how this would change them, she swallowed down the bile she felt creeping up into her throat and took a deep breath as she opened the door. They both turned and looked at her, in their eyes she saw what she had been dreading, he spoke first, 'what did they say'. She swallowed again knowing that if she didn't she would choke on both the bile and the words she was about to speak, 'Son, the peacekeepers have accepted your application, you begin training in three solar days.'